Woman raised in homosexual household speaks against same-sex marriage

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Woman raised in homosexual household speaks against same-sex marriage

Ottawa, Aug. 26, 2005 (CNA) - A Canadian woman who grew up in a homosexual household in Toronto in the 60s and 70s says same-sex marriage does not respect or protect the rights and best interests of children. Dawn Stefanowicz said as a child she was at high risk of exposure to contagious STDs due to sexual molestation, her father’s high-risk sexual behaviors, and multiple partners. She shared her personal story and her position on same-sex marriage in a statement at a pro-family rally in Ottawa on Parliament Hill in April.

Her father, who was molested by older males as a child, lived with depression, control issues, anger outbursts, suicidal tendencies and sexual compulsions. He died of AIDS in 1991.

Stefanowicz, who cared deeply for her father, noted that growing up in a gay household exposed her to "bathhouse sex, cross-dressing, sodomy, pornography, gay nudity, lesbianism, bisexuality, minor recruitment, voyeurism, and exhibitionism.” In addition, she said, “Sadomasochism was alluded to and aspects demonstrated. Alcohol and drugs were often contributing factors to lower inhibitions in my father’s relationships.”

After two decades of exposure to these behaviors, she became insecure, depressed, suicidal and confused over her own sexuality.

“I did not see the value of biological complementing differences of male and female or think about marriage. I made vows to never have children since I had not grown up in a safe, sacrificial, child-centered home environment,” she said.

“I can tell you that I suffered long term in this situation and this has been professionally documented … I witnessed that every other family member suffered severely as well … My gender identity, psychological well being, and peer relationships were affected.”

According to Stefanowicz, children should not be subjected to such an environment. “Same-sex marriage will put the human rights of the individual in a higher place than what is best for society, families and especially children.”

Stefanowicz says her experience is not that uncommon. She said research and personal testimonies indicate that children do best with both a mother and a father in a lifelong marriage bond. “Children need responsible monogamous parents who have no extramarital sexual partners. Parental promiscuity, abuse and divorce are not good for children.

“Children need consistent appropriate boundaries and secure expressions of emotional intimacy that are not sexualized in the home and community,” she wrote.

In addition, legalized same-sex marriage will provide “a direct legal entranceway of indoctrination, desensitization, personal and political recruitment of our vulnerable children by some gay activists within our schools while silencing all students who oppose the gay agenda.

“We have an obligation, for the sake of our children, to speak freely and to direct the laws of our land,” she wrote.

Stefanowicz is currently writing her biography, soon to be published.

For her full statement, go to: http://www.citizenimpact.ca/issues/defn_marriage/ssm_children.html

http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/new.php?n=4731
 
She wasnt just raised in a homosexual household…she was raised in a perverted, promiscuous, abusive household. No child, regardless of their parents orientation, should be exposed to ANY of that. That’s totally different than two loving, non perverted (I know some of you think homosexuality is perverted but Im talking about molestation), no promoiscuos homosexual parents. Regardless of whether you think homosexuality is wrong, this is not an example of all homosexual homes. Her father was obviously a disgusting, abusive person, who shouldntve been allowed to have a child.
 
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siamesecat:
She wasnt just raised in a homosexual household…she was raised in a perverted, promiscuous, abusive household. No child, regardless of their parents orientation, should be exposed to ANY of that. That’s totally different than two loving, non perverted (I know some of you think homosexuality is perverted but Im talking about molestation), no promoiscuos homosexual parents. Regardless of whether you think homosexuality is wrong, this is not an example of all homosexual homes. Her father was obviously a disgusting, abusive person, who shouldntve been allowed to have a child.
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…She said research and personal testimonies indicate that children do best with both a mother and a father in a lifelong marriage bond. “Children need responsible monogamous parents who have no extramarital sexual partners. Parental promiscuity, abuse and divorce are not good for children…
 
I agree with siamesecat. What this woman went through is horrid, but exposure to sexual perversion could happen in a straight household, too! Yes, children should have a mom and a dad–that is the way God designed it, but using this extreme example doesn’t prove the point that children don’t belong in a homosexual/lesbian household.
 
Just to make it clear—I do not support children being raised by two “parents” of the same sex. But I think that this is an extreme example of a homosexual household and doesn’t help our position.
 
