Although my family was never conventionally religious, I was exposed to Christianity frequently and from early on growing up in Britain in the 80s and 90s. My father was baptised as an Anglican but has never practised and has rarely set foot inside a church. My mother used to profess to be a Christian, although I never knew her to belong to a church. She attended various Protestant churches long before I existed and almost became a Catholic at one point. She has some odd ideas about religion and morality.
At school, we used to have assemblies at which we sang hymns and said prayers, and we would have occasional religious talks by the local priest. At secondary school, we had a visit from the Gideons, and we were all given a New Testament and Psalms. We also had a visit from Vijay Menon, a famous evangelist in the UK. We have compulsory religious education, and I also chose religious studies for GCSE and Christian theology for A-level. At university, we had a college chapel and a chaplain, as well as a university church, although I didn’t attend either with any regularity.
However, any interest that I may have had in Christianity remained dormant for some years. In my 30s, I had difficulty conceiving and also had several miscarriages in the second trimester, which I found quite traumatic, and I found myself feeling quite depressed and hopeless and bad that I was possibly going to be unable to provide my husband with a child.
Just before Christmas last year, I was with a very good friend of mine who is a Baptist (very much a practising one), and I told her just how unhappy I was about all of this. She said that she knew that I was not a Christian, but that she felt very strongly that she ought to pray for me there and then if I would allow her to. After praying for some specific things, she finished with a slightly adapted version of Philippians 4:7 and Numbers 6:23–27. I can only say that for the first time in months, I felt an indescribable sense of peace. I am also now pregnant again and assured that I can afford to be confident at this stage. I don’t know whether this is an actual miracle, but it seems like one to me.
After that experience at Christmas last year, I decided to read the New Testament from start to finish. What really struck me was the compelling personality of Jesus. I found myself deeply impressed by the wisdom and humanity of his moral teachings and way of life. I also began to appreciate for the first time the real meaning of the salvation that he offers us. As I have said elsewhere, I am not one of those people who is able to say exactly when and where I became a Christian, but over the past couple of months I have come to accept that what really started last Christmas was a gradual process of conversion. My friend was incredibly happy, but seemingly not entirely surprised, when I tentatively told her over a Zoom meeting that I thought I had actually become a Christian.
Of course, I still have much to learn and a long journey ahead of me. When things get back to normal, I want to join a church, and I would love to be baptised. For now, I am happy to have got to know Jesus.