Where are they?

  • Thread starter Thread starter azgirl
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Come to houston and i will set you up with some nice older men. I seem to have a good group of 35+ never married devot catholic men. I would date them myelf but i am in that “friend but not the girl-friend” category. Sigh whats a single girl to do??🤷
Aren’t you under 30?
 
Well remember you’re still young and things could change. I think it’s very difficult to be in your twenties these days. I am going to say I think it’s even harder than being a teenager.
It’s difficult no matter what age you are.
 
Aren’t you under 30?
Yep i am in my late twenties (28) but for some reason i tend to collect the 35+ bachelors. My friends call me the “old soul”. I may be younger but i tend to feel like i am in my mid 30’s instead of 20’s. Hence why i get along better with older men and know quite a few who are single and never married.

Sometimes i wish i could beat them over the heads when they make comments like when their discribing their future wives and makes comments “well kind of like you beckers” and I am like “Hello I am a women too. What am I some form of pond scum and am not dateable to you?” Sigh 🤷
 
Yeah, I used to get the “I wish I could find a nice guy like you” line a lot. Now I’d be lucky to get even that.
 
Where oh where are all the good single Catholic men (older than 30)?
If they were like-able enough to be married, wouldn’t they already be?

If not, then they might be good, single, and Catholic, but I’m guessing, not ‘marriage material’ (for whatever reason).

You know, the single life is just as holy a vocation as marriage.

But, if you are really sure you are called to marriage, wasn’t there a recent thread entitled “where did you meet your spouse?” or something? I think that might help to shed some light on where the good Catholic single men are all ‘hiding’ :D.

In Jesus Christ,

p.s I often hide out at my local Church for daily Mass, and I’ve noticed a few young single women hide out there too (alright, alright, some of them are over 80, but not all!!!) Maybe something to try?
 
If you find them let me know where they are. I know a few but they aren’t interested in me…they’ve made that clear…:rolleyes: I’m only attractive to players, non commitment types and jerks therefore since I’m well over 35 but not quite 40 I’ve decided to call it a day and give in. If some guy wants me he’s going to have to be pretty proactive or put in some work I’m just sick of the whole dating thing. I can take myself out on dates …without having to deal with the attitude, drama and emotional junk. As much as I would like a family and all that I want to keep my sanity too. The guys I constantly run into drive me up the wall with their selfish behavior. What ever happened to a guy chasing a gal or at least putting in some effort. I guess I’m just 40 years behind the times in my thinking. :mad:
They are out there Sierrah…Chivalry is not dead. 😃 what, may I ask, are the reasons that the Catholic guys told you they are not interested?
 
Yep i am in my late twenties (28) but for some reason i tend to collect the 35+ bachelors. My friends call me the “old soul”. I may be younger but i tend to feel like i am in my mid 30’s instead of 20’s. Hence why i get along better with older men and know quite a few who are single and never married.

Sometimes i wish i could beat them over the heads when they make comments like when their discribing their future wives and makes comments “well kind of like you beckers” and I am like “Hello I am a women too. What am I some form of pond scum and am not dateable to you?” Sigh 🤷
Older men make great husbands, too, beckers! I was 22 when I married my 32 year old husband…and we are still going strong. Well, there were bumps along the way, but we emerged stronger…and I think the nice thing about dating a man older…(not more than 15 years) is they are more mature…well, hopefully. lol:D
 
Older men make great husbands, too, beckers! I was 22 when I married my 32 year old husband…and we are still going strong. Well, there were bumps along the way, but we emerged stronger…and I think the nice thing about dating a man older…(not more than 15 years) is they are more mature…well, hopefully. lol:D
note If my father is reading this thread. Stop and click back to another page----😃

I totally agree. I actual would prefer to date an older guy. I will totally admit that i love grey hair and think it is becoming on an man. I was at the gym the other day and i kept thinking. “I am being distracted by all these older men hair!”. My age limit is they have to be closer to my age then my parents so that gives me about a 14 year age range. 40ish… MY mother did warn me that there are some issues with dating older men such as they will retire before you and you need to be prepared for some of the health issues as they age.

As for the other poster asking why these men aren’t taken. Well at lot of them have been scorned by women in their past and some have been focused on their careers and being established. I live in Houston so a lot of them are in oil industry and engineers or doctors and that takes awhile to established yourself. Alot of them didn’t feel comfortable dating while in that craziness.
 
There’s the issue of the ({Elder’sAge})/2+7 rule. Of course, you could get your age ceiling by doubling your age and subtracting seven.

Using myself for an example:

23 / 2 = 11.5 + 7 = 18.5
23 * 2 = 46 - 7 = 39

So my range would be 18-39. I don’t remember where I first heard this, but some people swear by it.
 
