What would YOU do?

[EasterJoy]

My MIL lived with us. It was wonderful, and yet I would be very careful about not abusing how close your parents/in-laws are. Grandparents hate to say “no,” because they don’t want to seem to be rejecting their grandchildren. Still, they worked hard as parents. Better that they have a very easy time saying “this is not a good time” or “yes, sometimes, but not so often as this.” (And maybe you already have that–I hope so!)

Having said that, I’d stay close, if at all possible. It will not be so many years, and it will be you who are taking care of the grandparents. The less they feel they are inconveniencing you by accepting your help, the better. As close as you are, even grade school aged children could be a very big help to grandparents recovering from a surgery or even home-bound on a longer-term basis. That will make it a very good thing that the children can get to Grandma and Grandpa’s without needing a driver, that they can shovel the walk when it snows or trot over with a few groceries you picked up while you put the rest away in your own kitchen. This arrangement will probably also ensure that those parents can stay in their own home for as long as possible and with the least disruption to the routines at your house.

 

[oldgraymare2]

You live three houses away from your parents with your husband and two young children and another child is in the plan.

Your relationship with your parents is excellent. They babysit the kids while you work as well as when you come home. You are constantly walking back and forth between the houses and it’s fabulous for everyone! Need a shower? Need 15 min to get the laundry folded? Need to dash to the store for a coulple of things? Kids melting down? Grammie will be there in a second. Or, shoo the kids out the door and watch them run down the sidewalk into Grammie’s waiting arms.

Your dilemma: you hate the floor plan of your home. It is a typical two story home with four bedrooms. The master bathroom isn’t great and the eating area of the kitchen is small. You have always dreamed of an open floor plan and there is an opportunity to build one in a neighborhood that is under a five minute drive away from your parents.

Would you stay in your current home or move?

Like the others have said, you can’t get that time back with your parents, so I would stay for now.

I am also speaking from personal experience, as someone who grew up like your children right now, being close to my maternal Gramma.

We actually lived with her. First in her house with her when I was very young for the first few years of my life, and then when she bought a duplex where she lived in one half, and my parents, sister and I lived in the the other half of it.

I adored her, and I had a very close personal relationship with her until she passed away. I would not have traded that time growing up with her for anything.

 

[AdamP88]

You live three houses away from your parents with your husband and two young children and another child is in the plan.

Your relationship with your parents is excellent. They babysit the kids while you work as well as when you come home. You are constantly walking back and forth between the houses and it’s fabulous for everyone! Need a shower? Need 15 min to get the laundry folded? Need to dash to the store for a coulple of things? Kids melting down? Grammie will be there in a second. Or, shoo the kids out the door and watch them run down the sidewalk into Grammie’s waiting arms.

Your dilemma: you hate the floor plan of your home. It is a typical two story home with four bedrooms. The master bathroom isn’t great and the eating area of the kitchen is small. You have always dreamed of an open floor plan and there is an opportunity to build one in a neighborhood that is under a five minute drive away from your parents.

Would you stay in your current home or move?

I’d move. That’s too close to my parents for my liking (no offence mom).

Seriously though, 5 mins is nothing.

 

[SuperHappy]

I would stay right where I was if I were in your position! I would adore living that close to my parents!

The time your children are spending with their grandparents is something that can never ever be replaced.

And don’t forget that your parents are getting older and will be needing care themselves, possibly sooner than you can imagine. Being closer in that case is better as it will help them maintain their independence. Even 5 minutes away can seem an eternity in an emergency.

And as the posters above have said, open floor plans are harder to live with than you think. They are also not as cost efficient for heat and air conditioning (telling you this from personal experience).

 

[EasterJoy]

I’d move. That’s too close to my parents for my liking (no offence mom).

Seriously though, 5 mins is nothing.

This is not for everybody, but this couple already lives a few doors down and likes it.

The day will come when Grandma and Grandpa should not be driving. Better to have them three doors down when they need to give up their driving privileges permanently.

 

[ThePCWife]

Also, a five minute drive is more like 10-20 minutes each way because you have to get everyone ready for a car ride and it does take longer than getting ready for a walk.

So it inevitably turns into something you avoid a lot more than a five minute walk.

 

[Irishmom2]

Also, a five minute drive is more like 10-20 minutes each way because you have to get everyone ready for a car ride and it does take longer than getting ready for a walk.

So it inevitably turns into something you avoid a lot more than a five minute walk.

Good point!

 

[Moneyball]

I’d stay and renovate the house as best as I could.