Lent isn’t really about showing how “in control” we are.
I believe the emphasis these days is simply doing the orindinary things well in our state of life.
Lent can very much be about doing penance for the Lord, if you have the right mindset.
Priests these days are trying to de-emphasize the concept of “giving something up” because most people doing it do not have the right mindset (e.g. “I am offering this penance for the Lord”) and also, most people fail at their efforts to give up chocolate or smoking or whatever it is.
The Enchiridion of Indulgences contains a general grant of partial indulgence for " the faithful, who
in a spirit of penance voluntarily deprive themselves of what is licit and pleasing to them." The grant of an indulgence shows that the Church wants to encourage this activity, as long as it is done in the mindset stated, and under the conditions stated. As for showing how “in control” I am, I do not feel “in control” at all when I am doing a prolonged “give-up” fast like the one I am doing right now for Nineveh 90. The reason is that many times in my life before I started focusing on the holy, I tried to do this and I was not “in control” and couldn’t keep it up more than about 3 weeks. I also didn’t see any point to it.
But when I am offering it to the Lord, to Him be the glory because he helps me consistently do, or come pretty close to the mark, on what I need to do, and it is helping me spiritually and probably physically as well as showing my love for the Lord. I’m pretty sure the only reason I would even be able to think about keeping this up for 90 days would be for the Lord and/or love of neighbor (such as getting souls out of purgatory, donating to charity the money otherwise spent on snacks, etc. ) When I’m doing it for somebody else, it’s easier to do. When I’m just doing it for me, I reach “who cares?” point really fast.
I have no problem with somebody choosing another penance that better fits their situation, but right now, this one fits mine.
