Why I'm converting

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mdrummer5

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I’m very early in the process of converting to Catholicism. I’ve seen quite a few threads where I’ve found my story to be somewhat relevent so thought I would post a new thread explaining it in hopes that it helps anyone who is trying to convert someone.

Background: I grew up following the Jewish faith with a mother who converted from Southern Baptism. The church my grandparents used to attend very much followed the belief system that God is angry (imagine an angry little man screaming at you about God that looks like this :mad:). The few times I went with them going to church as a child was actually scary for me because I was openly told I would go to hell by everyone including members of my family because of my faith. Obviously not a good way to show someone God’s love. By the age of 14 I stopped going to synagogue (Jewish “church”) and up until a couple weeks ago considered myself to be agnostic. Then I talked to God for the first time in a long time. I apologized and asked for a sign of how to pursue faith. Within a week of that my girlfriend asked me if I wanted to attend Christmas Mass with her. Subtle… but a sign nontheless. I went and felt spiritual fulfillment I’d never known before. Monday I have an appointment to discuss RCIA 🙂

The reason I want to share this is because too many Christians try to convert people and I’m here to tell you as someone who was opposed to it most of his life… don’t actively try. just present it as an option. When someone is ready to open their heart to God they will. Trying to pressure them into it (even if you don’t think you are it’s probably perceived that way) will only drive them further away. When my girlfriend asked she said “Do you want to go to Christmas Mass?”. Had she said “I want you to”, “will you” or worst of all “you should” I’d have declined.

Now she wasn’t trying to convert me and doesn’t even know that I’ve decided to yet (don’t want her to think I’m doing it for her) I guess what I’m saying is if you want to try… consider your approach more thoroughly. After the Christmas Mass my girlfriend and I were talking about it and I explained what my thoughts were and she even said “I will not try to convert you, but if you have any questions feel free to ask.”

Present the path… don’t try to push anyone onto it.

Also, while no expert, given my previous views and fairly decent education in psychology (though not my career path) I am fairly well versed in how non-Christians view the idea of conversion so if anyone has any questions that I can possibly help with in terms of converting a loved one feel free to send me a private message. I will never try to convert anyone given my previous experience but given how good I feel about it can appreciate the idea of wanting to share that feeling.
 
Thank you for the solid and timely advice! And welcome home in advance.
 
I grew up with no religion in my family and went with a friend once or twice to Calvary Chapel at a his request. I liked the music, but that was it. I sent 47 years not thinking about God (probably agnostic). I also am not a fan of people trying to actively convert people, I don’t think it works too often and can have the opposite effect. For me it was a calling of the Holy Spirit that stirred me to start reading up on Christianity, and he planted a nagging desire in me to go to Church. It was not someone trying to convert me or even asking me to come to Church with them, I would not have responded to that. That does not mean that we can’t talk about our faith (especially when asked). I think it is important to try to live our faith so that we set a good example to others and maybe that will spur others to inquire about our faith.
 
CalCatholic said:
I grew up with no religion in my family and went with a friend once or twice to Calvary Chapel at a his request. I liked the music, but that was it. I sent 47 years not thinking about God (probably agnostic). I also am not a fan of people trying to actively convert people, I don’t think it works too often and can have the opposite effect. For me it was a calling of the Holy Spirit that stirred me to start reading up on Christianity, and he planted a nagging desire in me to go to Church. It was not someone trying to convert me or even asking me to come to Church with them, I would not have responded to that. That does not mean that we can’t talk about our faith (especially when asked). I think it is important to try to live our faith so that we set a good example to others and maybe that will spur others to inquire about our faith.
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Exactly. I can understand wanting to share the joy of faith as it truly is something that can’t be described to someone who hasn’t felt it but fear that while their intentions are good the people that do this are more than failing in their objective.
 
I agree. When I first started on the RCIA process I tried to convince my atheist boyfriend to join me, and he point-blank refused to so I backed off for a while. He’s gone from a militant atheist to someone who has become more spiritual - he’s following buddhist principles now, although he’s not strict. He also used to object to ever getting married to me in a Church if we got engaged, but now he’s happy to do that - even to go to RCIA as part of the pre-cana period if he has to. 🙂

It is true - the more you push, the more they push back. While I haven’t “converted” my boyfriend, I won’t try to. I do ask him if he wants to come to mass with me every now and then, but he declines. I don’t ask because I want to convert him, but I tell him it would be nice for him to go at least once to have some understanding about the CC. I hope hes thinking about it.
 
I agree whole heartedly with the caveat that if a person is in your Church than there are absolute truths in the form of Dogma and it is more charitable to be honest about those than to not be. For instance hemming and hawing over the Eucharist being the Real Body and Precious Blood would not be correct.
 
thank you for your testimony, I hope every one who has come here asking “How can I convert my husband/girlfriend/brother/co-worker/adult child” reads your advice and heeds it.

Welcome Home, your Jewish heritage puts you in the same position of the first apostles and disciples as they encountered Jesus Christ.
 
puzzleannie said:
thank you for your testimony, I hope every one who has come here asking “How can I convert my husband/girlfriend/brother/co-worker/adult child” reads your advice and heeds it.

