A desperate pariah

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HardtoHear

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I had a former friend of mine tell me on Facebook the other day that she was “warned” about me by her friends at the gym, but she gave being my friend a chance.

I am shy and I don’t like rejection. I have OCD. I also have a habit of befriending women I see at the gym through FB, or trying to befriend them. I feel I communicate better in the written word. I know it comes across as creepy. Often I get upset with them if they don’t write me back or don’t want to talk, and it alienates them.

I can be really nasty with the written word.

I always knew I was a pariah, but to hear it from someone else just hurts so much. Because in person I am a nice man. I just have nothing going for me. I feel so low all the time. Maybe I feel that if they know me with the written word they won’t judge me as harshly. But it always backfired.

I am insane, and as I get older I feel like I’m going to get worse. I keep on waiting for a miracle of some sort. I have people to take care of, and I can’t juggle my OCD and this responsibility. So I just got done praying a 54 day novena to Mary that I could have the money to take care of myself and others. My prayer has not been answered as yet, or my answer is ‘no’.

I just have no niche in life, nothing I’m known for. No women, no children, no accomplishments, nothing.

I have devolved into exactly the kind of person I didn’t want to be- an outcast, a loathesome human being.

I do believe in miracles. BUt I wonder if God is out of the miracle business. I Need help.

Thank you.
 
A prayer against depression

O Christ Jesus
When all is darkness
And we feel our weakness and helplessness,
Give us the sense of Your Presence,
Your Love and Your Strength.
Help us to have perfect trust
In Your protecting love
And strengthening power,
So that nothing may frighten or worry us,
For, living close to You,
We shall see Your Hand,
Your Purpose, Your Will through all things.

By St. Ignatius of Loyola

:signofcross:
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†
 
Hail, Holy Queen, Mother of mercy! Our life, our sweetness, our hope!
To Thee do we cry, poor banished children of Eve. To Thee do we send up our sighs,
mourning and weeping in this vale of tears.
Turn then, most gracious advocate, thine eyes of mercy toward us, and after this our exile,
show unto us the blessed fruit of Thy womb, Jesus.
O clement, O loving, O sweet Virgin Mary. Pray for us O Holy Mother of God; that we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.

Amen.

Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day, our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us; and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.

Hail Mary, full of grace the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou, amongst women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.

Please do not despair.
 
HardtoHear said:
I had a former friend of mine tell me on Facebook the other day that she was “warned” about me by her friends at the gym, but she gave being my friend a chance.

I am shy and I don’t like rejection. I have OCD. I also have a habit of befriending women I see at the gym through FB, or trying to befriend them. I feel I communicate better in the written word. I know it comes across as creepy. Often I get upset with them if they don’t write me back or don’t want to talk, and it alienates them.

I can be really nasty with the written word.

I always knew I was a pariah, but to hear it from someone else just hurts so much. Because in person I am a nice man. I just have nothing going for me. I feel so low all the time. Maybe I feel that if they know me with the written word they won’t judge me as harshly. But it always backfired.

I am insane, and as I get older I feel like I’m going to get worse. I keep on waiting for a miracle of some sort. I have people to take care of, and I can’t juggle my OCD and this responsibility. So I just got done praying a 54 day novena to Mary that I could have the money to take care of myself and others. My prayer has not been answered as yet, or my answer is ‘no’.

I just have no niche in life, nothing I’m known for. No women, no children, no accomplishments, nothing.

I have devolved into exactly the kind of person I didn’t want to be- an outcast, a loathesome human being.

I do believe in miracles. BUt I wonder if God is out of the miracle business. I Need help.

Thank you.
Click to expand...
You sound like a poor man, I feel sorry for you but remember someone is madly in love with you

his name is jesus

bless his name forever enduring as long as the sun
 
Praying that the Lord may grant you all necessary graces. Also praying that He may grant you the miracles and help that you are seeking.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen
 
HardtoHear said:
I had a former friend of mine tell me on Facebook the other day that she was “warned” about me by her friends at the gym, but she gave being my friend a chance.

I am shy and I don’t like rejection. I have OCD. I also have a habit of befriending women I see at the gym through FB, or trying to befriend them. I feel I communicate better in the written word. I know it comes across as creepy. Often I get upset with them if they don’t write me back or don’t want to talk, and it alienates them.

I can be really nasty with the written word.

I always knew I was a pariah, but to hear it from someone else just hurts so much. Because in person I am a nice man. I just have nothing going for me. I feel so low all the time. Maybe I feel that if they know me with the written word they won’t judge me as harshly. But it always backfired.

I am insane, and as I get older I feel like I’m going to get worse. I keep on waiting for a miracle of some sort. I have people to take care of, and I can’t juggle my OCD and this responsibility. So I just got done praying a 54 day novena to Mary that I could have the money to take care of myself and others. My prayer has not been answered as yet, or my answer is ‘no’.

I just have no niche in life, nothing I’m known for. No women, no children, no accomplishments, nothing.

I have devolved into exactly the kind of person I didn’t want to be- an outcast, a loathesome human being.

I do believe in miracles. BUt I wonder if God is out of the miracle business. I Need help.

