1st Comm. Family nonCath or nonPracticing

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pecoemla

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This situation bothers me and I don’t know how to respond. I will try to be brief.
A local private, non-diocesan, Catholic school has some children whose parents do not attend Mass or in some cases don’t even consider themselves to be Catholic and attend other churches. Their children are in the class that is also preparing for 1st Communion. They wanted to receive 1st Communion with their classmates. Apparently, the parish has no problem with this. The only time they go to Mass is with the other school children once a week on Fridays.
  1. How to respond to the following rationale?
If the Church says the age of reason is 7 and this is the age of these children.
And, these children have studied about the Eucharist.
And, they believe what the Church teaches.
And, even if they only go to Mass on Fridays, they at least have a foundation for the future.
It’s a lot easier to “come back to the Church” after they have had 1st Communion.
When they are old enough to get to Msss on their own, I think they will.
They see themselves as Catholics now.
How can it be wrong to let them receive 1st Communion?
  1. Supposedly one of them was taken to a protestant church a few weeks before the 1st Communion date for baptism so they would meet the requirement that they be baptized in order to join the others for 1st Communion. (The attitude and complicity by the local parish is another story.) What difference does that make?
It all certainly doesn’t seem kosher to me and I want to be able to accurately respond to them. I am prepared for the usual accusations that I am not charitable, hypocritical, rigid, Pharisaical, etc.
 
you shouldn’t worry about others and what they are or are not doing with bringing themselves or their children to Mass regularly. Yes, they should as a family be attending Mass together. Yes and sadly there are children in Catholic Schools and the only time they attend Mass is during the school Mass. But you have to look at this way. People who don’t go to Mass or bring their children only hurt themselves, not you or me. We need to leave evaluations of other’s, their practice and spirituality in God’s hands. Don’t focus on this, it’s not our place to determine should or shouldn’t be receiving the sacraments.
 
Do you have some sort of role in all this beside being a bystander? I would talk to the pastor.
 
robwar said:
you shouldn’t worry about others and what they are or are not doing with bringing themselves or their children to Mass regularly. Yes, they should as a family be attending Mass together. Yes and sadly there are children in Catholic Schools and the only time they attend Mass is during the school Mass. But you have to look at this way. People who don’t go to Mass or bring their children only hurt themselves, not you or me. We need to leave evaluations of other’s, their practice and spirituality in God’s hands. Don’t focus on this,** it’s not our place to determine should or shouldn’t be receiving the sacraments**.
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Unless you’re the pastor, of course. 🙂
 
It seems that there are several groups of children in the First Communion class:
  1. Catholic children of faithful Catholics
  2. Catholic children baptized in the Catholic Church of non-practicing Catholic parents
  3. Children baptized *outside *the Catholic Church of non-practicing Catholic parents
  4. Children baptized outside the Church whose parents are in no way Catholic
  5. Children who have not been baptized (ie, of Baptist or JW parents)
The problem I would have is with the last three groups. Children who have not been baptized in the Catholic Church should not receive Communion unless they have been received into the Church.

What I would do in this case is to call the diocese and ask them what the rules are. This will assure that you know what the rules are from a more authoritative source than anonymous posters on the internet 😉 *and *alert the diocese to this potential problem.

However, if I thought there was a chance the pastor did *not *know this was happening, then I would do the above with the pastor first.
 
Oops, just noticed that this is taking place in a non-diocesan school.

In which case, you may need to do the above with the priest, the principal, and the order running the school before discussing with the diocese. They still operate with the consent of the diocese, but there is a separate “chain of command,” so to speak.

Once you have notified those in authority of what is happening, put it out of your mind and let the authorities take care of it on their own. They may not take action, or they may work slowly, but leave them alone to do their thing–you will have done what you need to do.

PS: I do not believe that you are personally *obliged *to do anything about this.
 
Joe_5859 said:
Do you have some sort of role in all this beside being a bystander? I would talk to the pastor.
Click to expand...
This. Unless its directly affecting you in some way, or your children, I don’t know if there is much you can do besides talking to the priest. If you are just a bystander, I would also wonder if I have all the facts and I haven’t become a victim of gossip and rumors.
 
Pray for them and their parents that they will find their way back to the Church. I would not presume to know their situation even if I thought it appeared irregular. 👍
 
How is it that a Catholic grade school is not under the jurisdiction of the bishop?
 
pecoemla said:
  1. Supposedly one of them was taken to a protestant church a few weeks before the 1st Communion date for baptism so they would meet the requirement that they be baptized in order to join the others for 1st Communion. (The attitude and complicity by the local parish is another story.) What difference does that make?
It all certainly doesn’t seem kosher to me and I want to be able to accurately respond to them. I am prepared for the usual accusations that I am not charitable, hypocritical, rigid, Pharisaical, etc.
Click to expand...
If the above is really what happened, the kid is not even Catholic. There is no way he/she should be receiving Communion. Even at a private school, isn’t the local Pastor responsible for these kids? Are they receiving Communion at the school or at a local Church. The parish, after all, would be responsible for recording their sacraments.
 
quiet52 said:
How is it that a Catholic grade school is not under the jurisdiction of the bishop?
Click to expand...
If there is a priest of the order who acts as the priest for the school, then he is only somewhat under the jurisdiction of the bishop; he is more under the jurisdiction of the head of his order.

