6 months on, still feeling homosexual

[Maxply]

… now that’s positive: another homosexual propagandist chips in. Should be stricken from the boards simply by claiming the “commentator” name.

 

[Commentator]

1. Commentator is just an easy user name to remember.
2. I’m definitely not a homosexual propagandist.
3. I would suggest that you try to be a little more charitable it your posts.

Peace

 

[Joseph_Michael]

Commentator,

Well, i waited until someone else spoke up, but offering the second option was not very wise. It is anti-catholic, and i am a chaste homosexual catholic myself. Sex is not an option. Your conscience must be “formed” by Church teaching. You cannot just say “it is not a sin for me” and then live in sin.

That was very bad advice to a 16 year old man who is questioning himself.

I love you in Christ, but i feel you were wrong,

Joseph

 

[goofyjim]

Commentator,

Well, i waited until someone else spoke up, but offering the second option was not very wise. It is anti-catholic, and i am a chaste homosexual catholic myself. Sex is not an option. Your conscience must be “formed” by Church teaching. You cannot just say “it is not a sin for me” and then live in sin.

That was very bad advice to a 16 year old man who is questioning himself.

I love you in Christ, but i feel you were wrong,

Joseph

I agree that sex is not an option but the young lad should certainly get the disordered notion out of his head.

 

[Renton405]

Have you tried antidepressants?? You may be depressed, which is common in people with homosexual urges… Antidepressants also reduce the sex drive so it will reduce the urges and help you concentrate on the more important things…

Don’t totally shun women from your life… Married with the woman you love and your own kids is absolutly the BEST gift there is on earth… In homosexual relationships you cannot have your own children. So there is a part that will always remain unfullfilled… And children are the only thing on earth that really completes this life(with God and your wife) …As King Soloman says, most everything else is a chase after the wind

 

[goofyjim]

Have you tried antidepressants?? You may be depressed, which is common in people with homosexual urges… Antidepressants also reduce the sex drive so it will reduce the urges and help you concentrate on the more important things…

Don’t totally shun women from your life… Married with the woman you love and your own kids is absolutly the BEST gift there is on earth… In homosexual relationships you cannot have your own children. So there is a part that will always remain unfullfilled… And children are the only thing on earth that really completes this life(with God and your wife) …As King Soloman says, most everything else is a chase after the wind

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Is one feeling homosexual urges because they are depressed, or are they depressed because they feel homosexual urges and are told they are disordered?

 

[Riley259]

I agree that sex is not an option but the young lad should certainly get the disordered notion out of his head.

But the truth is (whether you like it or not) homosexuality is disordered. It’s not natural and it’s not ordered to the natural law. I commend all those who remain chaste.

 

[goofyjim]

But the truth is (whether you like it or not) homosexuality is disordered. It’s not natural and it’s not ordered to the natural law. I commend all those who remain chaste.

Calling SSA disordered is not necessary to be a faithful Catholic so I will not do so.

 

[Maxply]

Homosexuality is a disordered sexual response, largely explained by a web of socio-cultural-familial influences. There is indication that homosexuals have a modest biological predilection for this activity, but to say “it’s biology” is an exaggeration.

The BIG problem I see is that many/most homosexuals somehow want to avoid the problem, and throw it off onto other people’s shoulders. Duck the issue by creating/crafting the whole “homophobia” card.

 

[Maxply]

And, you know, if I were talking to a 16 year old or 17 year old who says he thinks he’s gay, I would take the time to explain the complexity of sexual identity, and suggest that it’s a bit early to know anything for certain. VERY possible to have an adult homosexual take advantage of uncertain feelings and frustrations there.

 

[goofyjim]

And, you know, if I were talking to a 16 year old or 17 year old who says he thinks he’s gay, I would take the time to explain the complexity of sexual identity, and suggest that it’s a bit early to know anything for certain. VERY possible to have an adult homosexual take advantage of uncertain feelings and frustrations there.

Agreed, but OTOH if the feelings persist he need not get depressed. Homosexual urges are not wrong, only acting on them is. So he joins a group like Courage and gets his support there.

 

[goofyjim]

Homosexuality is a disordered sexual response, largely explained by a web of socio-cultural-familial influences. There is indication that homosexuals have a modest biological predilection for this activity, but to say “it’s biology” is an exaggeration.

The BIG problem I see is that many/most homosexuals somehow want to avoid the problem, and throw it off onto other people’s shoulders. Duck the issue by creating/crafting the whole “homophobia” card.

While there is no predilection for activity there is every reason in the world to believe that the attraction is biological. Just like a guy may find blondes more attractive than brunettes.

