Veil Question

[deigloriam]

I’ve been attending the TLM for about 7 years now, and my wife has worn a veil since we were dating in college (after an excruciating amount of resistance, I might add). Anyway, I’m curious as to whether there is a “code” to the color of the veils. My wife wears an off-white (I’m a man, so my palette is limited, ladies) one, and I also see white-white, black, etc. Is one color for single vs. married ladies or is black just for widows? I saw something on another post that got me wondering.

 

[PatienceAndLove]

What has been done traditionally is:
Black/dark for married ladies and white/light for unmarried ladies. However, it is completely appropriate to coordinate the color of one’s veil with one’s outfit.
Since it is now a private devotion, colors don’t matter.

Hope that helps!

 

[Magnum_V8]

What has been done traditionally is:
Black/dark for married ladies and white/light for unmarried ladies. However, it is completely appropriate to coordinate the color of one’s veil with one’s outfit.
Since it is now a private devotion, colors don’t matter.

Hope that helps!

I have a question, and its completely in reference to something from the Bible. Also, I’m a man, so it really doesn’t affect me anyway.

Much, or all, of Paul’s point in discoursing on women wearing headcoverings is to promote a humble and submissive character. The headcovering was intended to cover up the woman’s hair because her hair was very important to her.

Now, would trying to coordinate the veil and the outfit, in some way, be a glorification of the veil and/or outfit…therefore defeating the purpose of the veil, as prescribed by Paul?

Just lookin’ for another perspective on this.

 

[PatienceAndLove]

Now, would trying to coordinate the veil and the outfit, in some way, be a glorification of the veil and/or outfit…therefore defeating the purpose of the veil, as prescribed by Paul?

Just lookin’ for another perspective on this.

I don’t think so. Rather, there would be coherancey to the outfit, perhaps making it stand out less.
Women did it back in the day, and many do it now.
My mother has a picture of herself, when she was a child, in her dark blue winter coat and wearing a dark blue veil. I have a picture of my grandmother in a black dress with a black veil.

I, personally, wear my black veil throughout the year, except for the Christmas and Easter seasons, and then I wear my cream one.

Ladies- your opinions?

 

[latinmasslover]

I wondered this myself, but those I asked said it didn’t really matter…it should match the outfit. My hair is very dark brown/black so I always wear a black veil.

Having the color match your outfit isn’t necessarily vain…I would simply do it to blend more so it wouldn’t catch everyone’s attention. however, some do wear it to be fashionable; that way of thinking should be put away.

 

[lizaanne]

I am married and wear either an all black or black with gray lace edge mantilla style (long rectangle that reaches my elbows). I have very dark auburn hair that goes to the middle of my back so I prefer to cover my hair, and would feel very silly in white, it would show up too much.

I agree with coordination to the outfit being ok. I think that if someone had on a navy blue outfit and wore a pink veil it would draw more looks than if she wore a navy veil that blends in and isn’t quite so contrasting. It’s more practicality than vanity.

I will be making one for myself soon that is a sheer black fabric with chocolate brown leaf design on it with black lace on the edge to take with me when we go to England next month. I will be wearing a special outfit for the blessing of our marriage at my husband’s Church there and want something that matches a bit more than my solid lace mantillas.

Hope that helps! God bless your wife in her devotion.

~Liza

 

[CrypticWritings]

You know what would be cool is if some Catholic women started designing some really nice looking veils that are not too decorative, or too bright to attract attention or become trendy, but rather “elegant”.
They should be able to match a womans clothes, and should not all have to be lace (though that is fine too), but could be solid fabrics as well.

For example, I like this one:
halo-works.com/c=BtkBOZBzYNZK2asm19NZ4svdl/product/VO81642
It is Spanish style: long, black and has gold fabric woven into it or something I can’t tell.

You see (well you can’t see me here though ), but I’m a male, rather young (late 20’s), and I must admit, for as much as I hear women complaining about not wanting to wear them, I can’t see why they are so against it. Something about a woman in a chapel veil, whatever her age, has a beauty that commands respect… I don’t know if it is me personally, or something psychologically with more men other than me, but I even act a little different around women like this. I’m alway respectful, but with women showing that humility I usually end up being more soft spoken and formal with them. Perhaps it puts the fear of God in me? It is just like the tradition and discipline of always covering what is sacred behind a veil (there is one on the tabenacle too!). Women who dress modest, keep a sense of “mystery” about them…it is beautiful! I hope someday women discover that modesty (which is for men and women) doesn’t have to equate to “Little House on the Prarie style” or be uncomfortable.
Hmmm…maybe those nice gothic style dresses will make a comeback! Then Men can wear some other kind of cool looking semi-formal wear when not in suits…hmmm…
I’m not saying this trend needs to start by any means, but I remember being in the middle east for a while and there was this young woman working at the airport who was wearing the all black robe/mantle and therefore had a veil over her head/hair, but not over her face. I think it is called an Abaya which is different thatn the burqa. Anyway, she was at the information desk facing the opposite direction and when I walked up and she turned around at hearing my question of “excuse me, can you tell me where this terminal is located.” I just about had a stroke and forgot all about my terminal problem I was so mesmerized. When I walked away I remember I asked God something like “how could she be that beautiful” since I couldn’t stop thinking about her and the situation and it gave me a whole new perspective (very positive) on modesty. Nothing tempting, just respectful and pure…love it!