I don’t agree with same-sex “marriage,” but this article paints with a very broad brush. If she’s to be believed, the women who raised her should be in jail for pedophilia and child abuse. Proponents of traditional marriage would be taken more seriously if they didn’t use the most extreme cases to make their point. To equate all homosexuals with this behavior would be like saying that Joe Smith over there beats his wife, therefore all men beat their wives.
 
"Dawn’s statement is the most powerful indictment I’ve ever seen on the dangers of homosexual adoption and parenting. It will be argued that children can be equally at risk in heterosexual, monogomous homes, at the hands of cruel and incompetent parents, and while that is true, there is an inherently immoral foundation in the homes of homosexuals, whose lifestyles center around sexuality."

catholicnewsagency.com/new.php?n=4731
 
Without doubt you can find millions of people who were brought up in religious families and institutions who speak out against them.

Oh, and the same holds true for ‘normal’ families too.
 
“Dawn’s statement is the most powerful indictment I’ve ever seen on the dangers of homosexual adoption and parenting. It will be argued that children can be equally at risk in heterosexual, monogomous homes, at the hands of cruel and incompetent parents, and while that is true, there is an inherently immoral foundation in the homes of homosexuals, whose lifestyles center around sexuality.”

catholicnewsagency.com/new.php?n=4731
 
I agree, this household and this one woman’s experience a aren’t exactly probably totally representative of everyone’s experience growing up with gay parents. I’m not in favor of gay adoption, but the fact is a lot of gay people have their own biological kids anyways. Some of them probably do a fairly decent job of providing stability for their kids, even if their whole arrangement is bizarre by our standards. In other areas maybe they do okay. And if they live in a part of the country where it’s accepted, maybe the kids don’t feel like total freaks.

So, in other words, the testimony of one screwed up person with deranged, depraved parents isn’t exactly a scientific study. I know hetero people who were exposed to disgusting stuff too, and in fact my own father propositioned me when I was 17 and it really affected me. Other people have parents who are drug addict prostitutes, meth heads, or gang bangers.
 
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HelpingHands:
I agree, this household and this one woman’s experience a aren’t exactly probably totally representative of everyone’s experience growing up with gay parents. I’m not in favor of gay adoption, but the fact is a lot of gay people have their own biological kids anyways. Some of them probably do a fairly decent job of providing stability for their kids, even if their whole arrangement is bizarre by our standards. In other areas maybe they do okay. And if they live in a part of the country where it’s accepted, maybe the kids don’t feel like total freaks.

So, in other words, the testimony of one screwed up person with deranged, depraved parents isn’t exactly a scientific study. I know hetero people who were exposed to disgusting stuff too, and in fact my own father propositioned me when I was 17 and it really affected me. Other people have parents who are drug addict prostitutes, meth heads, or gang bangers.
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I agree that this woman’s experience does not represent everyone growing up with homosexual parents. I just thought it was an interesting article and perspective, because it’s not often that we hear from people who were raised in such a situation, so I was curious to see how people would react to it.
 
Just to make it clear—I do not support children being raised by two “parents” of the same sex. But I think that this is an extreme example of a homosexual household and doesn’t help our position.
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it is not extreme. that is the reality of homosexuality!!!
 
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spacecadet:
it is not extreme. that is the reality of homosexuality!!!
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you really must be a space cadet. You honsetly believe that this goes on in the home of every single solitary homosexual? I was disgusted by the actions of this father, but by no means do I place the blame on every homosexual because of what this man did. That would be like saying that all straight men are insane murderes because the Son of Sam was too.
Have you ever actaully met a gay person in your life?
 
I find it interesting that when homosexual marriage is portrayed in the papers they always march out the “committed homosexual” couples who have been together for ten years. How is that any different than this woman sharing her testimony of a horrid experience with homosexual parents? Both are extremes.

I would advise to you to read the Catholic Answers Report on Homosexual Marriage. I believe there is sufficient data in there to counter the idea that homosexual lifestyle is not dangerous to our society.

How would I suggest we counter this destructive lifestyle? We need to have a lot of tough love and honest education of course. To blindly dismiss what this woman has gone through as an extreme case might allow people to rationalize homosexuality as just another harmless lifestyle, but it buries a lot of truth of its destructive consequences.
 
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AntonV:
I find it interesting that when homosexual marriage is portrayed in the papers they always march out the “committed homosexual” couples who have been together for ten years. How is that any different than this woman sharing her testimony of a horrid experience with homosexual parents? Both are extremes.

I would advise to you to read the Catholic Answers Report on Homosexual Marriage. I believe there is sufficient data in there to counter the idea that homosexual lifestyle is not dangerous to our society.

