7 year-old's birthday on Good Friday

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My niece’s 7th birthday is this Friday. My sister has invited the entire family over to dinner to celebrate. I plan for that dinner to be my full meal. I’m curious though. Should I eat a slice a cake when offered or is dessert not allowed on a day of fasting? If you were my sister, would you even serve cake?

Sorry if this is the wrong forum for this question.
 
On a day of fasting you are allowed one ordinary meal and two other things during the course of the day that would not, together, add up to a full meal. I would think a not-overly-large slice of cake would fall into the latter category. Not very penitential, true, but there is no requirement about what your food that day should consist of – except that it may contain no meat, of course.
 
Sorry to be blunt, but if I were your sister, I wouldn’t have a b-day celebration on Good Friday, even a child’s b-day. I would move it to Saturday and explain to my child why. This would be good witness to my child about what’s more important.

If I were you, I wouldn’t go to the dinner. Good Friday is not just about how much we are allowed to eat; it’s about the whole approach toward the day - the day our Lord died. I know some Catholics go out to eat on Good Friday like it was just another day of the year, and order fish, but I personally believe this misses the whole point.

To answer your question though, no, I wouldn’t eat dessert should I somehow end up at the dinner in the first place.
 
Rutabaga said:
My niece’s 7th birthday is this Friday. My sister has invited the entire family over to dinner to celebrate. I plan for that dinner to be my full meal. I’m curious though. Should I eat a slice a cake when offered or is dessert not allowed on a day of fasting? If you were my sister, would you even serve cake?

Sorry if this is the wrong forum for this question.
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On Good Friday we are supposed to be one with the suffering of Christ–in a very somber way–in order to feel His pain so that this way, we may be more connected to Him. Cake is by no means appropriate and I hope you teach your child to be somber on that day. (Sorry to sound so strict, but I’m just plain-spoken. There is a place and a time for almost everything under the sun.)
 
My birthday is on March 31st - this year it’s Easter Sunday, but I’ve had a couple on Good Friday!

My parents deferred it to Holy Saturday.

Did it suck spending 3 hours on my knees on my birthday and fasting when I was a kid?

Well it did actually - but I survived:p
 
I would go to the dinner to see my niece. Whether it should have been held on Good Friday was not up to you. There is no Church rule about eating cake on a fast day. It is up to you.
 
Rutabaga said:
My niece’s 7th birthday is this Friday. My sister has invited the entire family over to dinner to celebrate. I plan for that dinner to be my full meal. I’m curious though. Should I eat a slice a cake when offered or is dessert not allowed on a day of fasting? If you were my sister, would you even serve cake?
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I would go to my niece’s family celebration of the day of her birth.

If you want a normal size serving of cake, you can eat it. If you decide not to eat cake because it is Good Friday, I wouldn’t mention that reason to the birthday girl. There are no rules that one can not eat cake on Good Friday.

There are no rules that one can not have a celebration dinner with family on Good Friday.

There are no rules that one can not celebrate a birthday on Good Friday.

There are no rules one should even attend a Good Friday Service.

One can apply their own form of Good Friday observance, but they are personal, except that it is a day of fast - meaning one full meal and two smaller meals not to equal one full meal and no meat for the day.

If I was your sister, I would serve my child’s birthday cake. The birthday dessert is a cultural form of “the birthday”. To me, its the point that says, “This is the celebration”.

I like your sister’s plan of having a family dinner to celebrate her child’s birthday. 🍰

Enjoy your family celebration with the birthday girl!
 
PaulfromIowa said:
I would go to the dinner to see my niece. Whether it should have been held on Good Friday was not up to you. There is no Church rule about eating cake on a fast day. It is up to you.
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Agreed. The world doesn’t stop because it’s Good Friday. I will get up and go to work like it’s any normal day.
 
triumphguy said:
My birthday is on March 31st - this year it’s Easter Sunday, but I’ve had a couple on Good Friday!

My parents deferred it to Holy Saturday.

Did it suck spending 3 hours on my knees on my birthday and fasting when I was a kid?

Well it did actually - but I survived:p
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LOL. I’m glad you did survive. Thanks for writing this. I think you gave the OP the best answer possible. Happy Birthday.
 
My birthday is on Good Friday this year, too. However as an adult, I don’t mind too much.

As this is not really under your control, I would go ahead and attend, and maybe say you will have your slice of cake to go, and eat it the next day.

I will be attending the Good Friday services at my church, and there’s no post on Good Friday so no cards or gifts to open.

Hope your neice has a lovely day, surrounded by her loving family!
 
