12 year old Jesus at the temple

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Pai_Nosso

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We know this story from Luke 2: 41-52.

I don’t understand how Joseph and Mary could have left Jerusalem and forgotten to bring their son. If this happened today the government would most likely find the parents to be irresponsible and take the boy to be raised by foster parents.

Not only did they leave their son behind but they traveled for a whole day before even realizing he was missing. How is that even possible?

I remember loosing my parents at the market when I was a boy. It didn’t take long for my worried parents to find me. It took them 3 days to find Jesus.

So what am i missing here? How could they forget to bring their son? And how could they possibly have gone for a whole day before even realizing he was missing?
 
Pai_Nosso said:
I don’t understand how Joseph and Mary could have left Jerusalem and forgotten to bring their son.
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Pai_Nosso said:
Not only did they leave their son behind but they traveled for a whole day before even realizing he was missing. How is that even possible?
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They were traveling with family, in a large caravan. It wasn’t the 21st century. They didn’t have cell phones. They traveled in extended family groups.
Pai_Nosso said:
I remember loosing my parents at the market when I was a boy. It didn’t take long for my worried parents to find me.
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I’m guessing that there weren’t hundreds of relatives traveling together to the market, right?
 
Pai_Nosso said:
So what am i missing here?
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For starters:

That the culture and standards of that time and place are vastly different than the culture and standards of here and now.

That a 12 year old male in that time and place was much more experienced and ready for independence than a modern 12 year old boy.

That people then did not hover over their children and wrap them in padding to keep reality from coming close.
 
MasterHaster said:
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Gorgias:
They were traveling with family, in a large caravan. It wasn’t the 21st century. They didn’t have cell phones. They traveled in extended family groups.
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But was he not their only son? I they had a dozen children your theory may be credible.
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I guess we won’t know the complete story on this one in this life. Our standards today (specially for a 12 year old) is very different than 2000 years ago. They traveled in caravans, with friends, relatives, others travelling together. Did Joseph and Mary ask a friend to watch over Jesus while going to Jerusalem? Was jesus travelling with a cousin or a friend in the caravan… We don’t know all the info. All we know is at one point on their way back, Joseph and Mary realized (at their horror and dismay) that Jesus was not in the caravan… So they headed back to Jerusalem to find him.
 
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Pai_Nosso said:
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So what am i missing here? How could they forget to bring their son? And how could they possibly have gone for a whole day before even realizing he was missing?
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They traveled in a group.

Luke 2
44 And thinking that he was in the company, they came a day’s journey, and sought him among their kinsfolks and acquaintance.
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After three days they found Jesus. Three days after the crucifixion Jesus reappeared.
 
Vico said:
They traveled in a group.
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MasterHaster said:
But was he not their only son? I they had a dozen children your theory may be credible.
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Even more reason to check that your only child is there
When you become a parent your life becomes secondary. Everything you do is for the benefit of your child. Their health and safety is always your number one priority.
steph03 said:
I guess we won’t know the complete story on this one in this life. Our standards today (specially for a 12 year old) is very different than 2000 years ago. They traveled in caravans, with friends, relatives, others travelling together. Did Joseph and Mary ask a friend to watch over Jesus while going to Jerusalem? Was jesus travelling with a cousin or a friend in the caravan… We don’t know all the info. All we know is at one point on their way back, Joseph and Mary realized (at their horror and dismay) that Jesus was not in the caravan… So they headed back to Jerusalem to find him.
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I like this response. I think sometimes we try to explain everything and take on theories that aren’t very good when really “we don’t know”. We aren’t supposed to know everything.
 
The women and men walked separately, and the children could walk with whoever they chose. You could get pretty far before you discovered what happened.

We also don’t know when Jesus became seperated from the rest of the crowd.
 
In some parts of the world, children were sometimes handed off to the care of other members in the extended family. Parents weren’t the only authority figure in a child’s life. Parents were the main authority figure but not the only ones. I as a child would sometimes live with aunts, uncles, grandparents for months without seeing either of my parents.

It’s hard people who grew up in nuclear families, like those in the West, the function of extended families.

Mary or Joseph probably assumed that Jesus was with other relatives. He probably went on extended trips with the rest of the family before and traveled mainly with cousins his age. To his parents it was probably nothing new if they didn’t see him for a while.
 
