Why am I always thinking about being a nun?

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Every relationship didn’t feel right, and something would happen and I’d break it off. When Im with a guy I envision Jesus in front of me. Nothing in life brings me happiness or fulfillment. I don’t like money, and everything MATERIAL in this world.
What should I do?

Iv tried many career paths and nothing excites me. I feel like theres something lacking and we live in a very corrupt fallen world. A lot of people have hurt and abandoned me except our LORD. He’s been my friend since childhood

I have discerned with several communities, and was a live in, but then I don’t know why I feel like I wouldn’t be happy in a convent and pursue other worldly pleasures. Im not sure if its Satan?
Major reason why I haven’t joined is because I want to take care of my soon to be elderly mother. She suffers from a lot of health issues.
Please give me advice
 
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It may well be the Holy Spirit prompting you to investigate Consecrated Life.

Find a spiritual director (if you don’t have one already), and start researching various religious orders to see if any pique your interest.
Most of the time God comes to us disguised as our own life.
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I will be praying for you,
Deacon Christopher
 
Happy to - it means that most of the time God does not speak to us through a burning bush or a knock-Saul-to-the-ground manner.

Most of the time God comes to you through regular people and interactions in your life.

So, this series of men you have dated that always bring you to see [seek?] Jesus is probably God prompting you to consider a religious vocation.

When I entered the seminary to study for the priesthood there wasn’t a voice from the sky; rather, just a steady stream of people I knew casually asking me if I had ever considered becoming a priest.

A spiritual director can help you listen to the voice of God in our noisy lives.

God bless,
Deacon Christopher

PS: You can message me privately if you need some help finding a director, etc.
 
Welcome to CAF, np92.

Sounds like you’ve been doing the correct work on your end. The concern about your elderly mother is indeed legitimate, and will be an impediment to entering consecrated life.

As St. Therese said, she was going to start becoming a saint right then, not waiting for Carmel. Perhaps writing your own personal prayer rule, remembering flexibility for your mom’s care, would help you become a saint before any committed lifestyle. To St. Vincent de Paul, that was “leaving God for God.” A spiritual director would also be a huge plus. If unable to find one, the Liturgy of the Hours, and the spiritual classics can suffice for the same for the time being.

Blessings,
Mrs Cloisters
http://cloisters.tripod.com/charity/
http://cloisters.tripod.com/
 
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