(2nd request) Why was I denied Holy Communion by an E.M.?

[Scoochy]

I’m on disability and homebound. Therefore, I rarely get to attend Holy Mass.
I’ve had many stressors since March, 2010, which cause me to feel more anxiety than usual.
Wednesday, 20OCT2010, the EM (Eucharistic Minister) sent to me a text message which said that she was going to bring with her a stranger; a new person in this Church who I don’t know. I told her that my anxiety was bad to the point of having an anxiety attack from the thought of meeting someone new. Her response: “…maybe we need 2 wait till next week so u can think about it.”
At this time I’m in need of God’s Saving Grace more than usual; how can this EM deny me the receipt of Jesus Christ?
Thank you.

Scoochy

P.S.: I posted this as a “New Thread” earlier today, but never have received a response from you yet.

 

[baltobetsy]

It’s not up to the EM to manage your anxiety and try to get you over it. It is her job to bring you the Eucharist. Period.

Call the parish and speak to the priest. He will make sure someone sets her straight and that you receive Communion.

Betsy

 

[HCC]

It’s not up to the EM to manage your anxiety and try to get you over it. It is her job to bring you the Eucharist. Period.

Call the parish and speak to the priest. He will make sure someone sets her straight and that you receive Communion.

Betsy

Absolutely!

 

[Spirithound]

It’s not up to the EM to manage your anxiety and try to get you over it. It is her job to bring you the Eucharist. Period.

Call the parish and speak to the priest. He will make sure someone sets her straight and that you receive Communion.

Betsy

I agree. Administering Holy Communion is a one-person job. This extraordinary minister has no business trying to bully you into allowing a stranger into your home.

 

[Monica4316]

I agree with the above posts

I’m sorry this happened to you

:hug1: God bless!

 

[Aydan]

I also have a disability. Sometimes people mean well and they think they are “helping” us when in fact they are not. I agree you should speak with your priest as soon as possible. I also hope that this lady will gain a better understanding of how to interact with people with disabilities in the future.

 

[SunnaB16]

I also have a disability. Sometimes people mean well and they think they are “helping” us when in fact they are not. I agree you should speak with your priest as soon as possible. I also hope that this lady will gain a better understanding of how to interact with people with disabilities in the future.

Same here.
i suffer from anxiety and VICIOUS depression.

The problem is: only those of us who suffer from something like this have even “the foggiest idea” of what it`s like.
“Pull yourself together!” Like Hell!!!

When the affliction`s not visibly obvious, outsiders are even less able to understand.

Scoochy:
You have my empathy.
Hope you can kick around on these forums, and find some fraternity and peace.

 

[Petergee]

It’s highly likely that this is a misunderstanding between you and the EMHC. That’s what happens whyen you rely on text messages. It’s not clear who this second person is, why he is coming with her, or whether she meant that she will not bring you communion this week, or if so, what the reason is. Maybe she is just showing a new EMHC around to train him. Phone her and speak to her and I’m sure you will sort out the problem and probably discover that there is no problem at all.

 

[ConstantineTG]

Do we even know why the EMHC is bringing the other person? Perhaps the EMHC wants to introduce an alternate, he/she cannot be available every week and perhaps there will be times the alternate needs to be there and its good that they come with the regular EMHC rather than show up one day all alone an un-introduced.

 

[laszlo]

You have to report this case to the pastor of the parish. I believe that laywomen should be severely disciplined, if she acted on her own.

I’m on disability and homebound. Therefore, I rarely get to attend Holy Mass.
I’ve had many stressors since March, 2010, which cause me to feel more anxiety than usual.
Wednesday, 20OCT2010, the EM (Eucharistic Minister) sent to me a text message which said that she was going to bring with her a stranger; a new person in this Church who I don’t know. I told her that my anxiety was bad to the point of having an anxiety attack from the thought of meeting someone new. Her response: “…maybe we need 2 wait till next week so u can think about it.”
At this time I’m in need of God’s Saving Grace more than usual; how can this EM deny me the receipt of Jesus Christ?
Thank you.

Scoochy

P.S.: I posted this as a “New Thread” earlier today, but never have received a response from you yet.

 

[Petergee]

You have to report this case to the pastor of the parish. I believe that laywomen should be severely disciplined, if she acted on her own.

I think you and others are rashly judging this woman.

I think it more likely that by “maybe we need 2 wait till next week so u can think about it.”, she meant that she will hold off bringing the new person around for a week out of consideration for Scoochy’s feelings. **NOT **that she would refuse to bring him Communion this week! Come on, do you really think it’s likely that any EMHC would say or do that?

 

[Joannm]

Do we even know why the EMHC is bringing the other person? Perhaps the EMHC wants to introduce an alternate, he/she cannot be available every week and perhaps there will be times the alternate needs to be there and its good that they come with the regular EMHC rather than show up one day all alone an un-introduced.

I agree. Perhaps she is thinking of retiring from this ministry and is brining along the person who will take her place. Or maybe she is going on vacation and wants someone to keep bringing you communion and wants you to get comfortable with the person while she is still here. Perhaps, and I have heard that some parishes do this, they don’t want people going alone to someone’s home, to protect both the homebound person and the EMHC. I would call the EMHC and find out why she is bringing another person. The OP might have misunderstood the text message (that is one reason why I don’t text)

 

[malphono]

I agree. Perhaps she is thinking of retiring from this ministry and is brining along the person who will take her place. Or maybe she is going on vacation and wants someone to keep bringing you communion and wants you to get comfortable with the person while she is still here. Perhaps, and I have heard that some parishes do this, they don’t want people going alone to someone’s home, to protect both the homebound person and the EMHC. I would call the EMHC and find out why she is bringing another person. The OP might have misunderstood the text message (that is one reason why I don’t text)

Yes, it’s distinctly possible that the person was bringing the alternate to introduce him/her to the OP. I think a call to the pastor would be in order to see what’s what. I’m sure the situation can be resolved easily.

