Why the good suffer

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pelham

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I have a son who is handicapped. He ask why he should worship a God who has left him to suffer in his condition. He uses the example of Christ mixing spit with the dust and healing the blind man. If God has the power, why does he desert him? The free will argument doesn’t work.
 
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pelham:
I have a son who is handicapped. He ask why he should worship a God who has left him to suffer in his condition. He uses the example of Christ mixing spit with the dust and healing the blind man. If God has the power, why does he desert him? The free will argument doesn’t work.
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I would encourage him with alot of love to ask that question in prayer . I have seen some people with handicaps who have such incredible gifts to offer. If he has a bone to pick with the Lord I am sure he will recieve him with open arms. Perhaps he could ask the Lord what he has in mind for his unique talents.

-D
 
This is a hard one. Just look at the long length of time, our own Holy Father suffered. Most of our saints have suffered as well. All but one of our apostles died as martyrs to our faith. Christ doesn’t say to us, if you believe in me you will not suffer. In fact, he asks us to pick up our cross and follow him. He asks us to link our suffering with his…that’s called “redemptive suffering.” It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t say to God, please grant me a miracle. Miracles happen all the time, we just need to be opened to them. But when we put criteria on her belief system or try to bargain with God if he grants our requests…for example: Lord, please save me from my illness, and when you do, I will do X , Y And Z. It doesn’t work that way as well. Instead, Lord, help me to do your will! Just like Blessed Mother, be it done unto me according to your word! Those words are easier said, than done…and we especially may feel abandoned by God. Perhaps, getting your child a poster of Footprints in the Sand will help him when he is most needing a boost up. Also tell, him not to count his problems but his blessings. Boost his morale by nuturing the gifts and talents he currently has. And he has them no matter how crippled or infirmed his body is. Remember the late, youngster Mattie Stepanek who recently died of rare disease. His gift was poetry and peacemaking. Pray always. That’s the best answer and keep close to the Holy Eucharist. Because Jesus promised us “He who eats this bread and drinks this cup with have life eternal!” That’s the real reward.
 
Read Fr. Groeschel’s book, “Arise from Darkness.” This is dealt with masterfully there. I recommend you read it, and after you depending on his age, of your son.
 
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pelham:
I have a son who is handicapped. He ask why he should worship a God who has left him to suffer in his condition. He uses the example of Christ mixing spit with the dust and healing the blind man. If God has the power, why does he desert him? The free will argument doesn’t work.
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speak to him about his personal goodness. ask him to consider his own temperment and regard for other people. ask him if he is sensitive and compassionate, whether he has a special regard for people’s feeling, hardships, etc. point out to him that able-bodied people often take everything for granted, and turn out shallow, etc. by showing him his own uniqueness in God’s eyes, and that every life has it’s advantages and disadvantages, he will find God’s value of him in himself. help him to see that he not only has uniqueness in his own esteem, but that that uniqueness is a benefit to others too. tell him how his problems have helped you to develop as a person. while being disabled is difficult for you and him, point out what you feel you would have lost, had the Lord made it otherwise. be thankful toward him.

you cannot ‘make’ him love and worship God, but you can prepare him to approach the Lord himself. he can’t love God if he doesn’t respect him. i think our first response to God is gratitude. teach him that even though he sees the ease of others’ lives, he has his uniqueness to be grateful for.

ask him to reflect on what kind of person he wants to be. ask him if he wants to be comfortable with who he is and if he wants to make the most of the life he has. tell him that that will be God’s gift to him as he develops a relationship with him. remind him that he shouldn’t get caught up in seeing his own limitations. God doesn’t see our various conditions as limitations. if he gives himself to God, he will become limitless, beyond what he can see right now. there is more to being truly human than being able-bodied. use the elderly, who slowly become disabled, as examples of the depth of the human spirit.

the questions and difficulties that he has can only be answered by God. if he really wants the answers, then he’ll need to ask Him. when he confronts you with these questons, remind him that these things are between him and the Father. you need to give the space to approach God on his own. the Most Blessed Trinity does not disappoint. trust Him and pray.

even if your son doesn’t turn to the Lord, he needs to reflect on these things anyhow. he must come to terms with his life and its conditions. if he doesn’t, he’ll have a life of bitterness. you can guide him and encourage him, but you cannot do it for him. don’t expect him to make changes immediately; healing takes time. don’t expect him to demonstrate his changes to you. let it all be private between him and God. this may be the only thing that he can truly do on his own. as hard as it may be, give him the chance to do that. God has not deserted him. He is waiting for him.

may Christ Jesus carry this burden with you,

john
 
I ask myself that same question everyday…why do bad things happen to good people???
I rack my brain for an answer!
 
Suffering is one of the greatest mysteries of our faith. Why would a good God allow suffering? Maybe something better can come out of it, and I like to think that it can, since Christ died and gave us eternal life through suffering. Since Christ saved us (us meaning human kind generically, not us as in “all of us”) through suffering, that suggests that holiness is acheived through suffering.

If you look at suffering biologically, say for instance, a wound, you realize it has a protective/redemptive function. The cut heals to its original form through pain and suffering. I believe suffering in and of itself is to protect us, to atone for our sins, to call us to God, and to bring us back to our original sinless form (or perhaps better.)

The question here becomes subjective, why do “I” suffer. Why “me?” Generally speaking, suffering realigns us with God. John Paul II the Great said that personal suffering exists to draw out the greater love of those around the sufferer.

