holly3278—
oh, holly, i am so sorry beyond words that you’re suffering so much right now. please know that there is hope, healing and restoration available in God, Who loves you so much more than you could ever imagine and hurts when you hurt, and longs so deeply to bring you into peace and joy and hope once more in Him. i have experienced my own darkness, and i am extremely open about all that i’ve felt and experienced in my own suffering, so if you’d ever like to talk to me about it, i’d be more than happy to share with you about all that i’ve been through myself over the past few years. to give a brief summary, i fell into depression and homosexuality at the age of twelve (i am now sixteen), and over the next few years, i struggled with severe and recurrent major depression, severe anxiety, social phobia, traits of borderline personality disorder, self-destructive tendencies, self-harm and suicide, including a nearly fatal attempt that only left me unscathed because God intervened with a miracle. i have been hospitalized three times for depression, anxiety, symptoms of mild anorexia, self-harm and suicide, most recently for four and a half months from march to august 2007. yet everything changed completely and forever when i repented of all my serious sins and gave my heart to Jesus on november 22, 2007, which was the beginning of a journey through faith to the Catholic Faith once more, after i spent a year as a nondenominational evangelical Christian that involved many vicious satanic attacks that almost caused me to relapse back into darkness many times. if you’d like to hear the rest of my testimony, please don’t hesitate to ask me—i am extremely open about my faith and my experiences, in the hope and prayer that sharing what i’ve gone through and how God has saved, healed and restored me from so much will inspire and encourage others to reach out and take that same love, mercy, forgiveness, hope, healing and restoration that He longs so much to give to them. holly, God loves you so much more than you could ever know here on earth, and i know He longs so much to heal and restore you. i’m so sorry that i don’t really have much advice i could give you—but i can pray for you, and let you know that there is hope forever and completely in God. i can’t tell you enough how He loves you and watches over you. please know that just as God transformed my heart and life forever, He can do the same for you. again, i am very open about my story, and i hope and pray that it would be able to inspire and encourage you—so if you’d ever like to hear the rest of my testimony, please don’t hesitate to contact me. there’s nothing too personal you could ask, and nothing you could ask that would offend me.
let me just pray for you right now, holly:
Heavenly Father, i just lift up holly to you now, in the deepest prayer that You would heal her of her darkness and pain and restore her completely and forever back to Yourself in hope, healing and light. i pray that You would destroy all influences of darkness in her life and heal her of any and all darkness that may have infiltrated her soul. i pray that You would rebuke any powers of darkness that may be influencing her, and cause them to leave her life completely and never come back. i pray, Lord, that You would bless holly, and pour out Your Love and light upon her, and bring her out of the darkness close to Yourself in Love and hope. i pray that You would heal her of all that is afflicting her, and replace the darkness in her life with the hope, life and light that comes only from Your Presence that i pray would fill her life to overflowing with relief and restoration. i pray that You would strengthen holly to overcome all of the darkness in her life, completely and forever, and that once the darkness leaves, it would never come back. replace her depression with joy, her despair with hope and any sin with Your forgiveness, and bring her close to Yourself, in the mighty, precious Name of Jesus, through the glorious intercession of our Blessed Mother, Mary, Amen. thank you, Lord, for hearing and answering my prayer, and for all that You did to save me from my own darkness, Amen.
holly, it takes a lot of courage, bravery and strength to reach out for help, and i admire you so much for it. please know that you are loved, and that you are far from alone. God is always with you, and we are always here supporting you and cheering you on. please stay strong, please stay safe and please take care of yourself. God bless you, holly, and please take care, and please be sure to update us as to how you’re doing. and remember—i’m always here and will always care, so feel free to contact me anytime.
love,
in the peace and love of Christ,
alison xx
