What would you tell/recommend an ex-Catholic

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FallenCatholic

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Hello.

It’s been a long time. I’m not even sure if this is the right part of the forum for this conversation.

I come here occasionally when I am having doubts. Y’all always seem to help me, as much as one can across the keyboard.

Backstory. I was raised Catholic, left the faith for Protestantism when I reached adulthood. Spent the next 20 years in a circular path between Catholicism and Protestantism. Today I am finding myself at the beginning of the swing into Catholicism. It is frustrating and tiring.

The last time this happened I actually went and spoke with my local priest. It was the first time we spoke really. I had been attending mass but you know you can go to Mass your entire life and not really interact with a priest depending on your personality. At least that has been my observation. So I told him of these struggles with the faith and how I’d been back and forth and his response was really quite shocking to me. He said it was ok if I was more comfortable as a Baptist and went on to tell me about a good baptist friend of his. Perhaps he was trying to be gentle to my confused spirit. I kinda feel like tough love would have been much better. I guess it could go either way.

So, what would you recommend to someone who constantly struggles with Catholicism and spent most of their adult life as a Baptist? What should I read? How should I pray? Who should I seek for answers? How long should I wait it out? Anything, I’m all ears.

I’m planning on hitting up a bookstore that could possibly have old books, any recommendations?

Also, is this the right spot to have Scriptural questions?

Thanks for reading and if you respond I appreciate it. Have a busy afternoon so I won’t be checking for replies until later this evening.

God bless!
 
You were raised Catholic, you have all the Sacraments. How about just starting to practice Catholicism. Mass, Sacrament of Reconcilliation, then share in the Eucharist. Pray the rosary , starting with today, it’s a huge day for the Rosary being 100th anniversary of Fatima.

Books will give us theory. At some point, to advance our education, we must put this theory into action.

So my advice is to attend Mass and the Sacrament. And start praying the Rosary. Ask Our Lady to bring you closer to her Son.

Don’t wait. Start doing. Stop procrastinating. Answer God’s call.

We are never ex Catholics. We are always catholic. You are and always have been and will be Catholic
 
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I have done that as part of my going back several times but it never sticks. That is why I thought if I came to terms with the doctrines maybe it would stick. Maybe my knowledge of why we do what we do is elementary being that I stopped being a full time practicing Catholic 20 years ago. Does that make sense?

It has been recommended that I study the early church fathers, are there actual book titles I can look into? Something that can give reinforcement to the practice?
 
You might want to see if it is possible to go thru the RCIA program just to relearn or learn what you don’t know. I don’t want this to turn into an argument, different parishes allow it or not, just ask at your parish.

I know you said it’s been 20 years, but depending on how old you were when the “bouncing” back and forth began, it makes a difference in when you might be more open to accepting the church once and for all. Be patient with yourself.
 
I was 19 when I stopped practicing my catholic faith. I started going to mass at some point a few years later then started having trouble when confronted with questions of “why do you do THAT” as a Catholic, from non Catholics. I am pretty much the only practicing anything in my life. So not having a strong network of other believers has been rough.
 
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If the priest told you it was fine to be a Baptist and you’re still feeling a pull towards Catholicism and posting stuff like this here, to me that’s saying the Holy Spirit is calling you back to the Church.

Just my 2 cents.
 
If you’d like my advice, I’d tell you to check out the online Baltimore Catechism (it isn’t just for kids) and go through it slowly. The thing is, I know it sounds like boring old ‘stuff I already knew" but. . .you need to have a foundation. You need to be so solid in your foundation before you start to ‘build’ that you don’t suddenly, in the midst of a prayer or a practice, start to wonder "why DO I do this’ or “but my protestant friends condemn this”, etc. If you start with the basics and learn them, really learn them, then it’s easier to move ‘on’. And when you do, I would recommend going to C.S. Lewis’ Mere Christianity (he’s Anglican and this will cover all the ‘basics’ as well, so you will feel less of a 'Catholic VERSUS non-Catholic, yet you won’t feel ‘pushed’ out of Catholic practices. Next I would suggest Catholicism for Dummies (by Father Triglio) which will not only help you with the major ‘talking points’ but which offers further studies that will help lead you along. Because you aren’t going to be questioning everything. Some of the teachings you’ll be ready to embrace right away, some of them will make sense for the most part, some might seem a little strange, and some you’ll be like, “Uh, wait, I need to know a LOT more before I get behind THIS”. . .and so you can move through at your own pace.

