What can I do in the face of my roommate's sinful behavior?

[Sigma]

If possible, I would like Father Serpa to respond to this (and a response at all would be great… I could really use some help)

I go back to school in a couple weeks, and my roommate is a good friend of mine. I love him to death. He belongs to the Catholic Church; he’s a convert, as I am. However, he is sort of… falling away, I could say. He engages in a number of activities that are directly in opposition to Church teaching, and this leads me into the dilemma I’m going to be facing shortly:

To what extent am I obligated to remind him of the moral law which the Church teaches? I know it is my responsibility to make sure he understands Church teaching on certain things, and I am happy to do this… but how far shall I go? For instance, I know for a fact that my friend regularly engages in premarital sex with his girlfriend. He is aware of the Church’s stance in this area. And I’m sure that, now and then, he will want to use our dorm room for that end.

He maintains a degree of shame at his actions, for this and for other things. Yet he still does them. And I wish to help him, but I really don’t know what I should do. So essentially, my question is: how can I deal with this situation? What can I do to help him? What am I obligated to do? What if he is obstinate?

Keep in mind that getting another roommate is not an option at this point, and even if it was, I probably would not elect to do so (I wouldn’t want to abandon him, you see).

What would you have me do?

 

[Fr.Vincent_Serpa]

Ok Sigma,

Here goes. Start spending an hour before the Blessed Sacrament every day. The Eucharist doesn’t have to be exposed. Sitting before the tabernacle is fine. He is still there. Reflect on the Lord’s agony in His mind as well as in His body. Thank Him for the rejection He suffered: betrayed by Judas, denied by Peter and abandoned by the rest. Thank Him for the brutal scourging that He endured that devastated His strong body and the loss of blood that gave Him a splitting headache. Thank Him for the crown of thorns that intensified the pain in His head. Thank Him for agony He felt hanging as His up-stretched arms squeezed His lungs and He had to push down on His crucified feet to lift His body enough to fill His lungs with air. Thank Him for the moment when His strength completely left Him and He suffocated, giving us His life. Picture His agonized face as He died and know that you are truly before it. Do this each day and you will not only know what to do for your friend, you will have the strength to do it—whether it means telling him that you will be praying the rosary for him while he sins or bringing Him with you when you go before the Blessed Sacrament. Allow your roomy’s weakness to be an occasion of grace for the both of you. Sigma, this works. It positively works! His love for the both of you is that powerful. I trust that you are man enough to do it. Let me know how things go. I will be praying too.

Fr. Vincent Serpa, O.P.