In human terms, this may seem unfair,as your son’s condition exemplifies. However, on God’s terms, your son’s suffering may make him more holy than a healthy human being, simply because his condition draws out the compassion of those around him (not to mention the purgation aspect.) He may not want that sympathy or even despise it, but nevertheless, the love for him swells based on his condition.

People around him essentially become “Good Semaritans” i.e. he is drawing out their Godliness. In a way, he is living out the Golden Rule because he draws people closer to Christ without any effort, since they are drawn by his condition to holiness. His condition is a calling to those around him to be Christ like.

To do unto others as you would have them do unto you is a vocation he lives daily because he does unto others what we all should do unto others, bring them closer to Christ.

Personally, it is difficult for me to write about suffering since God has blessed me so much. I have never suffered as intensly as your son, so its easy for me to say such things. Maybe I’m a hypocrite, I don’t know.

But I do know that when I suffer, I always offer it to God as atonement for my sins. There’s my armchair theologians guess as to what you could tell your son.
 
Jesus and Paul both made the point that many people were lepers, blind, lame, dead, possessed, but that Jesus only healed certain ones. All his miracles and healings were done for the purpose of the kingdom, for establishing his authority and divinity. Those who were not healed were left in their condition for the sake of the kingdom. In other words, the condition to which you are born is the condition to which God has determined you are to find Him and progress spiritually to union with him. To the extent that your condition involves disorder, pain etc., that is the result of sin – not your personal sin, but original sin, the inherited sinful state of mankind and the corporate sin of all humanity. God always surmounts sin, and enables you to do so but only through complete reliance on his grace. God bless your son, who has been granted access to extraordinary grace by virtue of his condition.
 
Tell your son he is blessed. Christ suffered more than we can imagine, in a manner that only God-as-Man could muster. When we suffer, we are united with Christ in a way that we simply can’t be when we are well. God saw the strength in your son’s soul, saw his worthiness, and gave him a place much closer to Christ than most people get.

God did not spare His Son the Cross, and Jesus accepted it willingly. Your son has been given a similar cross to bear, and this is a sign of God’s favor and respect for your son’s strength of spirit.
 
Why suffering is here is very difficult to answer. There is a book by a rabbi called Why bad things happen to good people.

I tell my kids, bad things happen here becasue this is NOT Heaven, horrible things occur because this is earth. It is imperfect. IF everything was fine and dandy then this would be Heaven instead.

The other point I may mention is that some folks say, God never gives us more than we can handle. You son is somone special, he has the ability to be able to overcome his handicap(s).

He may have some physical limitations, but he may have more insight than others, he may have more determination to achive and overcome his limitations.

If you look at Steven Hawkings, he is wheel chair bound, but his mind is sharper than most folks on the planet.

Some people have all the physical gifts in the world, but waste it. They may get into drugs or waste their lives away in depression, or maybe even in self indulgence. Some rock stars get success so fast and so easy, that they easily become overwhelmed by the fame and fortune.

It’s not what you start out with, it’s what you do with what you are given. For those who are given much, much is expected of them.

To be able to overcome his handicaps, that in itself would be a great accomplishment. To do good things while overcoming great obstacles, that would be a lifetime of high achievement.

For someone on the other end, a Micheal Jackson, who was given so much early on in life and to sink to such low esteem, is a life of wasted and pitiful self indulgence.

wc
 
Hello Pellham,

Have you read the book of job in the bible?

Job produces love and faithfulness to God when things are going good. Satan says to God, “Well sure! When everything is going good Job loves You. Take that away and he will hate You.” God allows Satan to take away everything good in his life and reduce his health to ruble. Job remains faithful to God even when he looses everything.

It is Job’s faithfulness to God even when all his possessions, family and health are gone which is a far greater gift of love for God than Job’s faithfulness to God when things are going good.

In the Kingdom of God the last shall be first. Your son faithfully living through life handicaped will have a far greater treasure of faith and love for God in eternal life than those who were never put to the test in such a way.

NAB 1PETER 1:6There is cause for rejoicing here. You may for a time have to suffer the distress of many trials; but this is so that your faith, which is more precious than the passing splendor of fire-tried gold, may by its genuineness lead to praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ appears.

Peace in Christ,

Steven Merten
www.ILOVEYOUGOD.com
 
This is such a tough question, fundamental to our struggle on earth. I don’t have the answers, but here are a couple points.

This reminded me of the passage in the Gospels when there was a blind man. Many people of Jesus’ day thought when someone was born with a physical imperfection such as blindness, that his parents must have sinned to merit that. When Jesus was questioned about why God would have permitted this man to be blind, his response was “so that the greater glory of God might be revealed.” That is an incredibly beautiful passage to me and one that really counteracts the message we get today in our world. The world would say someone with a disability is somehow not a whole person - but that’s not what God says. He says your son is able to more fully express His glory in ways that other people could not. I realize that I don’t know the ins and outs of daily living with a disability, but I’d encourage you to take a look at the Gospels and pray about what Jesus has to tell you.

Second, suffering can be an amazing experience in that it brings us closer to Christ because we can share in his suffering. A college professor once told our class that he prayed for suffering because it brought him closer to Christ and made him depend more fully on God. Since I’ve done that, my experience has been similar. Tough, but amazing. God bless.
 
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