Wait until i'm 18?

[BrooklynBoy200]

Mmmm. But if I recall correctly, BrooklynBoy’s parents are “Catholic.”

Does that scare you?

My mom is Catholic, my dad is methodist.

My dad is kind of ambitious and works for the government and he just doesn’t care about any religion.

My mom is more protestant then catholic. She doesn’t believe in confession, she doesn’t think mass is obligatory, and she once wanted to become protestant because the Catholic mass is “boring”.

Oh yeah, and she thinks purgatory and mortal sin are humourous. And she doesn’t think the bible should be taken literaly. And she won’t let me get a missal or breviary. Ok i’m done complaining now.

 

[mercygate]

I just hope i don’t get hit by a bus before i turn 18

Me too! In fact, I hope you NEVER get hit by a bus.

But God will not hold you accountable for what is not under your control. At this point in your life, respecting your parents is the most important thing.

Maybe this is training for a great future of holiness. How about this scenario: You get scholarships to college or go to cheap/free schools and then seek admission to seminary or a Religious community where you spend the rest of your life interceding for your parents and for young people who are in positions similar to yours.

 

[Image_of_God]

My mom is Catholic, my dad is methodist.

My dad is kind of ambitious and works for the government and he just doesn’t care about any religion.

My mom is more protestant then catholic. She doesn’t believe in confession, she doesn’t think mass is obligatory, and she once wanted to become protestant because the Catholic mass is “boring”.

Oh yeah, and she thinks purgatory and mortal sin are humourous. And she doesn’t think the bible should be taken literaly. And she won’t let me get a missal or breviary. Ok i’m done complaining now.

My family just doesn’t care…almost completely. I am trying to care, but it is hard being the only one. If it weren’t for the Holy Spirit, I would not even be talking here right now. I remember my evil, materialistic ways as a child, I didn’t know about God. At a desperate attempt to know God, I started to read books about astrology and the JW’s (a Catholic family without many Catholic books!) that I found lying around.

I used to be disruptful during the Mass, annoying my mother. I even brought my GameBoy Color to the Mass, and was humiliated when it fell on the floor, made noise and the priest and everyone in the Church looked at me.

It was not until I saw my Anglican aunt praying, that I even attempted to go after God{I still do not think that Anglicanism is the true Church}. I tried, but all I could see were JW books, so I read them. My aunt told me stop reading the Astrology and JW books, so I stopped. So when I turned 13, I started to read the Bible for myself. I got so scared when I saw the “blasphemy against the Spirit” that I locked the doors and hardly came out of the room ever, thinking that God would condemn me to hell for ever.

It was not until I started 8th grade that I discovered what I really was. I knew that I was Catholic, but never thought it mattered. I became more interested in this Catholicism more. And now, I am here. It was God who acted through my Anglican aunt to bring me back to my Catholic faith…note, that it was not her Anglicanism, but her prayer. I wanted to pray to God, just like her, but more Catholic like.

 

[mercygate]

My mom is Catholic, my dad is methodist.

My dad is kind of ambitious and works for the government and he just doesn’t care about any religion.

My mom is more protestant then catholic. She doesn’t believe in confession, she doesn’t think mass is obligatory, and she once wanted to become protestant because the Catholic mass is “boring”.

Oh yeah, and she thinks purgatory and mortal sin are humourous. And she doesn’t think the bible should be taken literaly. And she won’t let me get a missal or breviary. Ok i’m done complaining now.

You have been given a great opportunity here.

Pray for your own need. Pray for patience in your circumstances. Pray for your parents. Doesn’t Scripture tell us that “a little child shall lead them?” Listen to Fr. John Corapi’s conversion story. His conversion was the key to bringing his fallen-away father back to Jesus Christ in the Church!

Patience, humility, and meekness are the three silent virtues. You’re being given the opportunity to practice these a-plenty right now.

I’m offering my next rosary for you, ImageofGod and BibleReader! As an adolescent, I was in a similar position – my parents weren’t Catholic (and neither was I), but they had “issues” with the fact that I went to church at all. They didn’t forbid it, but there was a lot of eyeball rolling.

