What should I do for my mom?

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Miraculous_Medal

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Good evening everyone, my name is Kevin, 25, and I have an issue with my mom.

I feel like my mom has gone astray from the Catholic faith.
What should I tell/do for her? She rarely fulfills Sunday obligation. She has work on Sunday at 3pm but she can fully make time to go to mass even go to Saturday vigil.
Things she says:
  1. After confronting her not to eat meat on Fridays during lent: slight pause that is just a belief
  2. No need for images (iconoclast)
  3. Is it heresy for her to tell me, as long as you’re a good person doing good things etc etc We still need to fulfill our obligations as Catholics right? Faith without good Works is dead.
  4. Why bless this house? (after me arranging a house blessing, she says the priest is just a man still). I responded that the priest is a witness of the Church who intercedes for us for God’s blessing.
I thought it was parents are the ones to nurture the faith and not diminish it for their children. I wouldn’t want to blame my mom for this, but I have a feeling my mom’s attitude towards the Catholic faith rubbed off on my sister, who does not practise at all anymore. My sister lives by herself.

Ever since I had a big conversion 2 years ago, I became a revert. I try to be a better witness, but every time I try to confront my mom about Catholic issues, she just brushes it off and makes an excuse.

Advice would be appreciated,
Yours in Christ,
Kevin

PS. Mom watches only Joyce Meyers on youtube
 
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Sometimes it is better to say less rather than more. It may be that your ‘pushing’ the faith on her makes her push back more.
It may be that Joyce Meyer makes sense to her now, but she may well turn back to the faith in time.
 
I haven’t made much progress with my own mother, unfortunately. The best thing you can do, I think, is to fully live out the faith in yourself, allowing yourself to be a light for others.

May your behavior and your conversation be such that everyone who sees or hears you can say: “This man reads the life of Jesus Christ.” Saint Josemaria Escriva
 
Yes that is what I was thinking, living it out.
I’m worried at judgement when Jesus condemns me for not trying hard enough for their conversion.
 
Continue to make the right choices and be an example to her. Pray for her. In time she will warm up to the faith.
 
Miraculous_Medal said:
Yes that is what I was thinking, living it out.
I’m worried at judgement when Jesus condemns me for not trying hard enough for their conversion.
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Continue to offer her correction whenever she speaks against the Church. Beyond that, there’s not much you can do. It’s the Holy Spirit who has the heavy lifting to do.
 
Hi Kevin,
You are a good son.

1.Love your mom. Let her know you love her.
2. Pray for her, include her in your rosary intentions.
3. Let her have her spiritual space and instead continue to be a good example for her.
4.Concentrate on building your relationship with God and his Holy Mother and share your concerns with them.
 
hi kevin,

I understand your struggles, my parents are pretty much in a similar boat. over the years, things have slowly improved but it’s still not quite there yet.

but at the end of the day, as much as we want them to obtain salvation, it’s their free choice. we can’t force them to pray, or go to church, it’s something that have to want todo for themselves.

pray hard, offer sacrifices for her concversion, dont’ “confront” her, that is likely off putting. parents especially, don’t tend to respond well to correction or criticism from their own children, generally. offer a gentle comment if she says something inaccurate, if it’s possible, invite her to mass with you nicely, orto some other social event if your parish has them.
people have to truly know god first and understand his relationship to his church. until they really start to love God, then all they wil see is that the church has all these “rules”.
 
I’m a mom (60+).

A lot of moms and dads go through a second “adolescence” as we struggle to get used to being “old.” We get rebellious (just like teenagers!). We start getting aches and pains, and sometimes we get diagnosed with conditions that require meds, surgery, therapy, or all.

We get lonely and scared as we see our friends getting ill and dying, and we realize that we, too, have a limited lifespan.

And we start questioning our faith. Is this REALLY the Way, the Truth, and the Life? Does Jesus REALLY care? Is the Catholic Church REALLY Christ’s Church?

We wonder why we haven’t gotten further in our faith. Many of us are still struggling with the same sins we’ve struggled with since our teen years. Many of us still don’t have a daily “Quiet Time” or say prayers throughout the day. And many of us don’t really do that much in the way of Christian service.

We see the Evangelical Protestants having such a good time with their praise and worship, their Bible studies and prayer meetings, their concerts and gospel meetings, the fellowships and friendship circles, and their conventions, speakers’ rallies, etc. And we wonder if we are missing out.

The BEST witness to older people is older people. When “kids” try to tell them what to believe, the older one will think (or say!), “Easy for you to talk. You still have your knees (or ears or sight or dreams or…!).”

Keep loving your mom and praying for her, and leave her faith alone. She doesn’t have to conform to your idea of what a godly Catholic woman should act like to be “Catholic” and safe in the Arms of Jesus. She’ll find her way back–it might look different than the way she was when she was raising you. But she’ll get there.
 
Thank you for the kind responses everyone! I will continue to pray and make sacrifices for my mom. Have a blessed day and may God bless you all. ❤️
 
You love her, you pray for her, you are kind and joyful when you speak to her, you don’t lecture her.
 
Your mom needs a new heart. A refreshing by God. Like what you received.
Pray for her and be a joy to her.
I prayed for my dad for decades and when he turned 79 he was diagnosed with cancer. He called me and asked me to pick him up to go to church. I cried. It was a long wait but God is looking for that moment to work in your mom’s heart. He’s patient and long suffering, abounding in mercy.

I am so glad you have come home to the church! God bless you.
 
That is very sweet!

Me and my mom were having a small argument the sacramentals around the house. She kept saying that’s only for church etc, get rid of them.

Then I blurted out don’t be demonic, mom 🤭 oops

I hid a green scapular in her purse for Our Lady’s intercession
 
If you already tried to telling her the importance of following Christ and she does not listen then all you can do is pray for her. You are both in my prayers.
 
Miraculous_Medal said:
I thought it was parents are the ones to nurture the faith and not diminish it for their children. I wouldn’t want to blame my mom for this, but I have a feeling my mom’s attitude towards the Catholic faith rubbed off on my sister, who does not practise at all anymore. My sister lives by herself.
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As the girl in the family my mom has the strongest desire for me to consider all the “negativity” that comes with our faith. As a paradox and not just to be against her I always found comfort in Christianity and at Church. I asked her to please leave it be, because I don’t want faith in Christ to be divisive between us. Eventually she let me be more or less. Direct confrontation never worked. Silent prayer worked better and sometimes she is softer in her atheist views and I let her be.
I worry she may die and not even call a priest for her confession. I also worry she will ask to be incinerated (she did ask that, I said once yes, once the other way around) this is something EO does not approve of even though I may find a priest to hold a small funeral sermon for her. Lol, I worry about stuff most parents worry about themselves at old age. Maybe this counts for something.
If you can convince her ok, if not you are not obliged. The more I prayed for this, the more I feel that it is parents duty to take the children to Jesus (which your mom did, and mine, we got baptized) and then spiritual responsibility for the education in faith the Church teaches it belongs to the godparents. If you feel up to it try to convince her but I read in the history of the church not even saints could convince their parents otherwise many times.
I think you owe her respect for her being your parent, but are not responsible for her soul. Pray for her and ask for help for peace in your family (Archangel Gabriel, St. Anne, St. Joseph).
 
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