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naknek
Guest
I vote for the lukewarm Catholic, because then at least you can raise your kids Catholic without any resistance.
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Bruised_Reed
Guest
Any resistance? My dad gave my Mom a lot of grief for different “Catholic” things she did. It’s possible for a person who is Catholic to have some hostility towards the church. But I agree with your point of view. I think someone who is Catholic would be less likely to freak than a non-Catholic (esp. one that is Christian) when the rosary beads come out.
Hrm. Let me add a pagan to the list. One that is totally okay with raising the children Catholic, thinks Catholic customs and rituals are “interesting.” And the lukewarm Catholic is disinterested :ehh:
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naknek
Guest
Blood Rain:
Well, if I were forced to choose one or the other, and remaining single were not an option, I might lean toward a pagan with Catholic sympathies over a disinterested Catholic. But it really would depend on how much they would aid or harm my efforts to raise my children Catholic.
For example, how would they respond to the kids’ questions about God? If the pagan said, “well, I think God is (insert pagan deities here), but your dad disagrees,” I would have to choose even a disinterested Catholic over that. The worst a disinterested Catholic might do is say “I think some of those Catholic rules are hogwash, but at least they’ve got the basics down.”
But if the pagan truly were open to raising the kids Catholic, even to the point of joining me in unity of teaching on faith and morals to a greater degree than the “Catholic” would, I would say the pagan would sound like the more appealing option. That sort of person could be a prime candidate for conversion over time.
Do I sense a slippery slope here?
Well, if I were forced to choose one or the other, and remaining single were not an option, I might lean toward a pagan with Catholic sympathies over a disinterested Catholic. But it really would depend on how much they would aid or harm my efforts to raise my children Catholic.For example, how would they respond to the kids’ questions about God? If the pagan said, “well, I think God is (insert pagan deities here), but your dad disagrees,” I would have to choose even a disinterested Catholic over that. The worst a disinterested Catholic might do is say “I think some of those Catholic rules are hogwash, but at least they’ve got the basics down.”
But if the pagan truly were open to raising the kids Catholic, even to the point of joining me in unity of teaching on faith and morals to a greater degree than the “Catholic” would, I would say the pagan would sound like the more appealing option. That sort of person could be a prime candidate for conversion over time.
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timbo1980
Guest
What about being able to share your faith and spiritual walk with your partner. The family that prays together stays together, remember? It would be a lot harder to raise your children in a divorced home than with some resistance from your partner.
I think we over empasize our differences with Protestants. While not ideal, I would rather be married to someone who is a strong Christian than someone who is a crappy Catholic.
I think we over empasize our differences with Protestants. While not ideal, I would rather be married to someone who is a strong Christian than someone who is a crappy Catholic.
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OhioBob
Guest
I tend to agree, however, I think it depends upon just what kind of protestant Christian you are talking about. Some would be far more opposed to certain Catholic teachings and practices and that could cause quite a bit of conflict in the family.
If I had to choose from only the two options proposed, I would probably vote for the luke warm Catholic. Luke warm at least suggests some basic grounding in the faith that can always grow with time. I didn’t read it to be someone who would be opposed to Catholic teachings.
It is a sort of catch-22 though.
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CathyD
Guest
Don’t be so sure about the lukewarm Catholic. A very good friend of mine married a lukewarm Catholic…who became an anti-Catholic Protestant. He almost didn’t allow the oldest to make her First Holy Communion. We’ll see if he allows the next to do so…
Cathy
Cathy
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EsclavoDeCristo
Guest
Blood Rain said:
Are those the only choices? I choose a “Godly” Catholic. That’s one thing that I don’t think I could ever compromise on…
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pittsburghjeff
Guest
I didnt compromise either…I mean marriage is a lifetime…
But…if i had to choose…I would choose the Godly non-Catholic
Why? Because truth be told sometimes non-Catholics have more in common with our belief system than the people sitting next to us in the pews.
For example, Jerry Falwell clearly has more in common with the Pope than Ted Kennedy
I’d take a prolife bible-believing protestant any day over a John Kerry Catholic…
But…if i had to choose…I would choose the Godly non-Catholic
Why? Because truth be told sometimes non-Catholics have more in common with our belief system than the people sitting next to us in the pews.
For example, Jerry Falwell clearly has more in common with the Pope than Ted Kennedy
I’d take a prolife bible-believing protestant any day over a John Kerry Catholic…
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nfpworks
Guest
I didn’t compromise either! In today’s world, we really have to be together! There is so much out there that can harm our families and values, etc. We try to really give our kids a solid foundation.
Although I totally agree–A “Godly” non catholic (Dr. James Dobson - another example) would be so-o-o-o-o much better than a Kennedy or John Kerry.
Although I totally agree–A “Godly” non catholic (Dr. James Dobson - another example) would be so-o-o-o-o much better than a Kennedy or John Kerry.
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1ke
Guest
Blood Rain said:
They are both equally dangerous to your soul and that of future children… accept no substitute and no compromise… the narrow path is the only path: 100% committed Catholic or Bust.
