14 year old son wants to be a girl

[SMGS127]

Question for those who know (or think they know):

Suppose that a specialist tries to treat this boy, and the boy comes out still wanting to be a girl. Is that supposed to be evidence that he is genuinely transgender?

I ask because it’s obvious to me that we sometimes, through abuse, acquire dispositions and desires that are essentially irremovable, except by the action of God. But the fact that we cannot remove them does not mean that they are right or good. (If an abuser abused me with S&M as a child, I might always be interested in S&M, even despite good therapy. But that does not mean that it is good and right for me to pursue sadomasochism.)

Is my thinking off here? In what way?

This is an extraordinarily tricky issue. The only way that transgenderism could be legitimate in the Church would be if transgender kids had biological errors in-utero, post-conception, that led to the misconfiguration of genitalia and reproductive organs (which later snowballs into hormones, skeletal structure, and all sorts of further errors).

So, keeping that in mind, let’s say a child (not the OP’s child, because I don’t want to be suggesting medical advice) is abused as a child. This child is STILL male or female, has always been that gender, and will always be that gender. Nothing, least not external abuse, can change someone’s gender. So if a child is transgender, they NEED hormonal treatment. If a child is not, hormonal treatment is very bad for them. However, how do we work through issues of abuse to determine if the child is truly transgender or conditioned through abuse? Well, I don’t have an answer, but that’s something that I would assume pediatric gender therapists work with all the time. Either way though, the transgender child should not lose access to treatment because someone else abuses them. Would that not be abuse upon abuse, akin to suggesting a diabetic could not access medication to reduce their blood sugar if they had been abused as a child?

Either way, I totally understand your bewilderment at how that scenario would be handled, but I have faith in gender therapists, most of whom require all sorts of psychological and medical sifting and sorting to even broach the idea of hormonal treatment, let alone anything more permanent.

However, keep in mind my entire post is predicated on what would happen if transgenderism is licit in the Church, which is not known at the moment. Treatment is allowable for now if it is the only way to treat a transgender person’s distress, but the surgery cannot be seen as changing someone’s sex (which should be obvious to everyone on both sides of the issue) and transgender people [whether seeking treatment or not, I believe] are currently barred from entering into marriage and Holy Orders under Church discipline. It is a very thorny issue at the moment, and ultimately, I think we, as a Church, need to be very patient until we finally get an answer from the Vatican.

 

[Rin]

[whether seeking treatment or not, I believe]

This seems correct I think, given that the document in question states that marriages can be annulled (upon transition of one of the parts) if the condition can be proven to predate marriage.

Whether or not one agrees that transgenderism is congenital, it would definitely apply to someone who know they are transgender, but choose to not transition and seek to marry. If a priest knows about the issue, I doubt they’d the let the person marry.

 

[Zelie_Louis]

Some issues are beyond the scope of CAF. Since you are already seeking help from medical professionals, please take your morality questions to a spiritual director, parish priest or you may call the apologetics department at CA.

CA
Main Switchboard
619-387-7200
Monday–Friday, 9 AM–4:45 PM, Pacific