Ah, perhaps one day fashion will be good again. I know Italians (in general) dress much better than Americans…maybe we’ll pick up on that some day soon?

About the black and white colored veils…I don’t know who wears what, but I’ve seen married and single wear both colors.

 

[JoeMike]

I remember when I was a kid, most women seemed to be wearing either scarves or hats at Mass. More of those than veils, so I thought I’d throw out a reminder that veils aren’t the only choice for a head covering.

I also remember watching a mother put a Kleenex with bobby pins on her daughter’s head, because the girl had forgotten whatever she was going to cover her head with. (point being: it doesn’t *have *to be a veil)

 

[Rachele_Ann]

CrypticWritings;2656519]You know what would be cool is if some Catholic women started designing some really nice looking veils that are not too decorative, or too bright to attract attention or become trendy, but rather “elegant”.
They should be able to match a womans clothes, and should not all have to be lace (though that is fine too), but could be solid fabrics as well.

I agree with you. Perhaps specifics are a bit off topic but this might be what you are thinking of… a little less lace? I’ve never ordered from this company although I hear they are quite good.headcoverings.com/_borders/Coveri58.jpg

for as much as I hear women complaining about not wanting to wear them, I can’t see why they are so against it.

I certainly am not in a position to speak for all women but I will say…at risk of being impaled on a virtual stick that in a typical NO parish where no one wears a veil it is contrary to modesty in that it will just draw attention to oneself. Women that go to church to be truly prayerful dress modestly and simply so as not to stand out. This is one of the things that has me so excited about the motu proprio… hopefully with more Tridentine masses there will be more headcoverings in church and it will be less of a sensation.

Something about a woman in a chapel veil, whatever her age, has a beauty that commands respect… I don’t know if it is me personally, or something psychologically with more men other than me, but I even act a little different around women like this. I’m alway respectful, but with women showing that humility I usually end up being more soft spoken and formal with them. Perhaps it puts the fear of God in me?

I don’t wear a veil (yet) but I will say I noticed a huge difference in the way men treated me when I put aside my jeans and slacks and switched to dresses and skirts. I don’t know if its a good thing or a bad thing… but a woman’s attire does seem to affect the behavior of men.

Now, actually ON topic! There may be some association with color derived from religious orders. Novices and in some orders the temporary professed often wear white veils while perpetually professed nuns and sisters are usually given black veils as a sign of penance. Perhaps that is where the married/ unmarried black/white veil idea comes from.

Peace in Him,
Rachele

 

[baltobetsy]

I will be making one for myself soon that is a sheer black fabric with chocolate brown leaf design on it with black lace on the edge

Liza, how about a photo of this gorgeous-sounding fabric? Please?

Betsy

 

[lizaanne]

Liza, how about a photo of this gorgeous-sounding fabric? Please?

Betsy

Sure! I have not looked it at in weeks - I guess it’s more of a bronze floral than leaves, and SO much more sheer than I thought! This is going to slide right off my head, I just know it. Hmmmm - will have to work on that when I put it together.

The fabric is from Haberman Fabrics - they carry the most amazing high end fabrics I have ever seen. This came from the clearance rack - $4.99/yard - I wish you could feel it, it feels like silk!

http://img444.imageshack.us/img444/5770/1010023mo0.jpg

This one is against a turquoise pillow so you can see it a bit better:

http://img67.imageshack.us/img67/9118/1010024qv3.jpg

~Liza

 

[cazayoux]

Hello !

I always think of a veil as a protector of something.
We see veils everywhere in the faith.

I have a writeup I’ve put together on my thoughts.
I wonder if the veil women wear can be connected in some way to these thoughts.

---

I’ve always been intrigued by the keeping of the tablets that held ‘the Word of God’ brought down the mountain by Moses. The description in the bible of the tent mentioned that the ark of the covenant was in the holiest part of the tabernacle (tent), behind a veil. Nobody would be able to walk into the tent and directly see the ark.