 

[Sir_Knight]

You have to report this case to the pastor of the parish. I believe that laywomen should be severely disciplined, if she acted on her own.

You do realize that laywoman is an unpaid volunteer freely giving of her time and money (gas, wear & tear on the car, etc.). Before calling for severe discipline, one should learn exactly why this other person was coming along. Maybe she now has to watch her own elderly mother and doesn’t want to leave her in the car alone. Maybe the person is a new EMHC learning the ropes. Maybe a substitute for her when she can’t make it. Let’s find out the facts first.

 

[1ke]

I’m on disability and homebound. Therefore, I rarely get to attend Holy Mass.
I’ve had many stressors since March, 2010, which cause me to feel more anxiety than usual.
Wednesday, 20OCT2010, the EM (Eucharistic Minister) sent to me a text message which said that she was going to bring with her a stranger; a new person in this Church who I don’t know. I told her that my anxiety was bad to the point of having an anxiety attack from the thought of meeting someone new. Her response: “…maybe we need 2 wait till next week so u can think about it.”
At this time I’m in need of God’s Saving Grace more than usual; how can this EM deny me the receipt of Jesus Christ?
Thank you.

Scoochy

P.S.: I posted this as a “New Thread” earlier today, but never have received a response from you yet.

Why are you asking people on an intenet forum why someone did what they did? We have NO IDEA and anything posted here is merely speculation and won’t do you any good.

You need to ask the person herself. You might have misunderstood her or she might have misunderstood you. I mean, really, a text message? Call and talk to her.

 

[Newbie2]

Yep, I think a phone call is in order. Call the EMHC first and talk it over. If there’s still a problem, call the parish office.

I’m guessing the Priest has other things to do than get involved with things like this, unless there is a genuine problem, which we won’t know until the OP and the EMHC talk.

“What we have here is a failure to communicate”

 

[paperwight66]

You have to report this case to the pastor of the parish. I believe that laywomen should be severely disciplined, if she acted on her own.

Unless the sentence ‘I believe that laywomen should be severely punished’ is a mis-typing for ‘I believe that laywoman…’ (i.e. that particular one in the OP), alarm-bells are ringing louder than an oldfashioned fire engine.

lazlo, please explain. Did you really mean to say that laywomen, as opposed to lay people, should be treated so severely? And potentially unjustly, I could add, until we know the whole story. Would it have made any difference if the EMHC had been a man, and if so, why?

 

[SimonDodd]

Unless the sentence ‘I believe that laywomen should be severely punished’ is a mis-typing for ‘I believe that laywoman…’ (i.e. that particular one in the OP), alarm-bells are ringing louder than an oldfashioned fire engine.

lazlo, please explain. Did you really mean to say that laywomen, as opposed to lay people, should be treated so severely? And potentially unjustly, I could add, until we know the whole story. Would it have made any difference if the EMHC had been a man, and if so, why?

Ease off that trigger, pilgrim. In context, it’s pretty obvious that Lazlo meant “that laywoman” as the object of his sentence: “I believe that [pronoun referring to the following word] laywomen [read laywoman] should be severely disciplined, if she acted on her own.” What he means is “I believe that that laywoman should be severely disciplined if she acted on her own” (and what he probably should have written is “I believe that the laywoman”), but it’s common for people to shy away from consecutive "that"s, suspecting—wrongly—that it’s somehow bad English, and to omit the conjunctive “that.” The result, as we have seen, is ambiguity, particularly when combined with the typo. Nevertheless, the auxiliary clause (“if she acted on her own”), which refers to the specific woman implied by the context, makes it pellucidly clear that the generic plural “women” was an error.

And parsing the grammar aside, just apply common sense: When discussing a specific laywoman’s alleged misbehavior, which is the more likely reading of an ambiguous statement: a random suggestion that laywomen, generically, should be severely disciplined, for no apparent reason, or a suggestion apt to the context that this laywoman, specifically, should be disciplined, for the behavior being discussed?

I say “alleged,” by the way, because I agree with the posters above who urge the OP to just talk to the EMHC (not a “Eucharistic Minister,” by the way, unless he’s a bishop, priest, or deacon). This sounds like a simple miscommunication, and it isn’t going to be fixed by asking complete strangers on the internet.

 

[dconklin]

You have to report this case to the pastor of the parish. I believe that laywomen should be severely disciplined, if she acted on her own.

Everyone remain calm! The Church Police/Judge/Jury :knight2: have arrived. How severely can a lay minister be punished? The OP says she was denied. From the little info posted, it sounds like the OP denied the lay minister.

This sounds like a case of misinformation or lack of information - definitely not a punishable offence.

 

[PattiDay]

You have to report this case to the pastor of the parish. I believe that laywomen should be severely disciplined, if she acted on her own.

Why speculate on the reasons the EM said she was bringing a second person or why, upon learning that you didn’t want this, she didn’t just bring the Eucharist to you, as is her duty, her ministry.

I would not call or text the individual further, as this is likely to elevate any existing misunderstanding. Call your priest, tell him the Eucharist was not brought to you, tell him about the message you received and your response. Let the priest take it from there, to arrange for the Eucharist to be brought to you at the earliest possible time, to investigate the reason why the Eucharist was withheld, and to take whatever steps are necessary to ensure this never happens again to you or any other member of your parish.