Why Celibacy if Marriage is So Glorious?

[zab]

This is why I think it bothers me so. I hear so much lately about how glorious marriage is and how pure and holy it should be, and yet (comparatively) I hear less about the theological depth inherent in celibacy.

When such an emphasis is placed on one and not the other by those around me I feel great ease in ascribing more emphasis on one than the other.

Several years ago I had such a longing to be closer to God and I felt somewhat saddened that it seemed impossible for me, a wife and mother of many children, to ever be as close to God as his priests and religious. I went on a silent retreat. The retreat itself was not all that great but God has a way of working through imperfect people. By the end of the retreat, my anxieties were gone and I was happy to return to the vocation that God has me to, wife and mother. Everyone is called to live a contemplative life, a close intimate life with God no matter what their vocation is. Are you thinking about being a priest because it is what you what to do or is it because you are feeling a calling from God to the priesthood? I would suggest that you go on a retreat with the intention of asking God what vocation He is calling you to.

 

[baltobetsy]

(I may be re-phrasing what I have already said) What I want to know is if man is designed for the nuptial mystery, made to be an icon of the Divine Life in the family, and capable of co-creating rational persons made in the image of God with God: why then is clerical celibacy “better.” (I use the word “better” in reference to how it has always been explained to me).

A priest is a co-creator in the spiritual realm, while the husband and father is one in the natural realm. A priest, through the sacraments of Baptism and Penance, brings dead souls to life! And not just two or three or even eight or ten, as a husband and father might bring forth children, but thousands in the course of a vocation. “A hundredfold in this life and life everlasting!”

I think you’ll be OK when your studies are more balanced.

Betsy

 

[Antonius_Lupus]

A priest is a co-creator in the spiritual realm, while the husband and father is one in the natural realm. A priest, through the sacraments of Baptism and Penance, brings dead souls to life! And not just two or three or even eight or ten, as a husband and father might bring forth children, but thousands in the course of a vocation. “A hundredfold in this life and life everlasting!”

I think you’ll be OK when your studies are more balanced.

Betsy

Thank you…I just wanted to get some thoughts.

Please keep me in your prayers.

 

[SMHW]

Antonius,

Are you more questioning why giving up marriage for the sake of the kingdom would be a good thing?

Or are you more concerned by the apparent disparity between the Eastern Church and the Western Church regarding celibacy of priests?

It seems to me that most people here have chosen to address the first possibility but not many have addressed the second.

 

[EasterJoy]

What is bothering me is really more of an intellectual issue…the desire for an explanation.

(I may be re-phrasing what I have already said) What I want to know is if man is designed for the nuptial mystery, made to be an icon of the Divine Life in the family, and capable of co-creating rational persons made in the image of God with God: why then is clerical celibacy “better.” (I use the word “better” in reference to how it has always been explained to me).

What is the theological reason why the Faith often allows for one or the other and not both, since both are such clearly good and edifying realities.

There is the escatological reason, for in the end there are four things: death, judgment, heaven, and hell. “I tell you, brothers, the time is running out. From now on, let those having wives act as not having them, those weeping as not weeping, those rejoicing as not rejoicing, those buying as not owning, those using the world as not using it fully. For the world in its present form is passing away.” 1 Cor. 7:29-31. Like the wearing of black, it is appropriate that a priest live not only celibately but also in simplicity, detached from material wealth as well, as a radical witness that this world is passing away. Celibacy can be understood as an integral part of that detachment. In wearing black, a priest witnesses that he belongs solely to the world beyond marriage, because his life points to the world beyond death.

Celibacy prefigures heaven not because marriage is not good, but because a life beyond marriage is the end to which we all hope to travel. As Our Lord said, “You are misled because you do not know the scriptures or the power of God. At the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage but are like the angels in heaven.” Matt. 22-29-30

As for the creative aspect, keep in mind that it is only the one who is born again through the waters of baptism that has life eternal. Therefore, the priest does share the paternal aspect of God; at least, in the way that St. Joseph did. This quote, taken from Theology of the Priesthood (Jean Galot, SJ) illustrates: “Those who proclaim and teach the Word of God must zealously renounce marriage in order to dedicate themselves to the performance of loftier deeds. They are fostering a divine and spiritual offspring. They do not rear just one or two children. Their concern extends to an endless multitude.” Eusebius, Bishop of Caesarea (c. 263–339), bishop and historian.

