10 year old asking tough questions

[josh987654321]

This afternoon my 10 year old son mentioned to me that many of his friends are Baptist. He said, “they believe basically the same things we do, right?” I told him that they are Christians but they don’t have full revelation of Jesus because they don’t have the sacraments. I told him that don’t believe the same things we do about Mary (perpetual virginity, immaculate conception), don’t believe in reconciliation and they do honor civil marriages. He’s a smart kid and understood those things.

However, when I told him that they do not believe that the Eucharist really does become the body and blood, he said “Well, that makes sense. I mean it is just a cracker that was made in a factory and a guy just raises it up. There is nothing special about that.” I explained to him that Jesus was even questioned about it and reassured us that it IS the literal body and blood, but he just kind of shrugged it off.

Has anyone had a similar experience with their preteens/teens, and if so how did you handle it? As I mentioned, he is a smart kid and has years of faith formation. I was his teacher for many of those years and I know he as a much better understanding than the other kids in the classes seemed to. I’m kind of at a loss. I don’t want to tell him to believe because I said so, and I want his faith to be his own. What has worked for you all, and are there any good resources I could point him to?

Have you tried explaing to him about “substance” and “accidents” of the eucharist? If he does/doesn’t doubt that there is a change of substance, I strongly recommend showing him these - catholicdoors.com/misc/eucharisticmiracles.htm

This link provides many Eucharistic miracles in which the “accidents” of the Eucharist have also changed into literal flesh and blood, this helps reinforce us that there is a true change of “substance” when the host is concecrated.

This is my favourite “Pope St. Gregory the Great” therealpresence.org/eucharst/mir/english_pdf/Rome1.pdf

At the moment
of receiving Holy Communion,
a Roman noblewoman began
to laugh because she had
doubts about the Real Presence
of Christ in the consecrated
Bread and Wine. The Pope,
troubled by her disbelief,
decided not to give her
Communion and then the
Bread turned into Flesh
and Blood.

I hope this helps you and your son.

God Bless.

Thank you for reading
Josh

 

[VeritasLuxMea]

Is it just strange to put one child in Catholic school and leave the other one in public school though? I can’t understand the rationale that was given. Maybe it’s that they don’t want to change the older son out of schools he’s been in all this time. That would make more sense. Or maybe they think that a girl is in more danger in public schools. I just can’t understand why the younger child gets to have the Catholic education but the older one is out of luck.

Edit: I see the OP mentioned gifted and talented education. I guess that’s the rationale - but what if the son is influenced away from the Church? Was it worth that risk? I think G&T classes are over-rated. That’s JMO. Anyway that’s a side discussion. I’d be concerned if my son were surrounded by Baptists and had no support for his faith.

I see that you’ve grown so accustomed to my snarkiness that it no longer phases you.

Yeah, 1 and not the other is unusual for sure… she gave hear reasons, but still…

 

[TheRealJuliane]

VeritasLuxMea;10778274**:

I see that you’ve grown so accustomed to my snarkiness that it no longer phases you.

Yeah, 1 and not the other is unusual for sure… she gave her reasons, but still…



This happens to me a lot IRL. I miss people’s hidden meanings because I am a “say what you mean, mean what you say” type of person. When Proverbs mentions “the simple,” that’s me.

I used to get my feelings hurt on the internet, but then I got over it.

 

[VanSensei]

To be fair, 16k/year is a lot for one family to do. That’s a public college in some states.

RE: The Baptists, honestly, I think they’ll strengthen his faith in Christ as a whole. You, as a parent have to add the Catholic side and help him see the big picture. The best Catholic education comes from the parents.

 

[mcrts]

I honestly think it’s great that he’s questioning and engaging you in religion and faith. At least you’ll be able to clear up any doubts he may have. Kids nowadays have to grow up with the constant barrage of the mainstream media bashing the church. If he gets his questions answered from a trusted adult, he would not go looking for it through other less reliable sources.

I agree with the poster who suggested looking up the Miracle of Lanciano. There are many Eucharistic miracles out there and our Holy Father himself was witness to one of them. It’s intriguing and is one of the mysteries that baffles scientists to this day.

 

[Abundant]

To be fair, 16k/year is a lot for one family to do. That’s a public college in some states.

RE: The Baptists, honestly, I think they’ll strengthen his faith in Christ as a whole. You, as a parent have to add the Catholic side and help him see the big picture. The best Catholic education comes from the parents.

Thanks for your support here. The main reason that he is not in Catholic school is financial. I mentioned that my daughters tuition is $8k per year. That does not include school lunches (packed or purchased, field trips, activities, uniforms, etc.) Nor does it include both before and after care which we pay $250 additional per month for. Being that he was already in a highly rated public school with friends and good grades, it made sense to leave him where he was and BEGIN my daughter (who is just 4 years old now) in Catholic school. There is a discount for the second child of $500/year not including the other things that I mentioned. It is not favoritism at all. It is just what made sense for our family and our finances. Honestly, the thousands that we are paying per year for my daughter is a HUGE burden on our family. There have been months where we were using credit for gasoline because we knew tution was due. Most of the families live in very expensive houses and live a very privledged lifestyle as can be seen by all of the Mercedes lined up to pick up their kids. That being said…any of you who want to pay to put both of my kids in Catholic schools, just let me know and I’ll be glad to send you the bill

I was just looking for resources or ‘talking points’ if you will about the Eucharist conversation so that I, as a parent and primary educator of my children, can provide him with the tools that he needs as he grows in his faith. The private vs Catholic education is better saved for another board, another time (IMHO).

Thanks to all who answered and who understood that.

 

[heidi_storage]

Now that this child is asking questions, it may not be the best response to try to shelter him from outside influence by putting him into Catholic school at this point. (It may cause resentment to uproot him.) I agree with other posters–answer his questions honestly and lovingly, set him good examples, and give him good boundaries–and pray and trust to God.

 

[bcuster]

10 year olds! They’re trying to figure out the world–still in the black-white thinking stage and not very good at understanding theological truths. How do you explain mystical truths to them? Tell them the story. Give them the big picture. I like to start at the beginning. Creation-what kind of Being can create the world we see around us. God creates out of love. Then Adam and Eve and how evil entered the world. Then God’s constant reaching out to people throughout history setting things up for God’s plan: The incarnation of Jesus. He becomes one of us. Jesus lives among us, heals, teaches, and them pays our debt. But how is Jesus going to remain with us? What plan does God have to be with all his people throughout time? Jesus wants to remain physically present in the world with us. Passover. Last Supper. Commissioning of the apostles as priests. Eucharist. This is the true story of God’s love.

 

[EasterJoy]

Is it just strange to put one child in Catholic school and leave the other one in public school though? I can’t understand the rationale that was given. Maybe it’s that they don’t want to change the older son out of schools he’s been in all this time. That would make more sense. Or maybe they think that a girl is in more danger in public schools. I just can’t understand why the younger child gets to have the Catholic education but the older one is out of luck…

They did not have the money to start him in the Catholic school, it is stressful for a child to change schools, and the public school also has programs especially tailored to talented students. If he loses those programs, the change to the parish school could very easily be something he resents, a resentment he transfers to the Church. Very often parents who have their children in the public school volunteer to teach CCD at their parish, and they see to it that their child at least gets the facts of the faith taught in a Catholic setting with other Catholic students.

Another reason I know of Catholic parents to have one student in a Catholic school and another not is that one student is in a class with a child who is a bully but that the school will do nothing about. The parents don’t have any way to protect their child except to put him in a different school. If the sibling is happy in her class, though, they may elect to leave her there. So there are many reasons the parish school might not work out for one child, and yet will work out for another.