 

[Renton405]

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Is one feeling homosexual urges because they are depressed, or are they depressed because they feel homosexual urges and are told they are disordered?

Probably both… One from the sexual urges and the other from feeling guilty…Then there is the moral conscious that is nagging at you everytime you commit something like sodomy(post-coital depression)

i think there is a moral conscious that just knows that it is wrong deep down. Which even causes more guilt. And then you have the outer world and the risks of the life(AIDS, meth, rape, murder) which adds on to the stress…

but seriously. how many happy homosexual couples who have been married for 50+ years even exist?? Its extremely rare…A truely fullfilling marriage can only be done with the opposite sex… its impossible to do that with same sex couples. Both naturally and mentally. Homosexuality is pretty much one thing, Lust. Isntead of trying to concentrate on Lust, concentrate on the bigger things in life, and how to live a truely fullfilling life, and realize that it is impossible to do in the homosexual life…

 

[Renton405]

Agreed, but OTOH if the feelings persist he need not get depressed. Homosexual urges are not wrong, only acting on them is. So he joins a group like Courage and gets his support there.

Christ said if we even look at a woman with wrong intentions it is adultry… So it isn’t just exclusive to only the act…

 

[Joseph_Michael]

Matt. 5 v 27 "You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. NIV

No problem here. I never look at women lustfully.

Joseph

 

[goofyjim]

Christ said if we even look at a woman with wrong intentions it is adultry… So it isn’t just exclusive to only the act…

So now you contend that even the condition of SSA is sinful? You would be in disagreement with th Church there, my friend.

 

[Renton405]

So now you contend that even the condition of SSA is sinful? You would be in disagreement with th Church there, my friend.

Please state where I disagree with the church…I was citing scripture showing that if you look at someone with lust it is adultry…

You consider Lust a condition??

 

[cledwyn]

Hello to you all,

I posted here about 6 months ago because I had a problem that I had homosexual feelings, and I received some good advice. i listened to it all and decided on some actions to take, but I fear things have not got better.

Let me reintroduce. I am a 16 year old boy. When I last posted, any attraction of this sort to people I had had was exclusively homosexual. This is how it remains. I had then never ‘done’ anything, never acted on the feelings. This also is how it remains.

I will be really honest with you because I think through complete honesty is the only way I can hope to be helped. I will tell them exactly as they are:
To some degree it is sexual feelings, and desire of that nature. But also, possibley more so, it is not about sex. I, like most people, want to have a loving relationship. But when I imagine this, I imagine it to be with a man. Almost as if I am the woman. Though to clairfiy, I do not want to be a woman.

I have felt this so many years, and it does not go away, so this is what I do:

I have tried to have a good prayer life and in this way build up a strong relationship with our Lord, and the Blessed Virgin Mary. I pray to them, and to Saint Agnes for purity that I can behave always in the right way, and be controlled and chaste.

I try for to have as good spiritual life as possible; I try to do much outreach and be a good person, I volunteer for learning disability charity, and donated to homeless shelter.
I go to Mass and recieve communion regularly, and adoration, and confessional…though, I must say…I have never confessed to this because I am too scared, and I find I can barely even say the words.

But…I still feel exactly as I did. I wonder, what is to happen, if these feelings never go away? What will happen in my life then, what should I do in this case?

Thank you x

this is difficult, let me tell you of my own journey, a little of it, i have always felt gay and have always loved our Lord and mary and been a practising catholic most of my life, seek the lord in prayer, talk to him and go and see a good counsellor, perhaps a gay mean would help, it is not easy, and i have now learnt to accept myself for who i am, to know that i am loved, do know that God is a part of my life, i enjoy going to mass, i receive the sacraments, the answer for all of this lies within yourself, and also you can trust yourself, surround yourself with loving men and women, people who have journeyed with the lord for some time and can really support you, in honesty and truth, no matter how difficult it can get, and remember, regardless, Jesus himself loves you so much, so much that he died for you, all of you and that he knows your deepest yearnings and your deepest fears, all the very best with this, may the lord bless you and keep you.

 

[dapper]

I have been with my partner for 5 years. No depression here, only love!

I guess I should just chalk that whole statement up to homosexual propaganda!

 

[Joseph_Michael]

…I was citing scripture showing that if you look at someone with lust it is adultry…

Actually it says look at a woman with lust

Woman ; the greek word gynē :

1. a woman of any age, whether a virgin, or married, or a widow
2. a wife
   
   a) of a betrothed woman

---

There are better scriptures that deal with lust in general.

Joseph