What's a Godparent to do?

[kristie_m]

Here’s a dilema…

I was asked to be Godmother to a child who’s parents had been raised in the Catholic church, they left the church for a time, but returned prior to their daughter’s birth. A few years after the baptism, they moved out of state, and opted to join a different Christian church.

At her baptism, I agreed to help raise her in the faith…but her parent’s circumstances make that awkward at best. They have chosen, now, to raise her in a different faith. I want to follow through with the commitment I made at her baptism, but realistically, is there anything more I can do besides pray?

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Here’s a dilema…

I was asked to be Godmother to a child who’s parents had been raised in the Catholic church, they left the church for a time, but returned prior to their daughter’s birth. A few years after the baptism, they moved out of state, and opted to join a different Christian church.

At her baptism, I agreed to help raise her in the faith…but her parent’s circumstances make that awkward at best. They have chosen, now, to raise her in a different faith. I want to follow through with the commitment I made at her baptism, but realistically, is there anything more I can do besides pray?

Well of course pray, you can also send her a card or (small Catholic gift) reminding her (and them) of her Baptism on it’s aniversery date. Ask them when you speak with them (if you do) about their plans for First Communion.

 

[JimR-OCDS]

Here’s a dilema…
At her baptism, I agreed to help raise her in the faith

I think you might be over stating your role as a God parent.

Here’s what the Catechism says;

1255 For the grace of Baptism to unfold, the parents’ help is important. So too is the role of the godfather and godmother, who must be firm believers, able and ready to help the newly baptized - child or adult on the road of Christian life

In other words, you’re help is important, but in no way trumps the will and responsibility of the parents. If they chose not to raise the child in the Catholic faith, you really can’t do much about it, but neither are you responsible.

As others have mentioned, you can send cards and holy pictures to the child, which give some lesson in faith.

Jim

 

[kristie_m]

I think you might be over stating your role as a God parent.

Jim

Perhaps my wording is different, but the sentiment is the same. I’m not saying I’m totally responsible for her faith formation, but I DO take my role seriously. I’ve seen far too many “Godparents” that are nothing more than an honorary title. I see it as both privilage and responsibility.

 

[Andreas_Hofer]

This is also relevant:
CIC 872 Insofar as possible, a person to be baptized is to be given a sponsor who assists an adult in Christian initiation or together with the parents presents an infant for baptism. A sponsor also helps the baptized person to lead a Christian life in keeping with baptism and to fulfill faithfully the obligations inherent in it.

Once again, the focus is not on helping the parents, as it comes across in the baptismal rite itself, but on helping the baptized. That doesn’t solve the problem, but it gives it a good perspective different perspective. The real mess here is not a godparent trying to figure out her role but parents who have defaulted on a grave obligation they have undertaken. We are just trying to give advice on how to respond to that situation. While the parents have made it virtually impossible for the godmother to fulfill her role as it ought to be done, I would argue that her role is all the more important now that they are not helping the child as they agreed to do. I wouldn’t limit myself to just cards (although those are the safest start) but would also try to test the waters to see how much I could get away with without alienating the parents. Send books as presents. See how much I can expose the child to “what Catholics believe” (when presented that way it can be defended as sharing one’s own beliefs, not seeking to “impose” them on the poor Catholic child of lapsed parents). Get creative, and do your best, but you’re not obligated to burn bridges in doing so (and that wouldn’t help your godchild anyway).

 

[aimee]

Perhaps my wording is different, but the sentiment is the same. I’m not saying I’m totally responsible for her faith formation, but I DO take my role seriously. I’ve seen far too many “Godparents” that are nothing more than an honorary title. I see it as both privilage and responsibility.

Thank you so much for taking your roll as Godparent seriously…I wish more people did the same…
I don’t know when my children have even received a card