What to do?

[Patient_One]

Hi,

My boyfriend of 2 and half years was baptized as Roman Catholic as an infant, but his parents converted to Baptist when whe was a young child. He was never confirmed. If he were to convert back to be a Catholic, is he still required to take the RCIA classes? Isn’t it that if an individual is baptized as a Catholic, he/she is always a Catholic? If that’s the case, would he just need to confess his sins to a priest and can start going to church and communion? His birth certificate says that he is Roman Catholic.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Hi,

My boyfriend of 2 and half years was baptized as Roman Catholic as an infant, but his parents converted to Baptist when whe was a young child. He was never confirmed. If he were to convert back to be a Catholic, is he still required to take the RCIA classes? Isn’t it that if an individual is baptized as a Catholic, he/she is always a Catholic? If that’s the case, would he just need to confess his sins to a priest and can start going to church and communion? His birth certificate says that he is Roman Catholic.

A person Baptized by a Catholic is a Catholic. However the Sacraments of Initiation are three in number, Baptism, Confirmation and Holy Communion. he has only received one of them. It is possible that a parish near where he lives has an Adult Sacramental process, separate from RCIA, but it is highly unlikely. Most parishes use the RCIA as this process. He of course would be a Candidate (already Baptized) instead of a Catechumen. He will need to obtain a currect (less than two year old) Baptismal certificate from the parish where he was Baptized. Generally he can just stop by and ask for a copy or call.

 

[Patient_One]

Kindly provide more info on the Adult Sacramental process. What’s the difference between this and the RCIA?

Thank you in advance.

 

[kage_ar]

Kindly provide more info on the Adult Sacramental process. What’s the difference between this and the RCIA?

Thank you in advance.

In every Parish I know, the only difference is the participation in some of the public Rites - the Rite of Election for example.

They attend the same classes, have the same instruction…

They are not baptized at the Easter Vigil - they stay seated during the baptisms and then are called forward for Confirmation during the Vigil.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Kindly provide more info on the Adult Sacramental process. What’s the difference between this and the RCIA?

Thank you in advance.

An Adult Sacamental Process would be a series of instructions, Days of Reflection/Retreats for people Baptized as infants in the Catholic Church but then never received any other Sacraments, they are both Catholic and Christian. They may also have received First Holy Communion but not Confirmation.

RCIA is primarily for Adults (over 7-8) who are Not Christians, have never been Baptized and which to become Christians. A secondary purpose for RCIA is for Baptized non-Catholic Christians who wish to become Catholic. To do so they pass through a series of Liturgical Rites.

 

[w2bp88]

I, like your boyfriend, was baptized Catholic but I did not continue after that. I have to go through the same RCIA process as those who haven’t been but there is a distinction. I am a Candidate and they are Catechumens. We still learn the same thing every week and go through the same rituals, the difference is that they will be baptized and I won’t. He is considered a Catholic due to his baptism but he needs to go through RCIA to receive communion. (Or that’s what I’ve been told and what I have to do)

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

I, like your boyfriend, was baptized Catholic but I did not continue after that. I have to go through the same RCIA process as those who haven’t been but there is a distinction. I am a Candidate and they are Catechumens. We still learn the same thing every week and go through the same rituals, the difference is that they will be baptized and I won’t. He is considered a Catholic due to his baptism but he needs to go through RCIA to receive communion. (Or that’s what I’ve been told and what I have to do)

If I were to create an Adult process in a parish. Preparation after an interview and maybe a few Inquiry weeks (to get paperwork and documents together) would be a 4-6 week preparation for Reconciliation with the opportunity for First Reconciliation, another 4 to 6 weeks for First Holy Communion with reception of Holy Communion at a parish Mass, then another 4-6 weeks for preparation for Confirmation maybe with a trip to the Bishop to be Confirmed. Included in this would be elements of Liturgy, the Mass, Prayer, Morality, Sacraments in General, etc. The key however would be the need for an on-going Adult Catechesis/Catechism program for the whole parish. It need not take place at the parish but could take place in homes, in small groups.

 

[fdesales]

If I were to create an Adult process in a parish. Preparation after an interview and maybe a few Inquiry weeks (to get paperwork and documents together) would be a 4-6 week preparation for Reconciliation with the opportunity for First Reconciliation, another 4 to 6 weeks for First Holy Communion with reception of Holy Communion at a parish Mass, then another 4-6 weeks for preparation for Confirmation maybe with a trip to the Bishop to be Confirmed. Included in this would be elements of Liturgy, the Mass, Prayer, Morality, Sacraments in General, etc. The key however would be the need for an on-going Adult Catechesis/Catechism program for the whole parish. It need not take place at the parish but could take place in homes, in small groups.