These are both reasons I have heard from priests: that is, by their celibacy, they live in the present time as a witness of the life of love intended for all us for eternity and that they give up the blessing of raising a relatively few biological children in order to be spiritual father of score upon score of others. It is not easy, but they would choose it, given the choice, knowing what their priesthood has taught them. If a priest were either married or wealthy–both blessings that Christians are allowed to have but that priests renounce–they would lose that witness.

 

[EasterJoy]

Antonius,

Are you more questioning why giving up marriage for the sake of the kingdom would be a good thing?

Or are you more concerned by the apparent disparity between the Eastern Church and the Western Church regarding celibacy of priests?

It seems to me that most people here have chosen to address the first possibility but not many have addressed the second.

I’ll quote Theology of the Priesthood again:
"…The East is not unacquainted with priestly celibacy. According to the Council in Trullo of the year 692, bishops must practice perfect continence. If married, they must separate from their wives. The East also accepts the rule that those who have received sacred orders may not marry, whereas ordained married men may continue to enjoy the use of marriage.
If the Eastern Church allowed clerics to marry, the reason was not that marriage was regarded as an ideal to be pursued, but that the realization of the evangelical ideal is controlled in any moment by concrete circumstances. In certain countries, the conditions that affect life in society and which forms the prevailing mentality are such as to take away from clerics the possibility of practicing voluntary celibacy “for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.” (p. 242)

 

[EasterJoy]

I think you would also find Presbyterorum Ordinis good reading on the subject.
vatican.va/archive/hist_councils/ii_vatican_council/documents/vat-ii_decree_19651207_presbyterorum-ordinis_en.html.

 

[Antonius_Lupus]

Antonius,

Are you more questioning why giving up marriage for the sake of the kingdom would be a good thing?

Or are you more concerned by the apparent disparity between the Eastern Church and the Western Church regarding celibacy of priests?

It seems to me that most people here have chosen to address the first possibility but not many have addressed the second.

I am more concerned with finding a deeper explanation of why giving up marriage for the sake of the Kingdom is far “better” than not doing so.

My problem isn’t so much with disparities of discipline between East and West…in fact, the part of the class I mentioned in my OP that I teach is a 10 min session in which I discuss Eastern Catholic (mostly Byzantine) understandings of whatever topic may be scheduled for that day.

Thank you for asking though.

 

[tinalewis]

I’m a long-happily-married middle aged woman who wanted to be a nun when I was a child.

I was talking with a nun about our jobs and she asked me what I’d do if I weren’t in my current line of work. I laughed and said I’d be a nun. She said that it isn’t always easy. I laughed again and told her that neither was marriage.

The point I’d like to make to OP is that life isn’t a breeze, no matter what vocation you’re called to. I feel the goal of all vocations is to serve our wonderful Lord to the best of our talents. I truly feel I would have loved to have been a nun (and I occasionally have wistful feelings about it, but even though I wasn’t a Catholic when I was in my 20’s), but honestly I feel I’m where I fit best in life: a married, child-free woman. We can dream of doing all sorts of things, but God knows us better than we know ourselves, and certainly beyond our likes and desires.

You’ll be in my prayers!

 

[Antonius_Lupus]

I’m a long-happily-married middle aged woman who wanted to be a nun when I was a child.

I was talking with a nun about our jobs and she asked me what I’d do if I weren’t in my current line of work. I laughed and said I’d be a nun. She said that it isn’t always easy. I laughed again and told her that neither was marriage.

