Vocation and Purity

  • Thread starter Thread starter Anonymous83
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
A

Anonymous83

Guest
Hi all, I wanted to post a very serious question about a problem I have been struggling with for a while now. Before I do, though, I would like to say that I am discerning a vocation to religious life (nun/sister). I’ve been discerning a little less than a year now, and I am sure I have a calling.

However, I have been struggling with sins against purity. I have confessed them, but, no matter how hard I try, it seems I find myself sinning again. I am a physical virgin, but I have viewed pornography several times. I know it is wrong and I should not be doing it, but I fear that I have made it into a bad habit. I do not know if it is an addiction yet. I fear that I may die in mortal sin, and I dread the loss of my Savior, but how do I control this? I feel the devil has me in a stronghold, and I HATE Satan so much! I allowed him to grab hold when I should have said no.

I am feeling so guilty about this, and I should. I do not condone pornography, but it has become my vice. Please help me! I just viewed it again tonight! I fully intend to go to Confession tomorrow, and I will not receive the Eucharist until doing so.

I cannot tell my family. I cannot even fathom that. But how do I go about ceasing this addiction? I have bought the program Covenant Eyes so that I can be held accountable for my actions in real time, but I have no accountability partner! 😦

I worry that my mortal sins will wound my soul so much (I fear they already have), and I worry that I will lose my vocation. I want to be a nun so much, but I would never think about being one while still struggling with this problem. I need help!
 
I have some advice. Don’t despair. Never despair or give up hope that, with the help and grace of God, you can and will overcome these temptations and sinful desires. I am reminded of this every time that I go to confession. Take it one day at a time. Don’t try to resist temptation on your own, but rather turn to God and rely completely on Him. When temptation comes, as it inevitably will, say a prayer and remove yourself from the situation (go for a walk, eat a snack, read a chapter in an interesting book, etc.). And when you are able to receive the Eucharist, pray specifically for purity, as I’m sure you must already do.
As for vocation, don’t allow yourself to get discouraged; that’s just what the devil wants. Remain as close to God as you can and trust that He will lead you where He wills.
Thanks for posting. I’m certain that other young people are struggling with the same things you are and too are trying to overcome them. Hopefully this thread will be a great resource for all of us. You are in my prayers!
God Bless!
 
i had the same problem, or do. the best way for me to stop it, was to keep my life busy. and to not be shown racy pictures, or go to sites with racy pictures. (ie. sites that have provactive advertisements, some gossip sites that have alot of women in bikini, et cetera)

it’s strange how easily accessible porn is, it really needs to just go away.

but i’ve probably been about two weeks clean. it’s a daily thing. it does feel like alcohol addiction or something.
 
Bring yourself to the arms of Our Heavenly Mother - the Immaculate Heart - there you will find the source of purity.
 
Anonymous83 said:
Hi all, I wanted to post a very serious question about a problem I have been struggling with for a while now. Before I do, though, I would like to say that I am discerning a vocation to religious life (nun/sister). I’ve been discerning a little less than a year now, and I am sure I have a calling.

However, I have been struggling with sins against purity. I have confessed them, but, no matter how hard I try, it seems I find myself sinning again. I am a physical virgin, but I have viewed pornography several times. I know it is wrong and I should not be doing it, but I fear that I have made it into a bad habit. I do not know if it is an addiction yet. I fear that I may die in mortal sin, and I dread the loss of my Savior, but how do I control this? I feel the devil has me in a stronghold, and I HATE Satan so much! I allowed him to grab hold when I should have said no.

I am feeling so guilty about this, and I should. I do not condone pornography, but it has become my vice. Please help me! I just viewed it again tonight! I fully intend to go to Confession tomorrow, and I will not receive the Eucharist until doing so.

I cannot tell my family. I cannot even fathom that. But how do I go about ceasing this addiction? I have bought the program Covenant Eyes so that I can be held accountable for my actions in real time, but I have no accountability partner! 😦

I worry that my mortal sins will wound my soul so much (I fear they already have), and I worry that I will lose my vocation. I want to be a nun so much, but I would never think about being one while still struggling with this problem. I need help!
Click to expand...
Several bits of advice:
  1. Everytime you feel this urge to porn, offer it for the conversion of the actors/actresses.
  2. Offer your desires to turn away from it as reparation for the porn industry.
  3. Carry a blessed St. Benedict rosary, and pray regularly on it.
  4. Ask Our Lady under her title of Immaculate Conception to help you. Might also wear the Miraculous Medal as a constant prayer for doing this.
HTH

Blessings,
Cloisters
 
Sister in Christ, persevere!

What everyone said so far is great, and prayer is most important.
Here are some practical things you could do to help:
  • Turn off images in your internet browser… or better, get a plugin so you can have all pictures off as the default and manually add sites you normally visit that you know are safe. I have firefox and a plugin called “ImgLikeOpera”. It’s hard at first, but on the web do you rarely need pictures.
  • Put a picture of the Blessed Virgin Mary somewhere close to the computer screen.
  • If you have a desktop computer in your room, rearrange it so that when you sit your back is to the door… meaning that when people walk by your room they can see what’s on the screen. Don’t use your computer unless the door is open. Or better yet, move it to a room that is common to all.
  • Try to set a time limit at night after which you won’t go on. You could probably find parental control software that can autimatically shut down the computer after certain times. Idleness could potentially be a factor, try finding other things to do away from the computer if you find yourself idle… like reading a book in a different room.
  • Don’t get discouraged and always go back to confession if you fall.
    These can’t stop you completely because anything that you put in the way can be taken out of the way. But they make it harder to happen accidentally and give you more time to heroically let Christ help you in prayer.
Prevention is always best if possible as it’s excruciatingly hard in the moment of temptation to turn away. It might take a while to get passed this obstacle but it can be done, take courage. I try to think how sad I’ll be afterwards and how it’s not worth it at all for a couple minutes of pleasure. In my opinion, maybe the good that God will bring out of this situation is an increased life of prayer and a greater reliance on Him.

peace,
Michael
 
I would advice you to read about the lives of Saints like St. Theresa of Avila, St. Francis, Padre Pio and St. Jerome.

Some of these also suffered from lustful temptations and succesfully sought divine help and support in a religious life.
 
Thank you to all who assisted me. I am confident now that I will beat this evil sin. I am going to Confession in 2 hours and I ask for your prayers to make a good Confession. I desire to “come clean” and join Jesus and His Holy Mother in their Sacred and Immaculate Hearts. Thank you for your unending support. God bless you all!
 
Well done for wanting to turn away from sin; this makes God so very happy! Take the advice given above in trying to remove every opportunity to commit the sin. Little by little, you will learn to control it.

Keep trying and never give in. This is so important; Satan can often trick us into thinking we’re unworthy of Christ, which can ultimately keep us away from Christ’s love. No matter how many times it happens, ALWAYS return to Jesus and keep on asking Him to help you. We are ALL prodigal sons and daughters!

Remember, your body is a tabernacle, in which dwells the Holy Spirit, as He dwells in all of those people in the pictures. Try to remember this should temptation come your way again. God bless you.

(If you are interested in becoming a nun, please take a look at my blog carmelaspirant.blogspot.com/ to see if it helps you in any way. It’s relatively new, but you may find something in there you can relate to. God bless.
 
You must remember that the sin is NOT you. That’s not who you are, try and conquer this, but God looks at your faith more than what he looks at your sin.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top