Why are kids so picky?

[BayCityRickL]

I have no first hand experience with this, why a boy or girl would have so many food dislikes. I didn’t like eggs for a long time, into my adulthood. So, I can understand not liking one or two things, but I see a kid who has a limited range - fried chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, and french fries, for the most part – or perhaps very frequently.

When do they outgrow this pickiness?

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

I have no first hand experience with this, why a boy or girl would have so many food dislikes. I didn’t like eggs for a long time, into my adulthood. So, I can understand not liking one or two things, but I see a kid who has a limited range - fried chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, and french fries, for the most part – or perhaps very frequently.

When do they outgrow this pickiness?

It depends on many things.

Neurological disorders can cause food dislikes.

Outside of neurological disorders, there’s a lot of poor parenting going on. Many parents no longer try to parent. They practice “open kitchen” and are afraid of letting their kid experience any discomfort, nevermind pain.

My husband and I never wanted our children to go hungry. We quickly realized our 13 months old had figured out how to avoid new foods and manipulate us. So now she HAS to try new foods. IF she likes the food we give her more. If she clearly hates the food we will give her something she likes after the 2 or 3 mouthfuls are eaten.

She’s learned these rules. She has chosen to not eat on more than one occasion.

I think many parents today do not do this. They would rather their child not fuss.

 

[midori]

I took care of my SIL and her children when she was down with the flu. I hauled over several jars of homemade chicken stock and made her chicken soup, and served the kids some, too.

Her oldest was in fifth or sixth grade, and he was the whiniest little rude thing about the whole thing. “Just try it. Eat one bite, that’s all I’m asking.” But it didn’t matter-- he flat-out refused and whined and was such a pathetic baby. His younger sibling wasn’t any better, and the youngest sibling at least ate a few mouthfuls before he abandoned it.

Their pantry is full of processed food and junk. She doesn’t like making her kids do stuff they don’t want to do— and I’m not the only one who’s been offended when you try to do something nice and thoughtful, and they turn your hard work into trash.

–edit-- It just occurred to me, I know other people who have hosted my SIL have commented on her own poor grace at trying unfamiliar food. Not unfamiliar food like, say, balut or something else likely to make an appearance on “Bizarre Foods”, but ordinary food, like bouef bourguignon. So her own habits are definitely reflected/magnified in her kids.

I have a friend. He’s a grown man, ex-military, everything. He is a total baby if a vegetable even touches his plate. It was almost embarrassing to eat with him in a restaurant.

So— my guess is, people never learn, until they learn that eating x is preferable to the social stigma of being ungrateful about the food your’e served. And in the case of my adult friend, he’s got too much self-confidence to be susceptible to social stigma.

Me, I was raised that if I didn’t eat it for dinner, I’d be seeing it again at the next meal. And the next meal. And however long it took. But my husband doesn’t like the conflict at the table that goes along with making kids cooperate. So I’m not able to be as strict as I’d like with my kids. And they end up being rude and ungrateful periodically, and it embarrasses me— because whether I’m the one on the receiving end, or even worse, someone else is, that’s just not acceptable behavior. But the older one is gradually maturing a bit, and is getting better at eating what’s in front of him, but he still occasionally forgets that he likes x, y, and z and will kick up a fuss over things that he liked the last time they were served.

 

[BornInMarch]

There could be any number of reasons a child won’t like a food. It could be negative associations (i.e. a child’s parent grounded them for not eating broccoli so now they associate it with belittlement and powerlessness), fear about the food (i.e. a child got sick after eating carrots and thinks they made them sick), unease about the food’s origins (i.e. a child won’t eat eggs because they come out of an animal’s butt), or it could be that the food is an acquired taste (i.e. anchovies are great, but the first time you try it the taste is abnormally salty), or it could be some other reason.