 

[RobNY]

My parents specificaly said no confession
Well they said either confession or mass. one or the other. I tried to explain that missing mass was a sin, so i would just have to go to confession again. They say protestant things like you don’t need to go to confession and it’s silly and stuff.

Well. If your parents keep you from Mass, then it isn’t your sin. You aren’t culpable for what isn’t your choice.

As for confession and Mass… I have an idea. The first is this: most parishes I know have confession and then Mass. For instance, confession starts at 4PM on Saturday evening, and extends until the 5PM mass. This is probably your best bet. Ask your parents to drop you off early for Mass, go to confession and then to Mass. Since confessional lines are typically short (sadly) it shouldn’t be a problem. If the line is long and you’re running out of time, then if you kindly inform people of your plight, they’ll probably be receptive to letting you go first.

My second idea would be to catch a priest before or after Mass to have confession. It may be somewhat difficult, but it’s always worth a try.

But my overall point would be this: be persistent. Keep up trying to get to Mass or confession as often as you can, and pray for yourself and your parents that their hearts and minds may change.

Besides, most parents I know do tend to like their children, and if they see that this is what you really want, then after a while they may decide to let you do it. After all, you’re not doing drugs or anything. It takes some parents a while to get used to kids who wear dark clothing, and crazy makeup and hair. It may take time for your parents to get used to a kid who keeps the faith. But by all means, keep the faith! Best of luck!

-Rob

 

[Morning_Star15]

This sounds kind of familiar - maybe our moms know each other? I know that’s hard to go through. Thankfully my mom didn’t start opposing my involvement in Catholicism until after I turned 18, so I’m not exactly in your situation, but I still live at home (university’s so expensive ) so I still get some opposition from her when I go to weekday Mass, Confession, etc. What I’ve learned from being in this situation is that this is God’s way of testing my faith - I have to constantly consider how important my faith is to me, and what kind of sacrifices I’m willing to make in order to practice my faith. If I ever catch myself thinking, “I guess I won’t go to weekday Mass tonight because my mom will be upset that I’m ‘wasting my time’ again and give me a hard time again”, I have to remind myself that Christ is supposed to be at the centre of my life. And if He’s at the centre of my life, I should be able to put up with some unpleasant remarks from my mom to be able to receive Him in the Eucharist, right? Think of what He was willing to put up with for us and for our sins. :bigyikes:

My advice to you is to show your mom by word and by action that your faith means enough to you for you to keep practicing despite the obstacles in your way. Be respectful to your parents, by all means, but as other posters have advised, find other ways to get to Mass and Confession. Once they see that their opposition isn’t stopping you, they may become more accepting of your faith.

Just one last note, I also used to be afraid of Confession, but I finally got over that fear when I heard it explained from a priest’s point of view, that this is God’s way of showing us His Mercy, and of welcoming us back with open arms, like the prodigal son. I prefer to refer to it now as the Sacrament of Reconciliation, because that’s what happens: we get reconciled with God and regain our good standing with Him. Christ Himself is present in the Confessor while you’re confessing your sins - it’s a chance to talk to Him one on one, ask Him to forgive you for the things you did that got in the way of your relationship with Him, and maybe receive some guidance on how to avoid repeating those sins.

God bless,

Karolina

 

[BrooklynBoy200]

My family just doesn’t care…almost completely. I am trying to care, but it is hard being the only one. If it weren’t for the Holy Spirit, I would not even be talking here right now. I remember my evil, materialistic ways as a child, I didn’t know about God. At a desperate attempt to know God, I started to read books about astrology and the JW’s (a Catholic family without many Catholic books!) that I found lying around.

I used to be disruptful during the Mass, annoying my mother. I even brought my GameBoy Color to the Mass, and was humiliated when it fell on the floor, made noise and the priest and everyone in the Church looked at me.

It was not until I saw my Anglican aunt praying, that I even attempted to go after God{I still do not think that Anglicanism is the true Church}. I tried, but all I could see were JW books, so I read them. My aunt told me stop reading the Astrology and JW books, so I stopped. So when I turned 13, I started to read the Bible for myself. I got so scared when I saw the “blasphemy against the Spirit” that I locked the doors and hardly came out of the room ever, thinking that God would condemn me to hell for ever.

