Vocation questions!

[CrystalWhidby]

This is going to be sooooo vague and I’m sorry but I’m not trying to start an argument with anyone who disagrees about the topic.

What classifies as a vocation?
If I feel a strong pull towards a particular Catholic-related lifestyle and I feel that pull is from God, would that be a vocation? What if my spouse does not feel the same pull and has no desire for it? Is it a sin if I ignore the pull like I’ve been doing for the past few years? Should I ask my priest just in case?
Before anyone asks, I can live this particular lifestyle I feel I’m being called to and remain married without needing to force it on my husband. It would merely be easier if we both shared the desire, but not everything in life is easy.

 

[Trishie]

Crystal, you certainly need to speak to your priest.

A pull may be a pesonal preference for various reasons. Whether relating to something temporal or spiritual, it still has the capacity to be disguised self-will, especially if it is contra to a Sacrament and a vow already offered and received before God.
A “pull” can be based on any number of things associated with disguised self-will.
A pull, a preference, is not essentially a vocation of itself.

There are many ways to be holy and dedicated to God, for instance, but withing marriage the command of God between husband and wife will be based on love that is not selfish to the other. It is based on choices that are often difficult.

Holiness is possible within marriage, as canonized saints like the parents of Saint Therese testify. Louis and Zelie Martin ‘achieved’ holiness and sanctity in living their married life with full respect for the Sacrament. At first they wished to live without the physical part of marriage, and if they had continue the Church would not no have their daughter a Saint, and a Doctor of the Church.

Whatever you feel the pull might be, it isn’t necessarily a vocation.

And whatever it is, especially as it is not in accord with your husband’s wishes within your marriage, your suggestion that you seek counseling with your priest is a good one.

May God bless you and your husband.

 

[Xarto]

I’m not sure what you are alluding to but I’m married and felt a call as well. Took me awhile to figure out what that was and in the end I found a “Third Order” called the Secular Franciscans. I’m currently 4 months in, to a 15month discernment. If not sure if you have heard of TOs before but we pray the Office Morning and Night, try to get daily mass, get to know the Bible and live our lives “going from gospel to life and life to gospel” and meet once a month as part of formation and community. At the end I make a promise (not a vow) to continue doing this for life.