I find it very strange that when the church talks about marriage, they use the analogy that the man is like Christ and the woman is “the church.” It seems to put men above women - men are God in the analogy, and women are merely human. Why doesn’t the church say that spouses should love each other like Christ loved the church? Anyone else have a problem with this?
St. Paul, inspired by the Holy Spirit and aware of the sacrificial life of Jesus (who gave up his LIFE for “His Bride” the Church in offering Himself on the Cross) spoke of these things - in an inverse way … as Jesus did.
Christianity is NOT ruling over the other. It is placing oneself “below” the other in service (as Jesus emptied Himself of His Divine Rights to become a baby, child, man living in primitive times in a conquered land).
You didn’t say which sex you are … but it doesn’t matter in considering this. A man must be ready to lay down his life for his bride … and for some reason St. Paul “merely” (by comparison if we are to be worldly and critical of his words) instructs the women to “honor their husbands”. To the men it’s " love your wives."
Men ARE not God of course, but members of the Church … and have to ponder over what it MEANS to be part of “The Bride” spiritually. So … the Blessed Mother becomes their role model too.
Women of course look to Jesus as Lord and follow Him clothed in the personality (and sexuality) they are given.
It’s perhaps the mystery of children that becomes most illustrative of what Christianity is.
Who “outranks” whom in the Parent/child relationship? On one hand … the old “rules over” the younger (though as the younger grows, less and less all the time) - on the other hand, it is the older who serves the younger (paying for meals, changing diapers, dressing them when they are helpless).
Just as “The Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve …” Men are to be loving, generous, caring and nurturing to their wives and children. These same men have of course been reared (“ruled over” if we must say it

) by their mothers - though a nicer way to put it is they have been instructed, cared for and launched into adulthood by their mothers.
There is also the value that in Christ “the two become one” and not forever two battling
people, keeping score rather than entrusting themselves to the worthy and deserving other as a cherished partner.
We live in a politicized time … and must be on guard that we have a very savvy spiritual enemy who’d like to lead us into unfruitful thinking … and worse.
The Bible begins and ends with a couple mystery. The intimacy of God’s creation of man, then woman, then child … and a journey toward an otherworldly union between the Lord and his beloved creatures in an intimacy so full of sublime happiness and harmony … it is expressed as a glorious wedding (at the end of Revelation).
The longing bridegroom has waited and suffered for his bride. His bride has made herself ready with an open heart and immaculate apparel.
“Male and female He made them …” is a mystery to us … but if we seek out God’s inspiration over man’s worldly cynicism and complaints regarding all things holy – we will more likely reap the joy of what Our Father has done for us.
This was written more as a self-exploration than any kind of power play lecture by the way.
I am richer for you having posed the question it seems. Thank you. :aok: