Hello Everyone,
I need a bit of advise… It has been a few months now that I promised to visit some family members [this involves, staying with them for the weekend].
Now I normally go to a saturday evening mass, and If I miss that, I proceed to the sunday morning mass.
PROBLEM IS. The family members will be making preparations for me to come over on a friday evening and stay with the for the entire weekend. I will feel wrong to change the date, because the visit has already been postponed time and time again over the course of a few months, as there were issues with my schedule, changing the visit date AGAIN will cause “issues”.
NOW, these family members live in a fairly “distant” place, so public transportation will be unavailable for me to travel to a nearest Catholic church for a mass. Some of you will be thinking that the family could give me a lift to the nearest church, but that just would not happen BECAUSE, these family members are hardcore protestants, and would much rather taking me to their own protestant church> which they attend on both saturdays and sundays.
Asking them to take me to a Catholic church would be problematic for a few reasons:
1] After all I am going to be spending time with them for two days, so refusing to go to church with them, and attend mass INSTEAD would be intrusive and offensive to them.
2] I am just not able to argue about the protestant - catholic debate they will bring up If I ask them for a lift, the family situation is very delicate as I have not seen them for years, and religous arguments surfacing would not be pleasant.
3] There are more complications, mostly family issues which could complicate things> with one of them being the fact that they are the ones who baptised me as a protestant, many years ago when I was around age 5, AND they also know that I am a Catholic now, but are not very happy about it.
So, considering this> would missing mass this weekend be a sin? Should I just stick out visiting them, going to church with them and then attend a mass on the following monday when I leave their house? OR will attending a Friday Evening mass, before they pick me up at 8pm work as a one- time replacement for missing mass on saturday or sunday [considering all the complications]?
I would appreciate some advise. Thank you!
As others have said, I would email a priest and ask if you are unsure of what to do. Many people here are not going to understand your situation and will give you bad or wrong advice. I can’t answer for you either because I am not the one in the situation and I don’t know the people and I don’t know what you are up against but…
We must always do our best to make it to mass and not skip but at times there are circumstances and I can relate to the situation you’re in that I have protestant family who lives in a very remote area of the midwest and there is one Catholic church with the next being over an hour away as it is a heavily protestant area. This Catholic church has one mass per weekend and none during the week. We visit about two to three times per year, because they are close relatives and at times it is very difficult to make it to the mass, especially in the winter.
I, also understand how it is very easy for others to say to you, just stand up and tell them you are going to the Catholic church. Confrontation is not always easy and usually easier said than done. People can push pretty hard and get pretty upset when it comes to religion and get pretty insistent, so I can see where you would probably be uncomfortable asking them to take you, especially if they are already unhappy about your being Catholic and they are all headed some where else. You are probably a little leery of what type of reactions it would cause and if everyone else there is protestant and you are the only Catholic that is a very difficult situation to be in. You also sound young (I am not sure) but if this family is your parents or very close relatives that can make the situation even harder.
Again, I can’t answer for you but here it was asked similarly and answered by an apologist on this website.
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=62351
I would pray very much about the situation and ask our Lord to give you wisdom and ask for the Holy Spirit’s guidance and see what He does to help you in this situation. You might try a novena to the Holy Spirit for guidance.
God is a big God and as the saying goes, if He brought you to it, He will bring you through it.
And last when you can’t make it to mass I would make a spiritual communion. St. Thomas Aquinas called this: “an ardent desire to receive Jesus in the Most Holy Sacrament and in lovingly embracing Him.”
Act of Spiritual Communion
by St. Alphonsus Liguori (A.D. 1696-1787)
My Jesus, I believe that Thou art present in the Blessed Sacrament. I love Thee above all things and I desire Thee in my soul. Since I cannot now receive Thee sacramentally, come at least spiritually into my heart. As though thou wert already there, I embrace Thee and unite myself wholly to Thee; permit not that I should ever be separated from Thee.
Act of Spiritual Communion
O Immaculate Queen of Heaven and Earth, Mother of God and Mediatrix of every grace: I believe that Thy dearly beloved Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, is truly, really, and substantially contained in the Most Blessed Sacrament. I love Him above all things and I long to receive Him into my heart. Since I cannot now receive Him sacramentally, be so good as to place Him spiritually in my soul.
O my Jesus, I embrace Thee as One who has already come, and I unite myself entirely to Thee. Never permit me to be separated from Thee. Amen.