Seriously, remember, the vocation of marriage is one of service to family-- with the primary end to assist your spouse and children in attaining heaven-- why would you want a spouse as a steward of your soul and those of your children who is less than 100% Catholic?
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montanaman
Guest
I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’d take a devout Protestant over a mushy Catholic any day, hands down. At least with the Protestant you’ve got the common ground of Christ. A mushy Catholic is still too much in the world.
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Jay74
Guest
I’m a Godly non-Catholic that is marrying a devout Catholic. Since I don’t claim a denomination, and she does, and I know this going in, we attend a Catholic Church and follow church teachings.
Her ex-husband was a lukewarm Catholic. So is the mother of his illegimate child conceived during the marriage (and coincidentally, that affair is reason for the divorce).
I try to judge Christians (Catholic and Protestant) by their behavior as much as their theology (unless that theology is unacceptable). As for devout Catholics, and devout Protestants, I find their behvior often exemplary. With the rapid moral decline of our nation, I sincerely regard both (and their strong faith in Jesus Christ) as the nation’s best hope to bring morality to society. They disagree on some things, and some of them very important, but I believe both sides have more important battles to fight for Christ rather than over Him.
Blessings to all.
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Annunciata
Guest
Blood Rain:
p.s. I married 2 "Godly Catholic men.
My father was a nominal Catholic who left the Church for his first wife, an Anglican. She died and he married my mother, a “Godly” Baptist woman. When I converted, my mother was far more understanding about my decision than my father. She eventually became a “Godly” Catholic woman… So I think “Godly” is the key word here. (BTW, Daddy did return to the Faith before he died).
p.s. I married 2 "Godly Catholic men.
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Baby_Sister
Guest
I’m married to a Baptist who attended Mass with me every Sunday of our marriage (15 years), I have friends with Catholic husbands who go to Mass maybe two or three times a year. Which do you think is better?
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Catholic_Cadet
Guest
I’d take Godly protestant, but I’m a bit biased having had a crush on a godly Baptist girl for a long time.
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EsclavoDeCristo
Guest
Great point. I have to agree with you 110%!
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Bruised_Reed
Guest
To the Forum Member to gave me negative rep points (big ol’ red square) I don’t understand your comment:
The rep points should require ID. Then see how many have the balls to use them.
And you gave me neg rep points for asking a question? I hope you don’t have children. Loser.
The rep points should require ID. Then see how many have the balls to use them.
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Faithful_2_Rome
Guest
Neither
If in the course of our dating…presupposing, months or a few years of courtship…I couldnt get my Lukewarm Catholic girlfriend to become “hot”… and if I was dating a Godly non Catholic and couldnt get them to convert…I’d end BOTH relationships…the entire dating process should include FAITH as much as it does sexual attraction, compatibility, and if she can live with xtra cheese and pepperoni on the ENTIRE pizza when I order one.
If in the course of our dating…presupposing, months or a few years of courtship…I couldnt get my Lukewarm Catholic girlfriend to become “hot”… and if I was dating a Godly non Catholic and couldnt get them to convert…I’d end BOTH relationships…the entire dating process should include FAITH as much as it does sexual attraction, compatibility, and if she can live with xtra cheese and pepperoni on the ENTIRE pizza when I order one.
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Bruised_Reed
Guest
Let’s say I have 3 possible suitors, a Catholic, a non-Catholic Christian and a Pagan. All are Catholic-friendly. My first choice is going to be Catholic for the reasons 1ke explained. But after that I’m not real sure. Probably Christian then Pagan.
I personally would want to have this most important part of my life (my faith) something I shared with the one I am going to spend the rest of my life and have children with.
I once heard that people fall in love with those they spend time with. Since so many spend time with people outside of church (school, work, activities, friends (you do have non-catholic friends, don’t you?) that is likely to happen. A lot. And so my question.
Very interesting responses. Marriage has so many challanges already that it’s seems wise not to contribute to the challanges by marrying outside of one’s religion. Then again, I’ve heard of many couples who started out as interfaith and one converts to the other’s religion. It’s just not something one can bank on.
This is a question that all unmarried people should consider before even going on a date. I know I’ve not been able to control whom I’ve “fallen in love with.” But I can control who I allow to get that close to some extent. I think. :whacky:
I personally would want to have this most important part of my life (my faith) something I shared with the one I am going to spend the rest of my life and have children with.
I once heard that people fall in love with those they spend time with. Since so many spend time with people outside of church (school, work, activities, friends (you do have non-catholic friends, don’t you?) that is likely to happen. A lot. And so my question.
Very interesting responses. Marriage has so many challanges already that it’s seems wise not to contribute to the challanges by marrying outside of one’s religion. Then again, I’ve heard of many couples who started out as interfaith and one converts to the other’s religion. It’s just not something one can bank on.
This is a question that all unmarried people should consider before even going on a date. I know I’ve not been able to control whom I’ve “fallen in love with.” But I can control who I allow to get that close to some extent. I think. :whacky:
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