It was not until I started 8th grade that I discovered what I really was. I knew that I was Catholic, but never thought it mattered. I became more interested in this Catholicism more. And now, I am here. It was God who acted through my Anglican aunt to bring me back to my Catholic faith…note, that it was not her Anglicanism, but her prayer. I wanted to pray to God, just like her, but more Catholic like.

That’s just like me. My protestant aunt is the person who got me interested in God. At first i was going to be protestant, but i think it was history class that got me into Catholicism. I’m embarassed to say that i think the reason i wanted to be Catholic was because the bishops had cool robes. But that of course isn’t the reason anymore. I also discovered Catholicism in 8th grade. And i want to be a priest now. Plus it’s really annoying because my family used to go to Mass every Sunday at a Catholic Church and my saturday school would take me to confession like every month. I hated Mass, Confession, and Saturday school back then. I’m mad because i never took confession seriously back when it was so available to me. But then again, i was never in mortal sin at age 10. My parents started not going to church once they saw i was becoming “too” into it i think. They don’t want me to become a priest so they don’t “encourage me” by letting me receive the sacraments.

 

[Image_of_God]

That’s just like me. My protestant aunt is the person who got me interested in God. At first i was going to be protestant, but i think it was history class that got me into Catholicism. I’m embarassed to say that i think the reason i wanted to be Catholic was because the bishops had cool robes. But that of course isn’t the reason anymore. I also discovered Catholicism in 8th grade. And i want to be a priest now.

I am also thinking about being a priest…although I am not sure.

 

[BrooklynBoy200]

Well a lot of Catholic children take Mass and Confession for granted i guess. We had to discover it on our own so i guess maybe we would want to get into it even more.

 

[Image_of_God]

Well a lot of Catholic children take Mass and Confession for granted i guess. We had to discover it on our own so i guess maybe we would want to get into it even more.

I was always Catholic…I guess I am more like an “Augustine” convert.
People do not care because their parents do not show them how to care.
With all those Sunday School Classes at my Church, I still did not care, because the teachers of those classes never did what they preached.

 

[mercygate]

Hey, Image of God, BibleReader, & Brooklyn:

I’m smelling some big time vocations here!

I would advise all of you to go on the Coming Home Network web site and check into quo vadis. It’s for young people converting to Catholicism, but I think they would have some good counsel for y’all.

 

[Mintaka]

It’s very hard to deal with this sort of thing. Especially when you keep thinking, “Sheesh, I’m not taking drugs, I haven’t joined a gang, what’s their problem!?”

Try to be very straightforward and “normal” about your love for the Church. Don’t try to impress your parents with your fervor; it’ll probably scare them. But do be as nice and helpful as you can get away with. If your parents don’t see anything bad or scary for them coming out of your interest, and you don’t spend a lot of time arguing and talking back about it, they may just relax and realize this isn’t a bad thing for you or them. If you get good grades and people are always saying, “He’s such a good kid!”, it might open their eyes. And if not, you’ve still had the grace of doing good stuff and getting good grades.

If you can’t receive the Sacraments, you can still offer up your frustrations and sorrows, and you can still do nice things for your parents, the kids at school, the teachers, etc.

 

[boppaid]

Mmmm. But if I recall correctly, BrooklynBoy’s parents are “Catholic.”

Does that scare you?

Oh, okay. I must have missed that. And you asked if that scared me…why would it scare me?

 

[boppaid]

As a parent, I am hard pressed to think of what you, BibleReader & BrooklynBoy should do. I do think that all of you need to relax about going to Hell. If you can’t get to confession through no fault of your own, then you are not going to be held responsible.

It may seem like a thousand years until you are on your own and able to go to confession and Mass without offending your parents, but it really is not long at all.

Make an act of contrition. Pray that God will show you the way out of your situation, and respect the parents God has given you.

I know a kid who is now 20, whose parents refused to allow him to become Catholic until he turned 18 – a situation not very different from your own. He is now discerning a vocation to priesthood. All in good time.

God love you all.

Great advice! ITA

 

[mercygate]

Oh, okay. I must have missed that. And you asked if that scared me…why would it scare me?

It sure scares ME when a Catholic parent forbids his child to attend Mass and go to confession!