LisaB said:
Sorry to be blunt, but if I were your sister, I wouldn’t have a b-day celebration on Good Friday, even a child’s b-day. I would move it to Saturday and explain to my child why. This would be good witness to my child about what’s more important.
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I would move it to Easter Saturday and explain why.
 
You have an opportunity here to be a witness. But do so gently.

You must not break your own fast unless to do so would cause serious scandal - which should not be the case in a family situation.

However your own fast can be maintained as others have said by being selective about the food you eat. Let your sister know in advance that you will not be eating meat from a warm-blooded animal on that day. (Meat from a mammal or bird)

After the even you could suggest to your sister (or brother) that in future years you niece is old enough to understand that a Party should be moved to an alternative day if it falls on Good Friday.

I will have this with my daughter, as her birthday falls within the Easter Season. She was born on Easter Tuesday. therefore it is very likely that her birthday will fall on Good Friday some years. (Possible dates for Easter are 22 March to 25 April. so approximately 1 in 12 people can be affected by this. My son narrowly missed it)
 
My wedding aniversary is on april 6. But we married on Easter Saturday. So we do not celebrate on April 6. We ALWAYS celebrate on Easter Saturday.

Avantages: Always out of lent
Always on the weekend

Disadvantage: we get cards either early or late. and we wait to open them.

So if the little one’s birthday could be related to Easter on the year he was born. Make his birthday a movable feast. Just like the annunciation this year. Moved from March 25 to April 8.
 
God will be smiling upon your niece and will be happy to see her happy with the family.

God is a reasonable fellow who knows quite well the effects of what he created, one of those things being scheduling conflicts. He had one of his own when He wasn’t ready to start his public life and His mother asked for a miracle.

Sounds like you understand the letter of the law, consider the spirit of the law and do what you need to do when you can, but I wouldn’t assume God faults people for having birthday parties.

God loves births. Mothers giving birth this Friday AM will need to eat each meal the hospital will provide. Fasting would not be healthy, and God understands.

For that matter, pregnant mothers need to eat as well. Very much understandable.
 
ffg said:
For that matter, pregnant mothers need to eat as well. Very much understandable.
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So do we diabetics, and we’re all exempt from fasting rules 😉

I agree with you on the spirit vs. letter of the law.

As you say God is reasonable!
 
Evan said:
My wedding aniversary is on april 6. But we married on Easter Saturday. So we do not celebrate on April 6. We ALWAYS celebrate on Easter Saturday.

Avantages: Always out of lent
Always on the weekend

Disadvantage: we get cards either early or late. and we wait to open them.

So if the little one’s birthday could be related to Easter on the year he was born. Make his birthday a movable feast. Just like the annunciation this year. Moved from March 25 to April 8.
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My daughter was born on Ash Wednesday. We do NOT move her birthday to stay with the “day”. 😛 In fact each year that it is outside of Lent we have a super party. 😃 She is old enough now that missing out on a birthday party is not an issue, but there will always be years when she’ll celebrate early to avoid having a Lenten party.
 
LisaB said:
Sorry to be blunt, but if I were your sister, I wouldn’t have a b-day celebration on Good Friday, even a child’s b-day. I would move it to Saturday and explain to my child why. This would be good witness to my child about what’s more important.

If I were you, I wouldn’t go to the dinner. Good Friday is not just about how much we are allowed to eat; it’s about the whole approach toward the day - the day our Lord died. I know some Catholics go out to eat on Good Friday like it was just another day of the year, and order fish, but I personally believe this misses the whole point.

To answer your question though, no, I wouldn’t eat dessert should I somehow end up at the dinner in the first place.
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Wow! Fasting all day and going to the party and wishing him a good birthday is wrong. I may not go to the party myself, but your wording is parental rather then brotherly/sisterly.
 
Mrs_Sally said:
My daughter was born on Ash Wednesday. We do NOT move her birthday to stay with the “day”. 😛 In fact each year that it is outside of Lent we have a super party. 😃 She is old enough now that missing out on a birthday party is not an issue, but there will always be years when she’ll celebrate early to avoid having a Lenten party.
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And that is great. Remember you said that she is old enough to know better now. 👍
 
wxornot said:
And that is great. Remember you said that she is old enough to know better now. 👍
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Yes, not 7 anymore.😉 And since OP is not the mom she can only do so much. I think a simple family dinner is a reasonable compromise between no party and a full-out kids party on Good Friday. Perhaps afterwards the OP can talk to her sister about ideas for next time.
 
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