And of course as you go along I cannot recommend more highly saying a daily rosary (meditating on the mysteries. Look around and see whether you would prefer a Scriptural rosary, whether you’d like a CD, etc. Get some holy water and use it frequently. Look around (EWTN has a store) and get yourself a small inexpensive statue --Jesus the Good Shepherd, St. Michael, your name saint, the Blessed Mother–and keep it on your desk or bureau. Get some CDs of Catholic hymns. Visit fisheaters.com and check out their ‘Being Catholic" for ideas about older customs (you might already remember that the month of May is dedicated to Mary, but what about the month of June (Sacred Heart of Jesus?) All the months have a particular dedication for you to ponder each day. Kind of ‘steep’ yourself in Catholicism, keep "Jesus focused’. And God bless you.
 
I have thought that many times before. 😔

But it just never lasts. I always end up leaving again. I really think my misunderstanding of things may be making it harder for me to stay. Or the weight of trying to be a ‘good’ catholic, whatever good is, because I fail at that too.
 
That’s why you need to educate yourself and clear up any misunderstandings. Then you will be able to make a decision based upon what the Church actually believes.
 
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I agree with Irish mom. You need people, involvement in the catholic culture. RCIA would be ideal. Or another program offered at your Parish. Or join vinnies.

Just get involved. Meet people, interact with practicing catholics
 
FallenCatholic said:
It is frustrating and tiring.
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Why??
FallenCatholic said:
So, what would you recommend to someone who constantly struggles with Catholicism and spent most of their adult life as a Baptist?
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That would depend upon the nature of the struggle.
FallenCatholic said:
Also, is this the right spot to have Scriptural questions?
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You might get more relevant responses if you posted in the Scripture section.
FallenCatholic said:
Maybe my knowledge of why we do what we do is elementary being that I stopped being a full time practicing Catholic 20 years ago. Does that make sense?
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Absolutely. Most Catholics leave the Church because they have only a child level of religious education.
FallenCatholic said:
It has been recommended that I study the early church fathers, are there actual book titles I can look into? Something that can give reinforcement to the practice?
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The Fathers Know Best
FallenCatholic said:
Or the weight of trying to be a ‘good’ catholic, whatever good is, because I fail at that too.
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In that case, it sounds like you are suffering from poor catechesis. This is something that is easily mended if you learn about the faith into which you were baptized. RCIA was recommended and is a good idea.
 
I will keep your spiritual journey in my prayers
:pray:t2::pray:t2::pray:t2:
 
I would say for you to get hold of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) if you have not already. Then soak yourself in it, which is quite a lot, a thick book. You will not go wrong there and you would be sure to get the right information in the right perspective.

God bless.
 
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The Four Witnesses by Rod Bennet is also excellent. He has an engaging, storyteller writing style that make the Fathers come alive. I also have his The Apostasy That Wasn’t. I also have When the Church Was Young by Marcellino D’Ambrosio on my shelf.

I’m not sure what type of books you’re looking for. What about Why Be Catholic? by Patrick Madrid. And I’d HIGHLY recommend his Surprised By Truth Trilogy since you’re debating between Protestantism and Catholicism. Trent Horn has his new one, very similar, Why We’re Catholic. I’d recommend anything by Scott Hahn, Thomas Howard, Tim Staples, or Stephen K. Ray. I’m still churning through all these books on my shelf. Devin Rose had an interesting one: The Protestant’s Dilemma. Browse those titles on Amazon and have fun shopping. I hope you can realize the truth of the Church, but it really takes accepting Her authority, and by faith everything starts to fall into place. God bless! 😀
 
My advice, first define the problem(s) with the Catholic faith. You were baptized into it and you seem to indicate you have some familiarity with it. Ask yourself, what is it that pushes me away from Rome, what do I have trouble with, and where do I find myself comfortable. Then go and find the answers to your questions.
You are vague in your post as to what you have trouble with so none of us can really address it. And to be honest, at the stage you are in, anonymous posters of this website are probably not as good as a conversation with a solid, faithful Catholic priest.
Wishing you success in your search. Prayers and
Peace
 
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