Welcome Home, your Jewish heritage puts you in the same position of the first apostles and disciples as they encountered Jesus Christ.
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That’s my hope 🙂

As an update I informed my girlfriend yesterday after mass and she had the exact reaction I thought she would. She didn’t verbalize it right away but her initial reaction was fear that I was doing it for her. After I explained my thought process and how much reading and research I’ve done she realized that while she was instrumental in introducing me to faith she’s not the reason I’m pursuing it. I reminded her as we had previously discussed that both her and her parents were quite literally the first Christians that actually showed me that you don’t have to be a fanatical “everything is evil” person to believe in the teachings of Christ which was apparently very touching to them and made their day yesterday 🙂
 
mdrummer5 said:
That’s my hope 🙂

As an update I informed my girlfriend yesterday after mass and she had the exact reaction I thought she would. She didn’t verbalize it right away but her initial reaction was fear that I was doing it for her. After I explained my thought process and how much reading and research I’ve done she realized that while she was instrumental in introducing me to faith she’s not the reason I’m pursuing it. I reminded her as we had previously discussed that both her and her parents were quite literally the first Christians that actually showed me that you don’t have to be a fanatical “everything is evil” person to believe in the teachings of Christ which was apparently very touching to them and made their day yesterday 🙂
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I would suggest to that because of your past knowledge you will have more knowledge when it comes to Christ - after all many forget that Jesus was first and foremost a good, Jewish son who was well prophesized in the Old Testament.
 
We believe in the Holy Spirit–
the Lord and giver of Life!

Conversion is the work of the Holy Spirit–which is, God’s own Spirit on a mission to stimulate and love the spiritual soul within each person.

God is a gentleman–He woos, He doesn’t rape! May we all have such good courtly manners. 👍
 
kentuckyliz said:
God is a gentleman–He woos, He doesn’t rape! May we all have such good courtly manners. 👍
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Haha, I love that! New life policy, right there.

Thanks for this post; I’ve been looking for a new technique with my boyfriend. 👍
 
Thanks for sharing your story, mdrummer. That’s awesome. Indeed, God proposes, he does not impose.
 
+JMJ+

I came to know this thread from mdrummer5’s signature, and I have to agree with his/her experience: we should never push anyone into converting to Catholicism.

G.K. Chesterton, in his book The Catholic Church and Conversion, said that (apparently from experience) it is often that when a Protestant or pagan is ready to convert to Catholicism, “Only the word of a Catholic can keep him from Catholicism.” The Catholic layman can be too eager, or too combative, or even outright too hypocritical in proselytizing other people. On the other hand, he was quite surprised by the attitude of Catholic priests.

“It is quite false, in my experience, to say that Jesuits, or any other Roman priests, pester and persecute people in order to proselytise. Nobody has any notion of what the whole story is about, who does not know that, through those long and dark and indecisive days, it is the man who persecutes himself. The apparent inaction of the priest may be something like the statuesque stillness of the angler; and such an attitude is not unnatural in the functions of a fisher of men.”

(Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)

“Fisher of men”… THAT is the attitude we Catholics, and indeed all Christians, must have in evangelization.

God bless you, mdrummer, on your journey of faith, and thank you for sharing your story with us!
 
Today’s gospel reading provides great inspiration, too. Jesus tells us that we are the salt of the earth, and if we “go flat” we might as well be thrown out. Our actions more than anything should be what confirms someone to become Catholic.
 
In Bible study last week, we shared stories of how people tried to evangelize or save us. I live in central Appalachia–baptist, church of christ, stone-campbell movement, but mostly unchurched–but all are united in believing Catholics are damned. :eek:

They find out you’re Catholic and they start drooling. I feel like a boy wants me to be just the next notch in his steering wheel. :mad: I don’t want to be someone’s trophy convert.

I try to live out the gospel, be unselfconscious about my prayer and practice, and show forth the fruits. I hope to exude supernatural joy, peace, and love–more than any Christian who thinks I’m damned. 😃

I’m also considered to be the best or one of the best counselors around here–because I translate authentic Catholic understanding of the person into plain English, not-specifically-religious language, in a secular context. Applied Catholic wisdom. Even regarded as such by people who think I’m a damned Catholic. 👍 :eek:
 
The point I was driving at and forgot to say–a quote by St Francis of Assisi:

Preach the gospel always, and when necessary, use words.

I hope I live in a way that makes others think, “I want what she’s got!”
 
nuntym said:
+JMJ+

I came to know this thread from mdrummer5’s signature, and I have to agree with his/her experience: we should never push anyone into converting to Catholicism.

G.K. Chesterton, in his book The Catholic Church and Conversion, said that (apparently from experience) it is often that when a Protestant or pagan is ready to convert to Catholicism, “Only the word of a Catholic can keep him from Catholicism.” The Catholic layman can be too eager, or too combative, or even outright too hypocritical in proselytizing other people. On the other hand, he was quite surprised by the attitude of Catholic priests.

“It is quite false, in my experience, to say that Jesuits, or any other Roman priests, pester and persecute people in order to proselytise. Nobody has any notion of what the whole story is about, who does not know that, through those long and dark and indecisive days, it is the man who persecutes himself. The apparent inaction of the priest may be something like the statuesque stillness of the angler; and such an attitude is not unnatural in the functions of a fisher of men.”

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v505/theexpat/angler.jpg

“Fisher of men”… THAT is the attitude we Catholics, and indeed all Christians, must have in evangelization.

God bless you, mdrummer, on your journey of faith, and thank you for sharing your story with us!
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Thank you 🙂 Your addition to this thread is quite appreciated and the part I bolded very much sums up the issues I had with Christianity as a whole before deciding to convert.
 
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