This all came out when Notre Dame conferred an academic honor on Obama, remember? The local ordinary (bishop) could not take action as ND is under the Congregation of the Holy Cross (CSC-- Congregation du Sacre Coeur).
 
PatriceA said:
This. Unless its directly affecting you in some way, or your children, I don’t know if there is much you can do besides talking to the priest. If you are just a bystander, I would also wonder if I have all the facts and I haven’t become a victim of gossip and rumors.
Click to expand...
Yes, this is it. Even if you went to the priest with your concerns, you will end up becoming a busybody and even thought of as a gossip. I think there will always be this sort of thin line in any sacramental prep. I had an 8th grade catechist share with me once her frustration in having kids in her class that don’t go to church and once done, weren’t actually planning on attending afterwards, in her words “the Church passes out the sacraments like candy”. I think most catechism programs and schools do try to have some kind of guidelines and requirements such as being enrolled in 1st or 7th grade before the sacramental year, not living together before marriage, attending baptism classes etc. I think all of us on this thread know those who don’t attend or practice their faith yet still want the sacraments for their children. Its easy to fall into the trap of looking at others and then try to judge the situation from a distance. This should likewise be considered is that the sacraments do impart grace to the recipients and even if on the surface we may think why are they doing this when they don’t attend etc. Maybe that seed of faith and grace can result in big fruit later on in life in spite of the lack of current commitment. Jesus healed all that came to Him. he didn’t put a litmus test before hand, he didn’t demand that they follow Him. Jesus just gave freely because of love, nothing was asked in return. One needs to pray that the sacrament will impart to that child grace to know God in spite of what the parents are doing or not doing.
 
pecoemla said:
This situation bothers me and I don’t know how to respond. I will try to be brief.
A local private, non-diocesan, Catholic school has some children whose parents do not attend Mass or in some cases don’t even consider themselves to be Catholic and attend other churches. Their children are in the class that is also preparing for 1st Communion. They wanted to receive 1st Communion with their classmates. Apparently, the parish has no problem with this. The only time they go to Mass is with the other school children once a week on Fridays.
  1. How to respond to the following rationale?
If the Church says the age of reason is 7 and this is the age of these children.
And, these children have studied about the Eucharist.
And, they believe what the Church teaches.
And, even if they only go to Mass on Fridays, they at least have a foundation for the future.
It’s a lot easier to “come back to the Church” after they have had 1st Communion.
When they are old enough to get to Msss on their own, I think they will.
They see themselves as Catholics now.
How can it be wrong to let them receive 1st Communion?
  1. Supposedly one of them was taken to a protestant church a few weeks before the 1st Communion date for baptism so they would meet the requirement that they be baptized in order to join the others for 1st Communion. (The attitude and complicity by the local parish is another story.) What difference does that make?
It all certainly doesn’t seem kosher to me and I want to be able to accurately respond to them. I am prepared for the usual accusations that I am not charitable, hypocritical, rigid, Pharisaical, etc.
Click to expand...
There is to be a profession of faith by either the parents or guardians or by the faithful, depending on the age of the one receiving, when previously baptised in a non-Catholic church or ecclesial community. Note: Grade 2 (ages 7–8).

Diocese of Hamilton, Ontario has prepared a document that illustrates this:
RECEPTION OF CHILDREN INTO FULL COMMUNION OF THE CATHOLIC CHURCH
  1. Children in grade 2 who have been validly baptized in another Christian denomination and who wish to receive their First Communion may be received into the full communion of the Catholic Church, having presented the baptismal certificate, through a profession of faith made by their parents or guardians. See Appendix 2. For these children, the sacrament of Confirmation is celebrated at a later date (i.e. in grade 7).
  2. Children of catechetical age (that is, children who have completed grade 2 or are older) who have been validly baptized in another Christian denomination and who wish to be received into the full communion of the Catholic Church are to participate in a program similar to the program provided by the parish for children of catechetical age preparing for full initiation. With the permission and support of their parents, following suitable catechetical formation, the children make a profession of faith and celebrate Confirmation and First Eucharist at the same celebration.
bgcdsb.org/UserFiles/Servers/Server_5912063/File/About%20Us/What%20makes%20us%20different/331-SACRAMENTAL%20GUIDELINES%20-%20Complete%20Electronic%20Version.pdf
 
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