Young Vocations vs Life Experience

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Aragon

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Having a conversation with my mother tonight, she posed two very legitimate and heartfelt questions on furthering discernment to enter seminary. The questions went along the lines of “You are young, do they not wish you to have more life experience to be able to counsel others?” “You come from a small college, and are finally on your own, do you not think you need to understand life more before going to seminary?”

What are your thoughts? Is it a greater benefit to wait and learn more about life before entering?
 
In my diocese’s seminary, there’s a healthy number of traditional aged (18-22) undergraduates who are expected (assuming they don’t leave) to move on to the graduate seminary. It’s ideal to have younger candidates as they’ll generally be able to give the Church more years of their life, and part of the social aspect of seminary is to help give them the experience they’ll need to pastor effectively. This isn’t something that comes strictly from age.
 
Couldn’t maybe similar questions be asked in regards to a couple marrying?

I’d recommend speaking to a couple of Catholic vocation directors and some priests.

Catholics can correct me if I said anything wrong hopefully it was good advice.🤔☺️
 
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Personal question and you don’t have to answer it… Is your mom not wanting you to become a priest because she wants grandchildren?
 
If God interiorly calls you to this vocation, it should feel like a supernatural desire to serve God and help souls. That is the most important. Life experience is optional in my opinion.
 
Guest1 said:
Couldn’t maybe similar questions be asked in regards to a couple marrying?

I’d recommend speaking to a couple of Catholic vocation directors and some priests.

Catholics can correct me if I said anything wrong hopefully it was good advice.🙂🙂
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Dan_Defender said:
If God interiorly calls you to this vocation, it should feel like a supernatural desire to serve God and help souls. That is the most important. Life experience is optional in my opinion.
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These are both right on. So many people seem to think that a person needs experience in “the real world” before they begin vocation discernment. As if they need to try something “normal” before deciding to become a priest.

I’ve gotten this response from people before, and it’s always rubbed me the wrong way. The perspective people seem to have is that you need to live life; and if you finally get too desperate trying to find a spouse, career, etc, then maybe seminary could be a last ditch option.

OP: I’m not trying to put words into your mom’s mouth or analyze how she’s thinking, but this is how I tend to see things in my own experience with these types of situations.
 
I can think of two great examples of priests who went into high school seminary: Fr. Mitch Pacwa and Fr. Andrew Apostoli (God rest his soul).

Talk to a vocations director. He will help you with your discernment.
 
@Aragon

St John was only 19-20 years when he followed Jesus. You’ll get your life experiences in the seminary and from your activities in the parish level ,and further ministries .God Bless
 
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So there are a few points I would like to make:
  1. I am currently applying for seminary and will be meeting with a psychologist mid-March.
  2. My mother wants me to give her grandchildren. I am not being boastful, but there are many women I could pursue.
  3. I have had a few girlfriends and helped babysit with them, and even though I am great with children, my mother is afraid I will become a pedofile.
In a sense, I think my parents are afraid for my future down the road. It is a loving concern and I am grateful, but the thought of experiencing real life is something I wanted to take into consideration.
 
You are not going to get a consensus on this question. For me, I think entering young is helpful. Most people are not yet fully formed, so the formation can be more beneficial to them than to someone older. You need to pursue what you’re being attracted to and follow the lead of the vocation director. Some places encourage young vocations and some will not take them.
 
I was slated to enter a monastery, but educational debts and “you need to pay your own bills for a while” got in the way. I also racked up considerable credit card debt. Then bought a car from my college buddy, which brought on more expenses.

Do I regret it? Not in the least. My first apartment was chilly, but the second one was like my own little Mount Carmel – and warmer.

The largest parish in the country is here in this diocese. The former pastor begged and pleaded with the bishop to put a particular priest in as pastor because he had previous BUSINESS experience. Parishes are non-profits, so getting involved with one might be helpful.

Blessings,
Mrs Cloisters OP
Lay Dominican
http://cloisters.tripod.com/
http://cloisters.tripod.com/charity/
http://cloisters.tripod.com/holyangels/id9.html/
 
My thoughts…you should ask yourself why do you want to become a priest? After that, study all the options. This includes being a diocesan priest, joining orders or being a Deacon. Some orders, like the Jesuits, regularly take older well educated men with some life experience. They regularly take men in their late 30s and early 40s. St. Ignatius was not ordained a priest until his late forties…back in his day he would have been a pretty old man. Deacons are usually older married men too.
 
Aragon said:
  • My mother wants me to give her grandchildren. I am not being boastful, but there are many women I could pursue.
  • I have had a few girlfriends and helped babysit with them, and even though I am great with children, my mother is afraid I will become a pedofile.
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First, I think it is absurd to think that being a single man predisposes you to pedophilia or sexually harassing those around you.

I’m glad CAF doesn’t have a “dislike button” with what I’m about to say. With that being said… Fr Longenecker opinion article is worth reading based on your questions. I started a thread a few months back about it. He is a married Catholic priest (a convert) who expressed significant concerns about celibacy. He felt it could be isolating, and this could cause troubles or attract the wrong people into the priesthood.
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Great article by a married Catholic Priest Vocations
I thought this was a great article by Fr. Dwight Longenecker…a married catholic priests. What do people think… Some insightful quotes from the article… He is not proposing that we “Allow all priests to get married tomorrow”, but he is proposing a different model. Often the arguments on this forum assume somebody is pushing to allow all priests go get married as soon as possible. Really…nobody with any serious or sincere understanding of Catholicism is proposing this.
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I do greatly appreciate each of your concerns about my mother’s thoughts. However, my mother does that out of love for me. She did not grow up in The Church, and much of her family strictly denies much of what we believe. She knows me as a person, but is very protective and afraid. These thoughts she has are not meant to produce ill will towards me and my decisions, they are just her fear for her son being attacked by those in our family and those in the community. I do not find what she is saying to be disturbing, as I respect her thoughts and appreciate her openness.

As far as celibacy, for a long time I felt that God was calling me to marriage. I thought it was becoming a reality with the last girl I dated, but we ended up parting ways. I know I can live in God’s Love and trust in Him and His Blessed Mother to always be with me.

Fr. Longenecker is actually from my home diocese, he is a wonderful man and has a beautiful new church. Thank you for this article, but I firmly stand by The Church’s sacred tradition about priestly celibacy.
 
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