Which third order for me?

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EasternCelt

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I am discerning joining a third order of a religious order. I have considered the Dominicans, Franciscans, and the Carmelites, but I’m not sure which would be right for me. I have a formal education in theology (church of Christ) and have a daily devotion to the Rosary, so my initial push is toward the Dominicans, but, at the same time, I have always identified with Scotism over against Thomism, so I think the Franciscans may be a better fit (it seems Dominicans must be Thomists). Finally, I love many Carmelite saints and love liturgical prayer, so there is some attraction there. Given my small anecdote here, which do you think I would fit in with best? Any advice would be welcomed.
 
EasternCelt said:
it seems Dominicans must be Thomists
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Lay Dominican in formation here with my two cents. I wouldn’t agree with this. Thomism is inescapable in the Dominicans, sure. I think you understand why. But to say to be a Dominican one must be a Thomist and like it would be erroneous. Dominicans do not follow St. Thomas Aquinas; we, St. Thomas Aquinas included, follow after the example out our Holy Father, St. Dominic.
 
Is Lay Cistercians an option? I would think that would be similar to Carmelites, though not sure what would draw one strongly one way or the other.
 
Brian_K said:
Is Lay Cistercians an option? I would think that would be similar to Carmelites, though not sure what would draw one strongly one way or the other.
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Or lay Benedictines, for that matter? The Cistercians were originally a reform of the Benedictines. So the Cistercians probably have more in common with Benedictines than Carmelites.
 
EasternCelt said:
So, I may be able to fit in with the Dominicans after all?
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I would say so. Dominicans are called to contemplate and to share the fruits of our contemplation. That is what is important. Why should we, whose motto is “Veritas”, not study what Scotus and Bonaventure had to say? Dominicans disagree with each other. I’ve been to lay meetings where we can’t go past one paragraph because we took the entire allotted 30 minutes of study debating over it. We chew on things. We debate their merits. The same will go for Scotus’ and Bonaventure’s thoughts.
 
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My advice would be take plenty of time to visit some of these houses as you’re able - either on retreat or just visiting the friaries to get to know more about their spirituality first-hand, and see what speaks to you. I was torn between Dominicans, Benedictines, Cistercians, and Carmelites. In the end, I chose one I didn’t even know about until my visits took me there because it seemed like the best “middle ground” of all of them.
 
If you like to live simply and in humility then (OFS) Franciscans is right for you!
 
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You need to actually spend time with the groups of people you’re thinking about joining.
Sitting around trying to figure it out on paper is like trying to choose a college from reading the brochure - you’re better off visiting the place.
 
EasternCelt said:
I am discerning joining a third order of a religious order. I have considered the Dominicans, Franciscans, and the Carmelites, but I’m not sure which would be right for me. I have a formal education in theology (church of Christ) and have a daily devotion to the Rosary, so my initial push is toward the Dominicans, but, at the same time, I have always identified with Scotism over against Thomism, so I think the Franciscans may be a better fit (it seems Dominicans must be Thomists). Finally, I love many Carmelite saints and love liturgical prayer, so there is some attraction there. Given my small anecdote here, which do you think I would fit in with best? Any advice would be welcomed.
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Exactly. Attend a meeting or two, at.least, of each of the third orders you are thinking of.

Besides which, most third orders also have a period of discernment and formation prior to making a final commitment .The candidate.and the community both need the opportunity to see how well they fit together.

It is during this time that such questions can.be answered.
 
Yes, I understand. I’m too far away to visit them all hence the question. I did not specify that, so I apologize. I live in rural KY with very few options.
 
When you say “third order,” do you mean to be a person living in the world (married or single), not professing vows but belonging to what is sometimes called the “lay” group, or do you mean a professed religious brother/sister living in community, part of a third order?
(e.g., I am a third order religious sister.
As far as which branch to join, the answer may lie largely in how the spirituality, community life, apostolate, etc. resonates with you rather than purely in theological backgrounds…just a thought.
 
EasternCelt said:
Yes, I understand. I’m too far away to visit them all hence the question. I did not specify that, so I apologize. I live in rural KY with very few options.
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You’re too far away to visit them, but propose to become a member for the rest of your life? While technically isolated members are a thing, indeed I am one at present, t is far from an ideal way to start off.

And formation, even at a distance, usually still requires a great deal of one-on-one communication with your formator. Which is your opportunity to find out if the order is a fit for you
 
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If they’re too far away for you to visit them, then how are you going to attend the regular meetings that you would need for your formation as a member?
As Lily said, it seems difficult to start off as an isolated member.
 
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You live in rural KY? You’re not as far away as you may think… feel free to PM me; I can send you the names of some communities I’m aware of near you.
 
I sometimes kind of chuckle inside because my daughter’s name in religious is taken from two Dominican saints whom she has had a devotion to for many years, but she’s a very Carmelite girl. I’d say the Dominicans are a very real possibility for you.
 
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