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When he was five years old, our son was lost while hiking with his father in the Adirondack mountains. How could that possibly happen in such a small group? As it turned out, his father thought he was with a couple of other hikers who had gotten ahead of the group. He wasn’t.

It isn’t hard for me to see how Jesus could have gotten lost, and that his family believed him to be in the company of other relatives.
 
There are aspects of the story that remain a mystery to us, as they evidently also did to Mary and Joseph who were “astonished” to find Jesus at the temple speaking with the elders, and Mary pondered the incident over and over in her heart. Besides preparing Mary for the 3 days between the Crucifixion and Resurrection, the scene also tells us that, contrary to some theologians, Jesus clearly knew his identity and mission at the age of 12.
 
Imagine your house full of people for a birthday party. It might take you some time before you realize one of the kids opened the front door and the dog’s been gone a while.
 
Travelling in a group was the safest way to travel. Likely the women walked chatting together and so did the men, the children with either. A 12 yr old boy would know to stick with the group. Why would it even occur to them that he wouldn’t stay with the group? If you can’t trust Jesus, who can you trust? I would imagine when it came time for supper, his absence would be apparent! lol
 
All of this!

Also, a 12 year old male in 1st Century Palestine was not considered a child, they were given autonomy and responsibility. Jesus at 12 was not like modern 6th graders.

It would also have been seen as a greatly sad thing to live with just mom, dad and son. People lived in quite extended families. The women and the young children traveled together, the men and boys over 12 traveled together. A 12 year old would have been with a large group of his cousins and uncles.
 
Luke 2: 41 - 52 (with explanation):

And his parents went every year to Jerusalem, at the solemn day of the pasch, [42] And when he was twelve years old, they going up into Jerusalem, according to the custom of the feast,

V. 42 says that the Child Jesus went with them - they did not forget Him.

[43] And having fulfilled the days, when they returned, the child Jesus remained in Jerusalem; and his parents knew it not.

He remained in Jerusalem - they did not leave Him behind.

[44] And thinking that he was in the company, they came a day’s journey, and sought him among their kinsfolks and acquaintance.

He could travel with Our Lady in the women’s caravan or with St. Joseph in the men’s caravan. Both caravans would meet at the end of the day and that’s when Our Lady & St. Joseph realized that He was missing.

[45] And not finding him, they returned into Jerusalem, seeking him.

St. Alphonsus says that since St. Joseph would not live to see the Passion and Death of Our Lord, the loss of the Child Jesus and His Finding in the Temple was part of his share in the Redemption.

[46] And it came to pass, that, after three days, they found him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the doctors, hearing them, and asking them questions. [47] And all that heard him were astonished at his wisdom and his answers. [48] And seeing him, they wondered. And his mother said to him: Son, why hast thou done so to us? behold thy father and I have sought thee sorrowing. [49] And he said to them: How is it that you sought me? did you not know, that I must be about my father’s business? [50] And they understood not the word that he spoke unto them.

[51] And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject to them. And his mother kept all these words in her heart. [52] And Jesus advanced in wisdom, and age, and grace with God and men.

He willingly subjected Himself to His Ever-Virgin Mother and His foster-father St. Joseph in order to expiate our sins of pride.

In his book The Glories of Mary, St. Alphonsus Maria de Liguori explains it MUCH better than I. I’m paraphrasing St. Alphonsus here.

Apologies to St. Joseph and St. Alphonsus if I posted anything incorrectly!
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Limoncello4021 said:
Jesus clearly knew his identity and mission at the age of 12.
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I think 12 is a key age, where in Jewish custom he was leaving his childhood to become an adult. Jesus probably had a Bar Mitzvah. According to the Midrash, Bar Mitzvahs are very old and based on Genesis 21:8: ‘And the child [Isaac] grew and was weaned, and Abraham made a great feast on the day that Isaac was weaned.’ The Midrash states that this weaning brought Isaac into manhood at the age of 13.
 
3 days makes sense. They travelled one day before discovering he was missing (which is explained in the Gospels). They then travel back to Jerusalem one day. Then they spent the third day looking for him.

How would you have expected them to find him sooner?
 
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