LOL!

RCIA is already short-handed in most parishes, as it is… My parish has very little in the way of adult education, so I even allow these people to come to the Thursday evening classes, as they can learn more of their faith. It’s hard to turn people away who want to learn about their faith. I tell them, though, not to scandalize the candidates/catechumens with any sort of hidden agenda they may have (like female priests - I had one lady one year make it a point to bring this up and I had to defend the Church’s stance in front of the class. Now, I tell people to bring up such issues in private for the sake of the “weaker brothers and sisters”). So far, fully initiated Catholics (including sponsors) are appreciative of having SOMETHING available to learn more about their faith. They do not participate in dismissals or any rites/blessings for the candidate/catechumens, of course.

Regards

 

[Patient_One]

My boyfriend’s situation is unique to me.

He has gone to a private Catholic school all the way up to Highschool (because of good education system). Does this count for anything? I know it would have been mandatory to take religion classes for 3 years (courses: Salvation History, Christ, Church, and The Sacraments of Initiation and Christian Morality) in order to pass the grade and move on to the next in order to graduate.

Would all these information be weighed in during the interview session to determine the next course of action in order for him to be iniated back to be a Catholic?

 

[fdesales]

My boyfriend’s situation is unique to me.

He has gone to a private Catholic school all the way up to Highschool (because of good education system). Does this count for anything? I know it would have been mandatory to take religion classes for 3 years (courses: Salvation History, Christ, Church, and The Sacraments of Initiation and Christian Morality) in order to pass the grade and move on to the next in order to graduate.

What matters in this situation is whether he was baptized or raised as a Catholic, not whether he went to a Catholic school. If he was already Catholic, received Holy Communion, and took high school classes, all he would need to do is to go to Confession, if even that was necessary, and he would be good in the eyes of the Church. If he had not received Communion (some Protestant parents send their children to Catholic schools but do not convert), then we (RCIA) would try to formulate some personal program - if we were able to, with our limited manpower. I would certainly be as flexible as I could.

Would all these information be weighed in during the interview session to determine the next course of action in order for him to be iniated back to be a Catholic?

Sounds like you are saying “initiated back”, which would not be necessary. We call these “re-verts” or reverting back to the faith. I did this, as well. All that is required is Confession, sister. We would know for sure in an interview with the inquirer.

Regards

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

My boyfriend’s situation is unique to me.

He has gone to a private Catholic school all the way up to Highschool (because of good education system). Does this count for anything? I know it would have been mandatory to take religion classes for 3 years (courses: Salvation History, Christ, Church, and The Sacraments of Initiation and Christian Morality) in order to pass the grade and move on to the next in order to graduate.

Would all these information be weighed in during the interview session to determine the next course of action in order for him to be iniated back to be a Catholic?

Probably not because we are looking for an ADULT understanding of the faith, not a child’s.

 

[fdesales]

Probably not because we are looking for an ADULT understanding of the faith, not a child’s.

Brother,

That is a tough call to make, Brother, one where the interviewer judges during the interview. Much depends on what is said and things that this lady has not said, like how old this person was, for example.

Because many Catholics don’t have an “adult” understanding of the faith (I’m being honest), I would certainly consider that he has already heard the Gospel and a fuller explanation given, much more than most. Perhaps the interview would divulge that level where he is at, knowledge-wise.

True, he may not have experienced Christ so much in the Sacraments - and thus, I would stress this during the interview and get him (if that was the case) to go through the process for that sake, reminding him that Catholicism is about experiencing Christ through the sacraments, not about memorizing knowledge…

Such things are not so black and white, I guess.

Respectfully,

fdesales

 

[Patient_One]

Sorry for the typo. Yes, I meant “initiated”.

Here’s additonal information: He was 16 years old when he graduated highschool. He studied and passed all of his religion classes, but did not participate in receiving communion and was not confirmed.

 

[fdesales]

Sorry for the typo. Yes, I meant “initiated”.

Here’s additonal information: He was 16 years old when he graduated highschool. He studied and passed all of his religion classes, but did not participate in receiving communion and was not confirmed.

I don’t know enough about his situation, nor have I spoken with him personally - that is where I would make my ultimate decision. However, based on what you have said, I would strongly urge that he go through RCIA as a candidate. We have found by experience that Holy Communion reception is a good cut-off point for those deciding where to go. If he was not confirmed, but received Communion, I would leave it up to him to decide to take the longer RCIA road, and its inherent spiritual benefits, or the shorter Confirmation classes. No Communion, then we direct them to RCIA, with the exception of especially mature Christians who are able to demonstrate they have already been walking in Christ through experience.