The point I’d like to make to OP is that life isn’t a breeze, no matter what vocation you’re called to. I feel the goal of all vocations is to serve our wonderful Lord to the best of our talents. I truly feel I would have loved to have been a nun (and I occasionally have wistful feelings about it, but even though I wasn’t a Catholic when I was in my 20’s), but honestly I feel I’m where I fit best in life: a married, child-free woman. We can dream of doing all sorts of things, but God knows us better than we know ourselves, and certainly beyond our likes and desires.

You’ll be in my prayers!

Thank you for that…and thanks to everybody!

BTW, tinalewis, the date of my full Initiation was also April 22, 2008.

 

[Brendan]

This reminds me of military wives especially the wives of the Master Chiefs and officers wives who do so much to help other wives and their families while the men are on patrol. Their work is invaluable but they do not take on the title of their husbands. I can’t imagine calling the Master Chief’s wife a Master Chieftess.

In French and German military tradition, they wives of officers ARE addressed by their husband’s rank.

Frau Oberleutenant Schmidt or Madame Capitaine LaRue, for example

 

[nsper7]

There is the escatological reason, for in the end there are four things: death, judgment, heaven, and hell. “I tell you, brothers, the time is running out. From now on, let those having wives act as not having them, those weeping as not weeping, those rejoicing as not rejoicing, those buying as not owning, those using the world as not using it fully. For the world in its present form is passing away.” 1 Cor. 7:29-31. Like the wearing of black, it is appropriate that a priest live not only celibately but also in simplicity, detached from material wealth as well, as a radical witness that this world is passing away. Celibacy can be understood as an integral part of that detachment. In wearing black, a priest witnesses that he belongs solely to the world beyond marriage, because his life points to the world beyond death.

How does it work in terms of secular Priests and poverty/simplicity? After all, Priests are paid a salary (usually around $20K where I live, but that is on top of basically all their personal expenses being covered, so that is basically $20K for whatever the Priests wants). Does a Priest make a promise of simplicity, or only of celibacy and obedience (I know secular Priests are NOT under vows, only promises to their Bishop, right?).

 

[tinalewis]

BTW, tinalewis, the date of my full Initiation was also April 22, 2008.

Hey - given that information, I hope I get an invitation to your ordination!!!

 

[Antonius_Lupus]

Hey - given that information, I hope I get an invitation to your ordination!!!

Deo volente!

 

[aspirant]

What I want to know is if man is designed for the nuptial mystery, made to be an icon of the Divine Life in the family, and capable of co-creating rational persons made in the image of God with God: why then is clerical celibacy “better.”

I am not good at expressing this yet, but I will try my best.

In the resurrection, the nuptial meaning of our bodies will be fulfilled: God will be all in all, and we will have perfect communion with one another in the love of Christ.

Marriage, freely chosen and lived in charity, is a sanctifying sign of this future union with God, each spouse giving him- or herself entirely to the other. Marriage is not an end in itself, but foreshadows the life of the resurrection. In the resurrection, there will be no more need of sacraments to point the way.

Virginity and celibacy, freely received and chosen for the sake of the kingdom and lived in charity, already begins, here on earth, to reveal the fulfillment of the nuptial meaning of the body. Those who choose to follow Christ in the vocation to celibacy don’t just look forward to the resurrected life, they are already participating in it in a special way: they already begin to give themselves entirely to God and, in so doing, to all of us. They are doing, to the extent that they love, what married life points to. The one who gives himself entirely to God in this life shows us the life that awaits all Christians.

These two vocations, marriage and celibacy, are gifts that enlighten one another. Neither can be truly understood, at least in this life, without the other.

The vocation of marriage is good, the vocation of celibacy is better. It does not follow, however, that celibate people are better than married people. All married and celibate people need to remember that the measure of perfection is love. Every person, whether celibate or married, is capable of being perfected through love. Without love, all our vows are futile and empty.

For a much better explanation than I am able to give, I encourage everyone to check out Pope John Paul II’s Man & Woman He Created Them: A Theology of the Body, or at least a popularization like bookTheology of the Body for Beginners, bookTheology of the Body in Simple Language, or CDsCreated & Redeemed.

I hope that helps a little.