Even when the temple was built, the ark was kept behind a veil in an area called the holiest of holies. Only the high priest was allowed to go to that area and it was only once a year.

We consider the 10 commandments, the ‘Word of God’.
We consider Jesus the ‘Word of God made Flesh’.
We know that the Eucharist IS the body of Jesus.

As a Catholic, I see in many (not all) tabernacles, that the Eucharist is placed in there behind a veil. Again, as in the temple, the ‘Word of God’ is kept in the holiest of holy areas in the Church, the tabernacle, behind a veil.

Even during mass, the not yet consumed eucharist is placed in the container and covered with cloth. I guess it could be considered another veil. As I was doing a rosary the other day I was thinking about all of this.
What about during Christ’s life? What role has a cloth or veil played in his life?
And what is occuring to me now as I write this that i didn’t think of before is His burial cloth!

The altar in a Catholic Church is actually a representation of Christ’s body. This is why the priest kisses it as he enters for mass. The point being, this representation of Christ’s body is ALSO covered with cloth. Another veil?

My thoughts while doing the Joyful mysteries was about Jesus in-utero… conceived by the Holy Spirit within a virgin. A virgin. What makes her a virgin? Yet another VEIL! … but this one of flesh.

I would think that the Jewish Scholars during old testament times, if expecting the Messiah to be the word of God made flesh, would naturally have foreseen the Messiah to be born of a virgin.

Anyway … this is not theology … just ramblings.

Cheers!

michel

 

[lizaanne]

michel - I think that is gorgeous!! Truly something to meditate on this Sunday while at Mass.

Thank you for sharing that!

~Liza

 

[CarrieH]

I certainly am not in a position to speak for all women but I will say…at risk of being impaled on a virtual stick that in a typical NO parish where no one wears a veil it is contrary to modesty in that it will just draw attention to oneself.

That’s why I stick with a scarf, usually something dark which will blend in with my hair. Often I will fold it into what looks like a wide headband, so it is even less conspicuous. Then it is a very private devotion indeed. Anyone who looks at my scarf-clad head is more likely to think “she’s having a bad hair day” than “look at how holy she thinks she is!”

I noticed a huge difference in the way men treated me when I put aside my jeans and slacks and switched to dresses and skirts

I noticed that, too. And I’ve had the same experience with hair length: when my hair is longer, I get treated as more of a lady than when I have it cut shorter. Maybe the contrast of our feminine appearance inspires them to be more gentlemanly, I don’t know.

 

[Rachele_Ann]

That’s why I stick with a scarf, usually something dark which will blend in with my hair. Often I will fold it into what looks like a wide headband, so it is even less conspicuous. Then it is a very private devotion indeed. Anyone who looks at my scarf-clad head is more likely to think “she’s having a bad hair day” than “look at how holy she thinks she is!”

This is a great idea Carrie!

I noticed that, too. And I’ve had the same experience with hair length: when my hair is longer, I get treated as more of a lady than when I have it cut shorter. Maybe the contrast of our feminine appearance inspires them to be more gentlemanly, I don’t know.

I will say this as well, when I decided to embrace my femininity I started acting more like a lady. I used to insist on opening my own doors, now seeing an opportunity for men to do a kind deed, I graciously thank them… how dare I refuse to let anyone be kind to me. I was thinking on this topic as I was going to bed last night and I thought to myself that when we dress and act like men, it probably doesn’t occur to most men to treat us like women.

Peace In Him,
Rachele

 

[baltobetsy]

Sure! I have not looked it at in weeks - I guess it’s more of a bronze floral than leaves, and SO much more sheer than I thought! This is going to slide right off my head, I just know it. Hmmmm - will have to work on that when I put it together.

The fabric is from Haberman Fabrics - they carry the most amazing high end fabrics I have ever seen. This came from the clearance rack - $4.99/yard - I wish you could feel it, it feels like silk!

Wow, Liza, that’s beautiful!

OK, how about if you put the “hook” side of an inch of velcro on a small clippy barrette that you stick in the hair on top (or two pieces and two barrettes for the sides) of your head, and the “loop” part could be hidden in the lace edging…

Betsy

 

[lizaanne]

I’ve thought about that, but I like the front of my veil to lie a bit further forward than back on my head. I may consider making a loop inside to attach it to a small head band which I usually wear anyway to keep my bangs out of my eyes at Mass, and so I don’t have to fuss with my hair under my veil. Hmmmm - will have to work on this. If I decide that the fabric is just to slippery I may just make a shawl out of it since I’m pretty sure I have enough for that, and just get some black lace that will stay put on my head and not worry about it.

~Liza