Getting children to try new foods requires patience and a bit of guile. A health teacher I had said he has a few tricks to get his children to try new foods. These include letting his children have some choice over the matter (they can use familiar sauces to make vegitables more palatable, and they can choose which vegitables get prepared for them at meals) and making new foods fun so his children have positive associations with them (such as pretending broccoli is trees), among other things.

 

[Trishie]

In many cases it is possible that the old saying holds, ‘As the sapling is bent thus does the tree grow’
You begin early enough to introduce children to different tastes, and persevere.
Yes that can be a battle sometimes, but it’s best for the children.

My experience…We always had healthy well balanced meals, and when our children were too young for solid food, i’d process smoothly some of the same healthy vegetables and protein, later mashed, and later still, cut into small pieces. We didn’t buy pre-prepared food. I used to make even our own muesli.

When my grandson was rescued from his mother to be raised by my son, he would only request ‘dry noodles, Grandma’. You’d think he was being poisoned as we gradually introduced him to real food. It took time and patience but he now enjoys a wide range of foods.
It doesn’t do a child any favours to allow them to avoid a healthy diet, it will ultimately affect their adult health.

It’s okay to sometimes have treats that may be less healthy, but only if a healthy diet is routinely followed. And it’s acceptable to say, you can have dessert if you finish your veggies.

It is important to respect genuine food allergies of course.

 

[Allegra]

My 2yo son was recently diagnosed with a texture based food aversion. Essentially, certain food textures, or even foods that he perceives are likely to be of those texture, cause his gag reflex to overreact and the results can be vomiting, choking, actual throat pain, and just general discomfort from attempting to eat them. Based on my research, there are a few things that are common causes of a texture-based food aversion. Medical trauma involving the mouth or digestive tract. Severe reflux in infancy. A history of using a feeding tube. Allergies to food. Problems with the structure or function of the jaw. Sensory issues due to autism or other sensory processing issues. And child abuse involving food or feeding. And no one can explain why my kid has this because he has experienced none of these issues and he still gags when he tries to eat many things.

In addition, feeding problems can be a psychological issue or a control issue, but I think that’s more common in kids 3 and up.

 

[Allegra]

Also, the vast majority of young kids prefer “soft meats” like chicken nuggets and hamburger. They have a consistent texture and are easy to chew quickly.

 

[mickeyboggs]

If you are having a hard time getting your children to eat fruits and veggies, I suggest having them help out in the kitchen. But make it fun. You could have a night where you make homemade sweet potato fries or homemade chili. While they would be learning about using the kitchen, they also will be able to actively help by, for example, sprinkling salt or garlic powder on dishes or stirring the chili sauce. You could tell them, “You don’t have to eat it but I really need your help in the kitchen today.” Then after the product is done, you could taste it and tell them they did a really good job on it and it’s delicious. Then ask if they want to try what they made. I think it is important to be gentle with children even when they are difficult to handle.
I think that is the best way for a child to outgrow pickiness as they learn more about their food and build their self-esteem.

 

[ErraticFaith]

Because they are kids

Don’t sweat it too much. Teach discipline and love and the rest falls into place.

Taste buds shift as we age a great deal. That’s normal as flavours like alcohol mellow and become more palitable, whilst high sugar/saturated foods often diminish.

 

[brian_custer]

it’s interesting that starving children will eat grasshoppers

and children who are really “not that hungry” are “picky”

 

[Rosalie]

I think sometimes the issue is that parents start their kids off on very bland foods, like oatmeal, rice cereal, etc or just assume their children will not like vegetables. We fed our daughter a variety of foods from the beginning and avoided bland carbs. She doesn’t always finish her food, which is fine with us, but the only food I’d say she’s consistently not thrilled about about is potatoes.

 

[AlNg]

Children are picky because their parents baby them and give them too many choices.

 

[ConfusedLucy]

When I was a kid in the 90s there was kids food and adult food although kids food did include plain veg. I can remember being 10 and going on a residential where the food was adult and most of us wouldn’t eat it because it was too unfamiliar.

