Wedding Toast Ideas

  • Thread starter Thread starter Darran
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
D

Darran

Guest
Again CAF, I ask for advice :o

I have to prepare a toast for my sisters wedding this Saturday. There are just some sliiiiiiight complications. I want to give a bit of a pep talk to her and I have a vague idea of what I want to say. She is born and raised a Catholic but wasn’t too serious about it. Now she is gradually heading towards the Church and has improved in many ways over the past years. I want to congratulate her on that and approve of the valid marriage, yet at the same time “point upwards” so to speak, for her to continue on her way towards virtue.

That isn’t the difficult bit, though. I will likely be the only one saying a speech as there is no best man. I don’t particularly know anything about the other family apart from that they are very quiet and have been maybe a little bit strange last we have met them. But skipping that, some of them almost undoubtedly share quite a bigotry to Catholicism and Irish culture. Whats more, the place where the the reception is being held isn’t exactly too friendly of a neighbourhood to us either, so I just have to be careful. They can be offended all they want at me, its my sisters wedding and not theirs, but I have to make sure I can make it out in one piece.

Sort of a difficult thing to ask, but any tips on what I could say? Any help is much appreciated!
 
Where the heck do you live? I suggest that you speak from the heart and welcome the gentleman into your family. If you don’t know anything about the family, that’s about all you can say. I wouldn’t mention their weirdness, presumed bigotry, or the fact that they live in a violent neighborhood. You might ask your sister why she’s marrying into such an interesting combination. They you can say, “My sister’s told me all about mama’s delicious tamale casserole and how daddy always called his little girl “sugar lamb”. I know she will be welcomed lovingly into your family.” (Or insert whatever you can get out of your sister.)
 
Allegra said:
Where the heck do you live? I suggest that you speak from the heart and welcome the gentleman into your family. If you don’t know anything about the family, that’s about all you can say. I wouldn’t mention their weirdness, presumed bigotry, or the fact that they live in a violent neighborhood. You might ask your sister why she’s marrying into such an interesting combination. They you can say, “My sister’s told me all about mama’s delicious tamale casserole and how daddy always called his little girl “sugar lamb”. I know she will be welcomed lovingly into your family.” (Or insert whatever you can get out of your sister.)
Click to expand...
Haha good thinking. Will do, thank you.

Well, the “presumed” bigotry isn’t really all that presumed. Protestants here tend to be more sincere than protestants elsewhere, they don’t care much for God, they just enjoy the bigotry. Thats the majority, anyway. It’s not so much where they live, just where the reception is being held.

I’m just pretty nervous, as soon as I even slightly mention God the majority of the place will be against me, but if I know my sister a good speech would mean the world to her and really help bring her home. I just hope I can put some successful jokes in here and there and break the ice about it.

EDIT: I’ve just seen your own thread too Allegra, all the best on your own wedding 👍
 
Darran said:
Haha good thinking. Will do, thank you.

Well, the “presumed” bigotry isn’t really all that presumed. Protestants here tend to be more sincere than protestants elsewhere, they don’t care much for God, they just enjoy the bigotry. Thats the majority, anyway. It’s not so much where they live, just where the reception is being held.

I’m just pretty nervous, as soon as I even slightly mention God the majority of the place will be against me, but if I know my sister a good speech would mean the world to her and really help bring her home. I just hope I can put some successful jokes in here and there and break the ice about it.

EDIT: I’ve just seen your own thread too Allegra, all the best on your own wedding 👍
Click to expand...
Jokes are always a good start! Everyone loves a good smile. It sounds like you’ve got a few prejudices of your own though. What makes you think your sister would marry into a family of violent Catholic-haters? If this was a legitimate problem, don’t you think you’ve had heard something about it by now? Why would your father want your sister to marry someone who hated her? I don’t get it. Maybe it isn’t as bad as you think. I know of a few good-hearted Protestants who would never dream of beating up a relative’s brother after a wedding reception.
 
Drink little or no alcohol before it is your turn to speak, if you have to say something humorous, tell a short but not humiliating story that you can make personally applicable to your sister or your sister and new brother-in-law–a story about how a particular trait of hers first showed itself in early childhood can be charming–do not say anything vulgar, do not say anything dismissive to any of their relatives or other guests, then tell your sister that your whole family loves her and is happy for her and tell your new brother-in-law that your family feels lucky to have him joining it. Then wish them all the best, and if you say “God bless you both”, the most hardened atheist will forgive you. For heaven’s sake, though, whatever you do, don’t take too long about it. Yours is not a central speaking part.

You can tell your sister anything important that doesn’t fit into those parameters in private.
 