Just from looking at my life I don’t think marriage is what I’m headed for. I’m hardly even looking any more. Partly because I don’t feel ‘good enough’ for another person to enter into a relationship with me. Got some issues like severe lack of motivation in work/study/etc so I got no idea what my future is gonna be like from here, don’t want to drag someone else into the unknown darkness along with me. I don’t have the temperament for a relationship either, I’m anti social to the point of not having anything to say even when hanging out with my closest mates, and half the time I’m happier to be alone anyway. I think it is for the best that I stay single.
So, why not fix some of these issues?
 
If they were like-able enough to be married, wouldn’t they already be?

If not, then they might be good, single, and Catholic, but I’m guessing, not ‘marriage material’ (for whatever reason).
That is not necessarily the case. If you are a practicing Catholic and want a compatible practicing Catholic spouse, it is not as easy as it used to be; one is between a rock and a hard place, between the moral state of society today and that stupid “single vocation” nonsense being shoved down people’s throats and taking many prospective spouses “out of the market”.
 
It’s difficult no matter what age you are.
Do you mean it’s difficult dating no matter what age you are? I agree with that. I was talking about just existing in your twenties. I think it’s difficult to find others living a chaste and moral life in their twenties, moreso than in your thirties and forties. I have a lot of my relatives kids really not doing well in their twenties - the temptation to live the crazy lifestyle mixed with the newness of a first job and apartment, mixed with peer pressure, mixed with still trying to figure out where you’re going and who you’re becoming… I wouldn’t want to be doing that now.
 
That is not necessarily the case. If you are a practicing Catholic and want a compatible practicing Catholic spouse, it is not as easy as it used to be; one is between a rock and a hard place, between the moral state of society today and that stupid “single vocation” nonsense being shoved down people’s throats and taking many prospective spouses “out of the market”.
I agree. Not everyone who is single is necessarily called to the single vocation or to celibacy. Some are single, and don’t necessarily want to be simply because they feel it in their hearts that they were meant for the sacrament of marriage, whether prospects are in sight or not. People should not shove the “single vocation” down someone’s throat who does not feel like they are called to be single even though they are circumstantially so. It begins to painfully resemble this new idea among some evangelicals of our day that if you desire marriage but are single and don’t wish to be single, you must embrace your singleness as a gift because desiring marriage is supposedly “wrong.”

I can’t help but refuse to associate myself with people who think this way. They are among the worst kinds of people to confess your desires of marriage to. And that is a shame - because Christians of all people are taught in some way or another to bear one another’s burdens - and if we can’t get compassion from Christians, we are at a loss as to where to go next.
 
They are probably there but are not ready yet.

I find myself in the same situation (except that I’m a guy, where are the girls under 29?). Not too long ago I discovered my calling to be married and ever since then I’ve been looking. Just no one else around me seems to be looking (I have not gone to the internet yet because I rather marry someone from my community, for community strength).

I have found in most cases is that they have not discovered there calling just yet and rather be just friends until they find themselves or the world disciplines them to reality.

I think we as good Catholics (know our voactions and practice catholism) have to invite those are in the fringes closer to God via ministry and community. If one man or woman catches your eye then, then let them know, gently (pay a little more attention to them). They will respond in time. Not only do you help them discover themselves, you might get a mate out of it. It is loving and good for the community for it opens there eyes to the communtiy.

Happy searching,

God’s humble servant,
John A. H.
 
I agree. Not everyone who is single is necessarily called to the single vocation or to celibacy. Some are single, and don’t necessarily want to be simply because they feel it in their hearts that they were meant for the sacrament of marriage, whether prospects are in sight or not. People should not shove the “single vocation” down someone’s throat who does not feel like they are called to be single even though they are circumstantially so. It begins to painfully resemble this new idea among some evangelicals of our day that if you desire marriage but are single and don’t wish to be single, you must embrace your singleness as a gift because desiring marriage is supposedly “wrong.”

I can’t help but refuse to associate myself with people who think this way. They are among the worst kinds of people to confess your desires of marriage to. And that is a shame - because Christians of all people are taught in some way or another to bear one another’s burdens - and if we can’t get compassion from Christians, we are at a loss as to where to go next.
THANK YOU… Thank You so much for bring this up. I am one of those people who believes after discernment that i am not called to the reglious life and instead am called to marriage.I think there is a difference between being a okay with being single and feeling that is your calling. See i am happy and okay with being single but it is not the stage i want to be in forever.I can keep myself busy and involved and be self-sufficent but its not the life i feel called too.

Its so hard to trust in God because those feelings of loneliness set in. You start to look around and see all your friends moving on in their lives, in their vocations and your still stuck in the same place. Its gets lonely and sometimes you feel as if God has forgetten you. Its in those moments that we have to turn to God the most. Its hard but we have to do it.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top