Why are you treating this like it is already a
fait accompli about which you can do nothing? If your daughter is still a minor, you can insist she go with you to a crisis pregnancy center for counseling; you can insist she speak with a priest whose orthodoxy you trust (hopefully your pastor); you can refuse to have anything to do with paying for the abortion or arranging for her transportation to the abortion clinic. You are her mother and she needs you to act as her mother, and not as someone easily cowed by a teenager’s misplaced assertion of will. I’m certain she is not just being willful, but is also frightened and vulnerable, and that is all the more reason why she needs you to be strong and protective.
Granted, the laws are such these days that your daughter may be able to have this abortion despite your best efforts to prevent it. If she does, then you are not morally culpable for the abortion. But that does not relieve you of the moral responsibility to what is possible, just, and moral to prevent this from happening. Do your best and leave the rest to God. And, of course, if she manages to have the abortion, she will need you to help her with the physical, emotional, and spiritual consequences of her action.
I recommend that you call your diocese immediately and ask for information on what pro-life resources are available in your area, both for crisis pregnancies and for post-abortion healing in case, God forbid, your daughter succeeds. The resources linked below may also be helpful. You, your daughter, and your grandchild are in our prayers. God bless.
Recommended resources:
Birthright
Project Rachel