Again, RCIA is not meant to be book knowledge learning, but learning about Christ through the sacraments. If he has not experienced the sacraments, he has learned nothing on this subject yet (I presume he was baptized as an infant).

Regards

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

I don’t know enough about his situation, nor have I spoken with him personally - that is where I would make my ultimate decision. However, based on what you have said, I would strongly urge that he go through RCIA as a candidate. We have found by experience that Holy Communion reception is a good cut-off point for those deciding where to go. If he was not confirmed, but received Communion, I would leave it up to him to decide to take the longer RCIA road, and its inherent spiritual benefits, or the shorter Confirmation classes. No Communion, then we direct them to RCIA, with the exception of especially mature Christians who are able to demonstrate they have already been walking in Christ through experience.

Again, RCIA is not meant to be book knowledge learning, but learning about Christ through the sacraments. If he has not experienced the sacraments, he has learned nothing on this subject yet (I presume he was baptized as an infant).

Regards

RCIA is not only Sacraments or book knowledge. RCIA incorporates many different elements including Liturgical (Mass, prayer,community), Catechetical (Catechism of the Catholic Church, lives of the Saints, Fathers of the Church), Rites (Sacraments, Sacramentals, Blessings) Scripture (BOW), Moral life.

 

[fdesales]

RCIA is not only Sacraments or book knowledge. RCIA incorporates many different elements including Liturgical (Mass, prayer,community), Catechetical (Catechism of the Catholic Church, lives of the Saints, Fathers of the Church), Rites (Sacraments, Sacramentals, Blessings) Scripture (BOW), Moral life.

Yes, the Rite books mentions Catechetical, Liturgical, Apostolic and Moral “instruction”, and the classroom environment can only touch on some of these in a limited fashion. Thus, sponsors are so important to the process. I guess we agree that RCIA is not just about lectures, correct?

Regards

 

[Patient_One]

I have to have a talk with my boyfriend about this. I pray that God will touch his heart and lead him back to home to the Catholic Church. Kindly pray for his him as well.

 

[Patient_One]

Hello again,

I’m getting a sense from my boyfriend that he doesn’t want to convert back to RC. We’ve talked about the subject in the early stage of our relationship and I have cried in most of those occassions.

My boyfriend thinks that that there is no big difference between being a Baptist versus being RC. The only difference is what he calls “traditions”. He has indicated to me that he grows more in his Baptist faith. It makes sense to him better than RC and it is very practical way to live.

After talking about conversion off and on with him, I got tired of bringing up the subject and stopped talking about it completely and just prayed about it. I realized that I can’t make him feel that I’m forcing him to convert. I want him to realize for himself and I can just lead by example --how I never fail to go to church on Sundays and I also pray the rosary on a daily basis.

He recently stopped going to church or at least missed a lot of church, either because he was busy or sleeps in. I’m thinking of inviting him to go with me to Church, but I’m afraid that he will say no to me.

I don’t want to wait forever (I dont’ think I can) for his realization of converion. But, I feel like if I talk to him now, I would just force him. How do approach him about this? I feel tired and I’m longing for someone who shares the same faith as me.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Hello again,

I’m getting a sense from my boyfriend that he doesn’t want to convert back to RC. We’ve talked about the subject in the early stage of our relationship and I have cried in most of those occassions.

My boyfriend thinks that that there is no big difference between being a Baptist versus being RC. The only difference is what he calls “traditions”. He has indicated to me that he grows more in his Baptist faith. It makes sense to him better than RC and it is very practical way to live.

After talking about conversion off and on with him, I got tired of bringing up the subject and stopped talking about it completely and just prayed about it. I realized that I can’t make him feel that I’m forcing him to convert. I want him to realize for himself and I can just lead by example --how I never fail to go to church on Sundays and I also pray the rosary on a daily basis.

He recently stopped going to church or at least missed a lot of church, either because he was busy or sleeps in. I’m thinking of inviting him to go with me to Church, but I’m afraid that he will say no to me.

I don’t want to wait forever (I dont’ think I can) for his realization of converion. But, I feel like if I talk to him now, I would just force him. How do approach him about this? I feel tired and I’m longing for someone who shares the same faith as me.

You do need to tend to yourself and your faith first, maybe it requires that you re-examine the relationship.

 

[Lutheranteach]

Another example of: A man hopes the woman in his life will remain as she is when they meet. The woman, always thinks she can change the man to being what she thinks he should be.