How would I suggest we counter this destructive lifestyle? We need to have a lot of tough love and honest education of course. To blindly dismiss what this woman has gone through as an extreme case might allow people to rationalize homosexuality as just another harmless lifestyle, but it buries a lot of truth of its destructive consequences.
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So what do you consider to be the “norm” in homosexuality if wild drugged-up sex parties and well-mannered committed couples are both extremes? It’s unbelieveable to me how many will generalize based upon what someone esle has told them about gay people and never think to get an opinion of thier own. Yes, there are wildly promiscuous gay people out there. But guess what, there are even more wilidly promiscuous straight people. I feel like a lot of people on this forum think that gay people are the root of all evil and its simply not true.
 
The statistical reality is that homosexuals do have a higher rate of all kinds of social ills, such as drug abuse, promiscuity, mental illness and suicide. Don’t forget, the catechism says it’s a disorder. We don’t know what causes it, but these people tend to be more troubled than heterosexuals.
 
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soulspeak23:
Yes, there are wildly promiscuous gay people out there. But guess what, there are even more wilidly promiscuous straight people.
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That’s only because heterosexuals account for about 97% of the population. Thus, there are a lot more straight people with blond hair, Toyotas, and calicos as well.

In terms of comparision, homosexuals as a group exhibit much higher rates of sexual promiscuity, drug abuse, mental illness, domestic violence, and child abuse than do heterosexuals as a group. For example, the rate of child abuse in households headed by homosexuals are 20 times higher than the rate of child abuse in households headed by heterosexuals.

The woman’s case under discussion is indeed extreme, but it is much more likely to be the sort of thing that happens when one’s parents are homosexual than when they’re not.

– Mark L. Chance.
 
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mlchance:
For example, the rate of child abuse in households headed by homosexuals are 20 times higher than the rate of child abuse in households headed by heterosexuals.
– Mark L. Chance.
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That’s because you consider a child even being in the home of a homosexual to be child abuse.
 
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soulspeak23:
That’s because you consider a child even being in the home of a homosexual to be child abuse.
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Wow, you’re an over-the-internet mind-reader!

http://home.houston.rr.com/mchance3/rolleyes.gif

Actual instances of criminal child abuse are much more likely to occur in a home headed by homosexuals than in a home headed by heterosexuals. Studies documenting the higher rates incidents of child abuse by homosexuals, higher rates of drug and alcohol abuse among homosexuals, higher rates of domestic violence among homosexuals, et cetera, are readily available to anyone willing to do some honest research.

See, for example, “Homosexual Parents,” Adolescence 31 (1996), P. Cameron and K. Cameron, authors. An excerpt:

“A disproportionate percentage - 29 percent - of adult children of homosexual parents had been specifically subjected to sexual molestation by that homosexual parent, compared to only 0.6 percent of adult children of heterosexual parents having reported sexual relations with their parent… Having a homosexual parent(s) appears to increase the risk of incest with a parent by a factor of about 50.”

– Mark L. Chance.
 
I have to agree with mlchance that soulspeak23 is clairvoyant.

How do you know what my interaction with homosexuals is? My roommate in college was in the conservatory of music in which he introduced me to many homosexuals. I also called several of them my friends. Just because I quote a Catholic Answer resource does not make me ignorant of homosexual issues in the US. I will say on the whole that the homosexuals I have met are some of the most sensitive and talented individuals I know. However they are as a group the most miserable people I’ve met. From my observation it is not because people will not accept them. It is because they cannot accept themselves (that whole natural law thing).

My pastor was the chaplain of the Courage chapter in our diocese. We have discussed several times his and my observations on homosexuals. He thought it was interesting that he observed that many times when a homosexual became a friend with another homosexual they would stop having sex together. That alone is an interesting observation.

The scientific data is overwhelming that children do better in a husband and wife centered household. What I have a problem with is that homosexual activists try to portray one example of a child doing alright in a homosexual household and try to pass that off as normal. It is the same type of argument that we need to keep abortion legal because of rape and incest even though they count for less than .9 % of all abortions.

I agree that we need to stop using the extremes as arguing points. But if there existed a product that reduced people’s lifespan by almost 50% there would be an outcry (and rightly so) from the public to ban this product. Why when the statistics show that a gay lifestyle reduces a homosexual’s lifespan to 38 years old, there is no such outcry?
 
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