Why your spouse?

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rayne89

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What are the reasons that made you decide to marry your spouse?

Were their certain character traits? Did you know the kind of person you wanted to marry and that’s what you were looking for? Or did you just have a chemistry between you? Was it practical or emotional or both? Did you religion play a part?

Please share whatever you like.
 
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rayne89:
What are the reasons that made you decide to marry your spouse?

Were their certain character traits? Did you know the kind of person you wanted to marry and that’s what you were looking for? Or did you just have a chemistry between you? Was it practical or emotional or both? Did you religion play a part?

Please share whatever you like.
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I knew what I was looking for. I was immediately attracted to what was going to be my future husband because he was (still is) handsome and sexy. Adventurous, hardly ever a dull moment. Married for more than 40 years. He is totally faithful, good provider, always lets me know where he goes or where he is. Not deceitful, tells me practically anything personal of him, good or bad. Friends, relatives and others love and respect him.

At the time I got to know him, religion did not play a part in considering him as a husband. He at the time considered himself Protestant. But when the time came we had decided to marry, I had made up my mind to marry in the Catholic Church. I was resolute in my decision that in case he would not agree, I would not marry him. Apparently God thought he was the right one for me, because my fiancee at that time did not put up a fuss. He went willingly to the pre-nuptial classes and signed the form that I was allowed to raise any children in the Catholic Faith, and we married in the Catholic Church.

The strange part is that many of our points of view are totally opposite. Same in matters of taste. The chemistry is there, but not when it comes to agreeing on many subjects. Typically: Men are from Mars and Women from Venus. I wish we were more of a kindred spirit, especially in matters spiritual.

I am not complaining. BTW, these old fogies still flirt with each other.

It’s a good thing we received the Sacrament of Marriage. I credit it that our marriage has endured and probably will “Till death do us part.”
 
I knew there was something special about my future husband when I met him but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. 😉 We actually met where I worked and we had lunch together a few times, talked when we could (ok, flirted) but we both were kinda shy and quiet so we weren’t really getting anywhere…then I agreed to go on a couple dates with this other guy, who was perfectly nice, but the whole time I was on a date with him…it was so odd, I couldn’t think of anyone but you know who. 🙂 Same when I went out with my friends-if I danced with someone else I almost felt like I was cheating because, I think I knew in my heart that he was the one I wanted to be with - and I knew he liked me too. (word gets around at work, you know how it is). I think I was almost a little scared, and surprised at myself, that I liked a guy thaaat much. But, we had to be together. I truly and honestly believe that God sent me my husband. He is the sweetest, kindest, gentlest, most caring man I have ever met…and he’s pretty darn good looking too. 😃

As far as religion goes, he is not Catholic, but is very respectful of my beliefs and has no problem with raising our future kids Catholic. Actually, we just had our marriage convalidated this month, I’m ecstatic about that. He asks questions a lot and seems to be pretty interested in Catholicism so, I pray for his conversion often.
So, I never thought I would be married at 20, but God had awesome plans in store for me!

smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_3_18.gif
Sorry about the long post but I like telling this story 🙂
 
I figured that I had petter hurry up and tie her down before she got away, there is no way I would ever be able to get such a beautiful woman ever again! Must have got lucky.
😃
 
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rayne89:
What are the reasons that made you decide to marry your spouse?

Were their certain character traits? Did you know the kind of person you wanted to marry and that’s what you were looking for? Or did you just have a chemistry between you? Was it practical or emotional or both? Did you religion play a part?

Please share whatever you like.
Click to expand...
Religion - Drew us…was helping him discern a Vocation…

Chemistry - YES…:whistle:

Good Character - Respectful…kind to children, the elderly, the less fortunate and animals…and my children liked him…

Reminds me of my father - I loved my father very much :love:
 
…as hokey as it sounds, i knew it the moment i saw her…👍

…and she was a staunch southern bapbist… still is…!
 
i married my husband, because he was the most wonderful person i had ever known. he was kind, careing, patient, gentle, tender and funny. we had similar goals in life and i just adored him. i always wanted to be near him and couldnt stand it when he was away (we lived three hours from each other) he also was the first person who ever put me first. it was hard to adjust to that since no one had ever done that before, and he did. it felt amazing to be loved like that, and to love that person right back. plus he cooks and i cant! the most attractive thing about him though was his big heart and good nature. he was a special education teacher, and a scout troop leader. he never met someone he wasnt willing to help. whenever we go out to eat if theres left overs, he drives around until he can find a homeless person to give it to. i adore him for that. a heart of gold.
 
I married my husband because there is never a dull moment with him. He has the most hilarious sense of humour of anyone I’ve ever met. He keeps me laughing which is what I need sometimes. We’re best friends and can’t do anything with out the other. We even can finish eachother’s sentences, which friends think is really weird. He’s also so affectionate. I’ve noticed with friends that the guys aren’t all that mushy and romantic, but my husband always holds my hand, gives me hugs all the time. My favorite is when we’re at a store and looking at something, he’ll always give me a kiss on the head (he’s a foot taller than me). It’s so sweet and makes me feel really special. We can also be completely silent, he’ll be playing a video game in one room and I’ll be reading a book in another, but we’ll still feel the comfort of each other. He’s just a great guy. Plus, my last name used to be awful and long, and his is nice and short. It was a bonus!!
 
