Here’s my take on this story:
First of all, it’s none of my business what the Pope said to that woman. It could only become my business if it had some impact on Church teaching, which it doesn’t.
That said, and all media misreporting aside, what are we to make of this now that we know about it?
I don’t think these people are liars. I have no reason to think that of them. Moreover, I don’t believe Pope Francis actually gave them this advice. So, what do I think is most likely? I believe it’s simply a matter of miscommunication.
I know in my own experience people don’t always hear what’s actually being said, but rather hear mainly what they want to hear.
If Church teaching is to be any guide, I believe Pope Francis’ actual advice would have been something like this:
The Church teachings on this are clear, your husband is still married to the other woman before God. You are not his wife, and the children you have had with him have been had out of wedlock. As a daughter of the Church, you must acknowledge and accept this. However, I can see that you have built a life with this man, and as such you have certain parental obligations, particularly providing a stable and loving environment for your children. Therefore, it may be considered unreasonable and even detrimental to break down this life you have built and cause further pain and suffering. Therefore, if you are repentant of your sins, and you confess your sins to a priest, and you make a firm commitment to live chastely with this man, as brother and sister, then it is possible for you to receive communion. However, should you have intercourse with this man in the future, you will have to confess your sin before receiving again. Moreover, given that there are those in your parish who know your situation, we do not want to cause scandal to them. This is your affair, but there is a public element to it, and if you do receive communion, they would still be under the impression that you are living with this man as husband and wife, and this may scandalize them into believing Church law has changed in this matter, when it has not. Therefore, in order to prevent scandal, it would be better for you to go to another parish wherein nobody knows your situation. Be of good heart, my daughter, the Lord is merciful. Be obedient to the Church, and He will give Himself to you.