Was my marriage a sacrament?

[matthewr]

My wife and I were having problems prior to our wedding and the pressure of the wedding itself prevented us from being able to work through everything in time. Nonetheless, we ended up going through with it because of all of the $ and all of the other people that would have been impacted, etc. Certainly not the right reason to get married. Since that time we have been able to step back and work through our issues with counseling and couldn’t be happier. However, we were recently discussing whether or not our marriage was valid or sacramental given that at the time of the wedding neither of us was in the position to be able to say our wedding vows without reservation and with absolute conviction and just felt pressure to go through with it. So my question is was our marriage valid/sacramental? If not, how would we be able to make it such? Thanks.

 

[Della]

matthewr:

My wife and I were having problems prior to our wedding and the pressure of the wedding itself prevented us from being able to work through everything in time. Nonetheless, we ended up going through with it because of all of the $ and all of the other people that would have been impacted, etc. Certainly not the right reason to get married. Since that time we have been able to step back and work through our issues with counseling and couldn’t be happier. However, we were recently discussing whether or not our marriage was valid or sacramental given that at the time of the wedding neither of us was in the position to be able to say our wedding vows without reservation and with absolute conviction and just felt pressure to go through with it. So my question is was our marriage valid/sacramental? If not, how would we be able to make it such? Thanks.

If you are unsure, have a talk with your priest. If he feels you weren’t properly disposed to be married he might suggest you restate your wedding vows with him as witness, to erase all doubts. But, do talk to him and let him help you with this issue.

 

[stbruno]

If you are really concerned about that…and you were married before a priest or deacon…consider this. Now that your marriage is obviously stronger and healthier…on your anniversary, renew your marriage vows during a mass. I am sure graces will be showered upon you and your spouse. God bless you and your marriage.

We do marriage prep in our parish, and we always tell the couples, the sacrament of marriage is not a sacrament you received once and once only on your wedding day, but rather a daily recommittment to the vows you made years before. Just like the Eucharist or reconciliation whose graces we receive over and over, marriage is the same way. Pray always and pray always for your spouse, because the sign of a true faithfilled life is one where your ultimate goal is to see that your spouse gets to heaven along with you.