I would recommend that you contact your parish priest and ask if you could talk to him. In the time between now and meeting with the priest, I would recommend:
- Having a good think about what you are doing, why and what you hope to achieve?
- How you think the above fits in with what you know about the Catholic faith.
- Think about the reactions on the forum.
- Pray to God for help and direction, a mind, heart, ears and eyes open to His truth.
Please read the above with the gentle caring tone that is intended
When you meet with the priest, please remember, he isn’t judging you, he is only seeing a lost lamb who needs to be reunited with the flock. If at the end of the meeting you are not fully convinced, ask if you can meet the priest again in a few days, so that you can think about it and receive further spiritual guidance (if needed) or the Sacrament of Reconciliation.
I know that being told that something is wrong or against Church teachings isn’t easy to take. Heaven knows, after I discovered that I was doing something wrong, it took a few months before it seeped fully into my heart and mind, so that I genuinely accepted the fact that I was sinning. Then and only then, could I repent and move on.
I can’t speak for anyone else on the Forum, but I know that I make many mistakes and am (in the words of Pope Francis) a sinner. So chin up, take courage and speak to the priest.
In the meanwhile, I will pray for you.