 

[Viki63]

I just provide a plate with several choices on it, and leave the child to eat or not what he chooses. Usually he will finish it. Cheese, orange slices, crackers, and so on. But that was for a child whose mother hovered over him & worried about his eating. As others have said, if you have healthy food in the house and not junk, they will eat what’s there.

 

[Greenfields]

Two of my children didn’t really like eggs,so as one preferred yolks and the other the whites they swapped.Later my daughter worked out she’s slightly sensitive to eggs.There were a few foods that wernt popular and I didn’t push the issue as there was the tendency for food sensetivity.
We were very adventurous with foods…there wasn’t much issue at all

 

[F_Marturana]

I think as long as the food is healthy, I don’t mind the pickiness.

My son has probably eaten a turkey sandwich on whole grain or wheat bread with an apple for maybe 75 percent of his lunches for his whole life.

He’s 16.

 

[BartholomewB]

Two of my children didn’t really like eggs,so as one preferred yolks and the other the whites they swapped.

I‘ve met people from time to time – people I’ve worked with, adult males, married men with families – who only eat the yolk and leave the white, or the other way around. That kind of pickiness has always struck me as very wasteful. How convenient to have a matching pair in your family!

 

[Greenfields]

My daughter can’t have anything coconut flavoured ,or scented as it makes her feel nauseated .She had recurring ear infection when she was little and the penicillin was sort of coconut flavoured.

 

[Clementine14]

My son has sensory issues and many feeding issues, which requires intensive therapy. We pay for this out of pocket. I assure you that we would prefer not to pay $300/month for this, and that he isn’t just “spoiled”. No, he will not eat if he gets hungry enough. He will starve himself. He gags and vomits when trying new foods. He has choked on small pieces of food. He also has food allergies.

Please don’t assume anything about a child or his or her parents regarding feeding. I have gotten many looks and even comments from other people when at a restaurant feeding him purees or even from checkout people at the grocery store. There are children who are simply picky, and there are children with real problems. If you don’t know which it is, it is kind to assume that parents are doing the best they can to make sure their child is healthy and growing.

It is also not poor manners to refuse to try a new food. Someone above mentioned poor grace and social stigma. Eating is a very personalized experience. If a parent wants to make their child try something, in the absence of any known food allergies or other feeding issues, that’s fine. But in the company of others- even family members- who may or may not know about any issues involved, it’s not nice to make people feel badly about their personal preferences or health issues. People should feel free to politely decline anything they don’t want to eat, without having it made into a topic of discussion. This goes for children too.

 

[starlady]

Because they are kids

Don’t sweat it too much. Teach discipline and love and the rest falls into place.

Taste buds shift as we age a great deal. That’s normal as flavours like alcohol mellow and become more palitable, whilst high sugar/saturated foods often diminish.

I think so. My dear, poor parents, I was a very picky eater. I didn’t like meat - very few types of meat I would readily and completely eat. I also didn’t like several veggies, such as mushrooms, onions or peppers. I have no medical condition or food allergy - I was just simply a picky eater.

My parents never forced us to completely finish everything on our plate, instead encouraging us only to take what we would eat, BUT we did have to take a little of everything. But as others have mentioned, even if we didn’t like something, my parents would make us sit at the table, even after dinner had finished and everyone had left, until we ate a few bites of whatever it was we didn’t want to eat. Dessert (if there was any) was a privilege only for those who at least ate a few bites of everything.

Taste buds do age. I now really love most meats. I like trying new cuisines. Still not a big fan of onions or peppers, although I’ll eat them. (Can’t do mushrooms though…don’t like the chewy texture) This new expansion of my taste buds started when I got to high school (what teenager wants to be left at the table because they haven’t eaten all their food? lol) and grew even more in college where I was exposed to new foods and new friends who liked different kinds of food. I found out I really like authentic Mexican and Indian food (although not too spicy, please), and if you would have told 10-year old me that, she would have said you were crazy.