 

[BibleReader700]

I asked if I could go to confession over the summer and my family laughed at me…I was unaffected by it. I would like to go a lot more, but no one would drive me.
I have went to confession twice, and each time, it backfired. Both times I forgot to ask what the sastifaction should be.
Please, any advice?

My parents kind of just ignore me when i ask. And my confession backfired a bit too. I withheld a sin. So technically i never went to confession at all. But i didn’t know it was grave matter so i guess it’s not a mortal sin, right? But of course i’ll confess it whenever i can go.

 

[BibleReader700]

Well. If your parents keep you from Mass, then it isn’t your sin. You aren’t culpable for what isn’t your choice.

As for confession and Mass… I have an idea. The first is this: most parishes I know have confession and then Mass. For instance, confession starts at 4PM on Saturday evening, and extends until the 5PM mass. This is probably your best bet. Ask your parents to drop you off early for Mass, go to confession and then to Mass. Since confessional lines are typically short (sadly) it shouldn’t be a problem. If the line is long and you’re running out of time, then if you kindly inform people of your plight, they’ll probably be receptive to letting you go first.

My second idea would be to catch a priest before or after Mass to have confession. It may be somewhat difficult, but it’s always worth a try.

But my overall point would be this: be persistent. Keep up trying to get to Mass or confession as often as you can, and pray for yourself and your parents that their hearts and minds may change.

Besides, most parents I know do tend to like their children, and if they see that this is what you really want, then after a while they may decide to let you do it. After all, you’re not doing drugs or anything. It takes some parents a while to get used to kids who wear dark clothing, and crazy makeup and hair. It may take time for your parents to get used to a kid who keeps the faith. But by all means, keep the faith! Best of luck!

-Rob

Well sometimes i’ll wake up and not even ask them because i know what they are going to say, and i’ve exhausted all my asking the night before when they said no.

Sometimes they sneak out of the house early in the morning so i can’t even ask!!! Plus, like i said i withheld a sin from my last confession, so i need a general confession, which needs an appointment.

So i can’t just go before mass.

 

[Kevin42]

Without reading the advice you have already been given, all I can do is urge you to try and get to mass whenever possible. I wouldn’t encourage you sneaking around your parents, but I would encourage persistance. Perhaps ask them once (no more) every week to take you to Church. I’ll certainly keep you in my prayers. If you can’t get to Church, all I can say is that there are some great Catholic podcasts where you can listen to homilies and stuff like that. Plus you have EWTN. Good luck and peace be with you.

 

[Mintaka]

My parents kind of just ignore me when i ask. And my confession backfired a bit too. I withheld a sin. So technically i never went to confession at all. But i didn’t know it was grave matter so i guess it’s not a mortal sin, right? But of course i’ll confess it whenever i can go.

If you withheld a sin on purpose, that particular sin wasn’t forgiven. But that doesn’t invalidate the whole confession, so far as I’ve ever heard. If you didn’t withhold it on purpose but just forgot, that’s unfortunate but doesn’t invalidate the confession, either. (And the sin was absolved anyway.)

Confess the sin when you can. But next time you confess, in case you forget sins between now and then, just tell the priest you’ve probably forgotten some other sins. He can absolve sins you haven’t specifically named, as long as you’re not holding them back on purpose. (And no, I’m not saying you should try to forget the sin. I’m just saying that Jesus is reasonable about providing grace and forgiveness. If you make a reasonable effort, He’ll take care of the rest.)

 

[mercygate]

Well sometimes i’ll wake up and not even ask them because i know what they are going to say, and i’ve exhausted all my asking the night before when they said no.

Sometimes they sneak out of the house early in the morning so i can’t even ask!!! Plus, like i said i withheld a sin from my last confession, so i need a general confession, which needs an appointment.

So i can’t just go before mass.

You don’t need a general confession. You aren’t the first person to withhold a sin in confession. But you must confess that sin and the sin of making a bad confession. Again: you’re not the first person to have to do this. That doesn’t make it OK, but it IS useful to know that the Church has mechanisms short of general confession for doing this.

BTW: when you deliberately withhold a sin (not just forget it) and therefore make a “bad” confession, it does invalidate the sacrament because for a confession to be valid, it must be “integral” – that is, complete to the best of your ability.