Allegra said:
Jokes are always a good start! Everyone loves a good smile. It sounds like you’ve got a few prejudices of your own though. What makes you think your sister would marry into a family of violent Catholic-haters? If this was a legitimate problem, don’t you think you’ve had heard something about it by now? Why would your father want your sister to marry someone who hated her? I don’t get it. Maybe it isn’t as bad as you think. I know of a few good-hearted Protestants who would never dream of beating up a relative’s brother after a wedding reception.
Click to expand...
The Protestant/Catholic dynamic is quite a bit different over there. As Darran pointed out, though, it’s not so much of a religious issue as it is a social one.
 
This is the first I have ever heard of somebody in Ireland asking others for a toast or Blessing. My dear departed Irish uncle who came to the states and became a citizen had the absolute BEST toasts and always seemed to stand up to make an announcement. He did it with humor, sincerity, and truth. I have no real advice except just the thank you for making me think of him.
 
EasterJoy said:
Drink little or no alcohol before it is your turn to speak, if you have to say something humorous, tell a short but not humiliating story that you can make personally applicable to your sister or your sister and new brother-in-law–a story about how a particular trait of hers first showed itself in early childhood can be charming–do not say anything vulgar, do not say anything dismissive to any of their relatives or other guests, then tell your sister that your whole family loves her and is happy for her and tell your new brother-in-law that your family feels lucky to have him joining it. Then wish them all the best, and if you say “God bless you both”, the most hardened atheist will forgive you. For heaven’s sake, though, whatever you do, don’t take too long about it. Yours is not a central speaking part.

You can tell your sister anything important that doesn’t fit into those parameters in private.
Click to expand...
This.

A wedding toast is not the right place to give a public “pep talk” about someone’s personal faith journey. Let her share that information with the people she wants to. It’s not really yours to publicize.
 
Pink_Lemonade said:
This.

A wedding toast is not the right place to give a public “pep talk” about someone’s personal faith journey. Let her share that information with the people she wants to. It’s not really yours to publicize.
Click to expand...
You ought to take what I say a little less literally.

That is good to hear about your uncle Moore11! With a bit of luck I’ll do half as well.
 
I’d have a hard time deciding between, “to all the twenty children,” and, “to freedom lost.”
 
chevalier said:
I’d have a hard time deciding between, “to all the twenty children,” and, “to freedom lost.”
Click to expand...
When Thomas Merton entered the Trappist Monastery, he called it “the four walls of my new freedom.” That’s the way to look at. Parenthood is like that, only more so.

I wouldn’t put that quote into a toast to be enjoyed by a reception full of non-Catholics, though. You have to speak in a language that everyone present is likely to understand. Translate, as it were. There is plenty to say that anyone likely to be there could appreciate, and not enough time to say a fraction of that. I say: Skip the rest entirely.
 
Dacinom said:
Thank you for coming here and sharing your story! Please be assured of my prayers for a wonderful wedding!

Okay, personally I am not a fan of long wedding speeches…a toast is wonderful but in my opinion anything longer than a minute is getting long (just my opinion). You said that you wanted to mention your sisters faith journey and encourage her to “continue on her way towards virtue” I agree with another poster, this is something private to discuss with her alone. As a bride I would not want my personal faith journey as part of a public speech even if it was a nice speech!

If you are worried about “making it out in one piece” as you said, I am guessing that means you want to be cautious and not offend anyone. Keep it simple, tell them they make a wonderful couple, tell them you wish them all the best and everyone raise their glass and toast for a happy life to the bride and groom!" I have never heard anyone approach a best man or maid of honor and say “wow, I sure wish your speech was longer!!! hahahahaha” short and sweet the focus is on THEM not you so keep it short and don’t worry so much.
Click to expand...
Haha thanks for the tips. Don’t worry, I’m hardly intenting to give an actual pep talk, I meant to give encouragement. I think I have something substantial right now, but keep them comming if you can!
 
Darran,

You’re Irish - c’mon I’m certain you’ve got the “gift of gab” and possibly kissed the blarney stone a time or two … HECK! my Irish relatives didn’t even get to Ireland and they did very well when it came time to toasts. 😉

I’m certain you’ll do fine, but I’ll ask our Blessed Mother to be there w/ you, dearie.

👍
 
cradlecatholic5 said:
Darran,

You’re Irish - c’mon I’m certain you’ve got the “gift of gab” and possibly kissed the blarney stone a time or two … HECK! my Irish relatives didn’t even get to Ireland and they did very well when it came time to toasts. 😉

I’m certain you’ll do fine, but I’ll ask our Blessed Mother to be there w/ you, dearie.

👍
Click to expand...
You’re a star. Funny enough I am the only one in the family who hasn’t kissed the blarney stone, But it seemed to go pretty well! Our Lady was surely looking over me 😃
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top