/Plus, my last name used to be awful and long, and his is nice and short. It was a bonus!!/

Sarc, same here, lol! It’s wayyyy easier. 🙂
 
He is many wonderful things–caring, funny, bright, hard-working, sexy–but one important thing I haven’t seen mentioned is that I respected him so much that I was willing to do things his way even when I thought he was wrong and not say “I told you so” if they didn’t work out.

I also trust him absolutely. He has since run up such a positive emotional bank account that I think I would forgive him anything.

He is both down-to-earth and possessing of a dignity that makes me proud to be with him in any company.

We started dating when he was over thirty. Why no one nabbed him before I did is beyond me. I am one lucky woman.
 
Wow, thanks for all the responses!

The idea for this post came into my head because on the forum I noticed several different posts where are husband and wife were “not on the same page” so to speak. Differences in personality, in child rearing ideas, finances - and some bigger moral issues. I also noticed some posts where people have a certain “criteria” for what kind of spouse they are looking for/ looked for.

I married my spouse for love. When we decided to get married he had no car, no job, and was living with an Aunt. Granted he had just enlisted in the Navy - so there was prospective security on the horizon.

While I was dating at the ripe old age of 17 I told my bestfriend I would even live in a box with my husband as long as we were together. I was insanely in love. And I do mean insane. There was no rationalizing with me. We both had difficult home lives and being there for each other really bonded us.

At 18 I did marry him, against the advise of even my closest friends (and my parents.) We had about 8 years or so where we had to work out all the garbage-the big issues. And there were big isssues. Baggage from our childhood, addictions, depression -all kinds of fun stuff.

And now here we are married 14 years, and I am insanely in love with my husband. We are who we were in highschool except more mature and secure. What did I see in him from the start? He has a good heart - not a mean bone in his body. He lets me be who I am and has never asked me to change. He stands behind me and supports me. He respects me - has never called me a negative name, never belittled me -which is a big deal to me because that’s all I saw heard growing up. And he ain’t bad looking either. 🙂 He is an amazing dad -everything his own father was not.

I consider myself very lucky. God gave us the grace to get thru all the garbage. Someone on the forum mentioned her marriage was like the wine at the wedding at Cana - God saved the best stuff for last. That’s us.

Besided those on the forum, people I know, people I work with -sometimes when they tell me things that go on in their marriage. How they are treated or how they treat their spouse. I wonder what made them decide to marry? Did they know each other long? Did they see qualities in the person they liked? Did they marry the first person who asked them to marry them because they didn’t want to be alone? Were they really in love with the person or really with the idea of being married?

I realize no marriage is perfect, trust me I know. I realize that marriage is hard work. But some peoples marriages just make me so sad. I pray for those who have painful marriages.

I love reading everyone’s story by the way. Thanks for sharing.
 
I married mine because he was, and is my best friend. He was the first and only human being I have ever known who truly loved ME, at least as much as he loves himself, and looked out for me.

I was in a bad situation with my family, and he rescued me and has been there for me ever since.

20 yrs and counting!

cheddar
 
I knew he was the one way back in 7th grade. He was the first boy I kissed. Even though we both dated others during High School, we both knew we were for each other. I played organ at Mass, he was an altar boy. For some reason, whenever I practiced at church, he seemed to be there;)

We’ve been married for almost 19 years and have weathered many storms. I still feel butterflies when I see his car in the driveway when I come home.
 
I met him while I was volunteering at an orphanage in Guatemala. At the time I was trying to discern whether or not I had a calling to the religious life. My friends and family had given me mostly negative reactions over the idea of me becoming a nun. I received a barrage of comments like “You’re so smart. Why would you waste yourself like that…” and frankly was beginning to wish I’d kept my discernment thoughts to myself.

Anyhow, after a few weeks in Guatemala, a new friend (and my future husband) started making it clear he would like to date me and when I realized that’s what was going on, I immediately told him “Please don’t waste your time. I am very seriously thinking about becoming a nun.”

His reply?

“What a beautiful thought! I admire you very much for wanting to dedicate your life to something so grand.”

He was the first man I ever met who considered reading his favorite psalms aloud to me to be a “nice evening together.”

So, ironically, his sweet words of encouragement to me regarding the religious life helped me to see that I was being called to be a wife and mother instead! =)
 
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contemplative:
Catholic
Italian
Loving
Smart
Good lookin’
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Same for me, except for the Italian part.

There was also one other little influence that kind of “pushed” the issue. In hindsight, if that’s what it took, then let God heal us of that sin rather than allowing us to rewrite history and prevent it! All things work together for His glory! Our “shotgun” wedding at the courthouse has since been blessed by the Church, and given us an incredible family with six wonderful kids!

Alan
 
Catholic

Wanted a large family

Good at fixing things (no repairmen in our house!)

Smart

Good provider

—KCT
 
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