12-Step Catholics, please help

[monicatholic]

Hi SpiritMeadow,

I think, in practice, BlessedToo has advised a beginning approach similar to yours, to which I’ll adhere.

I think though, the guiding principals of both yours and Blessed’s advice, may be different.

I have a responsibility to practice the spiritual works of mercy; ‘admonish the sinner’ and ‘instruct the ignorant.’ but i’ve also been given, as one of the fruits of the HolySpirit, patience. and I am to practice the virtue of prudence. then there’s doing all this in humility. and the greatest of these is love.

tall order, yeah. Blessed be God for the graces of the Sacraments, for the Rosary, for the gift of Good Counsel.

 

[cascherman]

cascherman and all,

i do thank you for your concern, advice and prayers. i’m amazed to report this:

after re-reading all your generous posts and praying throughout the day, i called her tonight to invite her to an AA meeting tomorrow. said woman informed me she’s been drinking for a couple of days. i said, “OK. if and whenever you want to try this sobriety thing again, you can call me.”

later, she called me and said, "I have one question. why didn’t you quit me tonight?

I said, “i’ve been praying about you. God loves you. I have a responsibility to that.”

she said, “God hates queers.”

i said, “God hates sin. He loves you.”

she said, “I want to know your God.”

it would be unfair for me to make a regular report, but I ask you for so many continued prayers for both her and for me. please pray that I humbly do God’s will. please pray that she is changed, healed, reborn through HIS grace.

tonight i’m just sitting here astonished by God’s love and mercy.
Praise be to God.
Praised be HIS Holy Name.

Wow, that is amazing.
Great news!

 

[LauraSings]

Can a faithful Catholic act as a sponsor*** **to someone in a 12 step program who lives an objectively sinful lifestyle (cohabitation, active homosexual, etc.)???

*****sponsorship is practiced with intention of helping them achieve sobriety or any other addiction release.

Not right away. If the sponsored person actually sticks with the program, then probably during the more intense Fourth Step work you would find an appropriate opportunity to broach the subject: “How does your situation reflect your ‘old tapes,’ ‘stinkin’ thinkin’?” and go from there - introducing the idea that our fundamental life choices are a huge empowerment and that a change in lifestyle can actually help recovery.

Good luck! Most people don’t get that far -

(from a former member of AlAnon)

 

[LauraSings]

Not right away. If the sponsored person actually sticks with the program, then probably during the more intense Fourth Step work you would find an appropriate opportunity to broach the subject: “How does your situation reflect your ‘old tapes,’ ‘stinkin’ thinkin’?” and go from there - introducing the idea that our fundamental life choices are a huge empowerment and that a change in lifestyle can actually help recovery.

Good luck! Most people don’t get that far -

(from a former member of AlAnon)

AARGH!!! I HATE it when I do that! Soooo sorry!

I don’t think there is a conflict with your 12-step sponsorship; however, since you’re in a ‘secular’ program you won’t be able to immediately address the lifestyle issue, particularly not as a sin issue - and you might not ever be able to do that; however, your own Faith will be a palpable source of wisdom, insight and strength to the person you are sponsoring.

(Now insert my original post for Fourth Step, etc. )

 

[SpiritMeadow]

Monica,

I do understand. I’d never seen the emphasis placed on “admonishing the sinner” as I do here. As I said, there has always been a sense of pride that we don’t do thinks like JW’s and other ultra-right evangelicals. And as i said, I think its apparent that such admonition is mostly unneeded and unasked for so I question whose psyche we are helping. But having said all that, I wish you the best with your work. I’m sure as time goes on you will grow in the ability to properly discern when to speak and when to empathize quietly.