Was I being selfish by

[AllyPaige]

My older sister came in my room and (very rudely and disrespectfully) told me she was going to take my old phone, which I keep on my desk. I told her I would rather her not, and she responded with “I don’t care. I’m taking it”. I then tried to explain that I may want to use it, and if it were hers, I couldn’t. So she said “use it or lose it.” and stormed out.

Now, keep in mind: my dad bought this phone for me on my birthday. And it is mine.

I haven’t used it in a little while because I got a new phone. I probably won’t use it much again, I just didn’t appreciate how she came in like she already owned it.

Was me not instantly handing my phone over a form of selfishness on my part?

Thank you

 

[TheLittleLady]

This is something to speak with your parents about. I remember all the rows I had with my sisters, over everything from boys to blouses.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

No, your sister was rude.
Is she severely in need of a phone? Does she have another way of getting one?
Maybe talk to your parents as TLL said.

 

[Annie]

There are going to be many situations in your life when you will need to respond to someone who is being rude, and setting boundaries against that feels, to a nice person, rude.

From your description, it sounds like you did a good job setting and keeping boundaries. Keep it up!

 

[redbetta]

You are not being selfish. She cannot act like she owns other people’s stuff just because they have not used it in a while.

 

[blackforest]

Was me not instantly handing my phone over a form of selfishness on my part?

No. There’s a fine line between selfishness and self-care. Self-care involves not letting people walk all over you and violate your boundaries - stealing one of your belongings, in this case. There are ways to be a loving and giving person without allowing rudeness. Would you have given the phone to her if she had asked nicely and made her case more reasonably?