Who else here struggle with family reunion over Christmas

[Azaryahtt]

Hi all, and before anything I wish you the peace and love of God this Holiday.
As the Christmas season approaches, I do have something to share and I was wondering if someone else struggles over the same things it’s kind of a long story but I kind of think that some members of my family is still hold some things of the past against me, that is from my past life so it’s a very unsettling thought and it causes me conflict of mind goes in one hand I loved them obviously but on the other hand I believe I’ve been forgiven or at least I want to believe I have .
Also as a result of having been in what is commonly known as a cult for many years I I stayed away for a long time almost 10 years without seeing them and I think they hold things against me also as I got out I was a psychologically still suffering from that experience and even though they came to see me , circumstances has made imposible for me to stay close, (in fact I have had to leave again), so I do have bad conscience about that also even struggling to the point of thinking that I didn’t do God’s will.
I could go into more detail but it would take me too long I was wondering if anybody here has struggled in the recent or not so recent past with similar situation thank you very much and God bless

 

[Azaryahtt]

Thanks , you know , I feel it’s almost a moral duty , specially to my parents (whom I love to pieces, and they love me to) since I was away for so long, there has been not so much understanding with some other members though, they still look at me as if I was some kind of alien or something, they just don’t get what got me to join this group (cult) , and obviously , not a clue about the suffering it takes to start all over again,

 

[Kei]

Perhaps talk it over with some of them, about it. And how you want to start a new relationship with them.

 

[Azaryahtt]

Perhaps, time have caused some damage obviously, I wasn’t there to change it , so that adds to the feeling of culpability

 

[Tulitas]

I would give anything to have Christmas with my family.
I hope your time together is blessed with healing.

 

[Kei]

Well, if you did anything wrong to them, apologize and make amends.

 

[Crocus]

Love you to pieces @Azaryahtt.
Encourage and support you in your struggle.

Remember you are a child of God, beloved and precious. Have courage.

 

[Azaryahtt]

I hope you can see them too, I won’t be there for Christmas day though, it’s too expensive to travel for me , plus I work that day I will be spending new year’s eve and epiphany