When someone won't forgive you

[Anglewannabe]

I am terribly sorry you are going through this. I have no idea what happened so I can only give feebback on what you posted. Also, don’t judge his heart. He may have forgiven you but does not feel it is safe to be around you again. So please see the following as charitable advice on a life’s lesson

I’ve accidentally hurt someone I love. I acted with the best intentions and with this person’s best interest in mind, and in my honest heart of hearts I did NOT mean to hurt this person.

This sounds to me like YOU somehow got the idea to help this person without first asking if he wanted your help. If there is one thing I can not stand is someone else not only deciding when I need help but the exact thing I need to help me. Perhaps in the future, offer to help, ask what would be required and follow the other person’s wishes

However, my actions did cause hurt feelings and embarrassment.

Sounds like this guy was publicly humiliated. Please be more discrete so as to not expose other people’s soft spots

I have acknowledged the pain I caused, apologized, offered explanations of my actions, assured person I meant NO harm. Still nothing. It is so painful to be sorry and to feel no resolution or forgiveness. The silent treatment is killing my heart! </3

As well intentioned as that is, it could actually be adding insult to injury. Offering an explanation as to why you did it can easily be seen as ‘I though I knew better than you (condescending) and I decided what would be good for you (boundary violation)’. If this was a girl, I would have suggested you hear her out as to why she is hurt, agree she has a good point and again repeat you were thoughless. However, since it is a guy, not sure that is such a good idea

 

[Rosebud77]

Wait and watch and pray. But if he is going to continue to sulk, then HIS loss frankly.

 

[Monica4316]

I’ve accidentally hurt someone I love. I acted with the best intentions and with this person’s best interest in mind, and in my honest heart of hearts I did NOT mean to hurt this person. However, my actions did cause hurt feelings and embarrassment. Have been receiving the silent treatment for five days now with no end in sight. I have acknowledged the pain I caused, apologized, offered explanations of my actions, assured person I meant NO harm. Still nothing. It is so painful to be sorry and to feel no resolution or forgiveness. The silent treatment is killing my heart! </3

I know that’s really hard a good friend told me, we can only clean our end of the street. Pray for the other person, and turn to God for healing.