Thank you.
Click to expand...
Praying for your intentions.
 
St. Michael the Archangel,
defend us in battle.
Be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the Devil.
May God rebuke him, we humbly pray,
and do thou,
O Prince of the heavenly hosts,
by the power of God,
thrust into hell Satan,
and all the evil spirits,*
who prowl about the world
seeking the ruin of souls.

Amen.
 
HardtoHear said:
I had a former friend of mine tell me on Facebook the other day that she was “warned” about me by her friends at the gym, but she gave being my friend a chance.

I am shy and I don’t like rejection. I have OCD. I also have a habit of befriending women I see at the gym through FB, or trying to befriend them. I feel I communicate better in the written word. I know it comes across as creepy. Often I get upset with them if they don’t write me back or don’t want to talk, and it alienates them.

I can be really nasty with the written word.

I always knew I was a pariah, but to hear it from someone else just hurts so much. Because in person I am a nice man. I just have nothing going for me. I feel so low all the time. Maybe I feel that if they know me with the written word they won’t judge me as harshly. But it always backfired.

I am insane, and as I get older I feel like I’m going to get worse. I keep on waiting for a miracle of some sort. I have people to take care of, and I can’t juggle my OCD and this responsibility. So I just got done praying a 54 day novena to Mary that I could have the money to take care of myself and others. My prayer has not been answered as yet, or my answer is ‘no’.

I just have no niche in life, nothing I’m known for. No women, no children, no accomplishments, nothing.

I have devolved into exactly the kind of person I didn’t want to be- an outcast, a loathesome human being.

I do believe in miracles. BUt I wonder if God is out of the miracle business. I Need help.

Thank you.
Click to expand...
I am so sorry you are struggling as I hear your agony but although this may be hard to hear you really need to focus not on yourself as much as a relationship between just you and Jesus. He loves you sooooo very much and is able to give you a joy that is so deep and satisfying that all the so called desires that you feel are important to help you feel fullfilled are but empty holes. You must cultivate a real relationship with Jesus. He is the answer to lift you from darkness to light! I recommend that you go to an Adoration Chapel at your local parish or one near you and ask the Holy Spirit to fill you with Love for Jesus and guide you in the faith. Also, discuss with a priest the direction your life needs and ask if there are any retreats you could go to. PLEASE make an attempt to fill Christ in your life and I assure you that HE will fill it with JOY! Joy is far deeper and richer than “happiness”…it is eternal. I will pray for you to get direction.

mlz
 
HardtoHear said:
I do believe in miracles. BUt I wonder if God is out of the miracle business. I Need help.

Thank you.
Click to expand...
HardtoHear, God is NEVER out of the miracle business. This would be impossible, for His very existence is a miracle in itself. You can, indeed, believe that our Lord is real, and He is able to perform any act He chooses. As well, thankfully for us, He is also a God of love, mercy, and compassion.

I am sorry you are undergoing such hurt. Life can seem very unfair at times. Even so, allow God’s word of cheer to rest within your heart. The Bible says that we are fearfully and wonderfully made; marvellous are His works (Psalms 139:14). There is no reason for you to entertain wretched feelings about yourself. Whatever challenges you face, you are and remain a child of God, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Hold to that! Claim it! Yes, our bodies decline over time, due to the taint of sin. You may not deem yourself the most handsome and charming of men. What matters more than your outward appearance, however, is how you feel about yourself inside. If you believe you are not appealing to others, you will come across that way. If you dwell on your self-perceived deficiencies, you will always exude inadequacy.

HardtoHear, God does not want us to feel badly about ourselves. In His Holy Word, He repeats again and again that He loves us. Jesus came to die a miserable death for us. You were bought with a price. You have worth and meaning! Let THIS be your strength, your utmost source of sanity and love. Judge yourself by all you have in Him. See yourself through heaven’s eyes, rather than your own; and in time you may find that the people around you, in turn, will discern that very beauty in you.

The miracle you ultimately seek, HardtoHear, has already come to pass: God cares about you, therefore, you have hope in Him–the promise of help to see you through your earthly troubles, grace and forgiveness in moments of error, and the joy of eternal life wherein you shall have an immortal body and dwell in the House of our Lord forever. Continue to pray to God and trust Him. Do not give up because you feel your prayers are not answered, or that things are not quite the way you want them. Your attitude, how you view yourself and move forward, is far more important than your problems. Think positively, exercise faith, and stay close to Jesus. This is the ultimate, life-changing formula…Count on it!!!

Do let’s pray together, in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit:

Merciful Jesus, look tenderly upon Your discouraged servant and imbue him with the virtues he needs. Teach him, Lord, to walk by faith, not by sight, and to lean on Your everlasting guidance and love. Sometimes, our lives seem so far removed from what we desire that we are moved to despair. Sometimes our hearts burn with questions, because we cannot understand You. Sometimes You seem so far away, unable or uninterested in hearing our prayers. Forgive us these moments of doubt, Lord. We ask because we are human and cannot see as You do. Instil in us, at these times, Your assurance and peace. Remind us to trust You in all our ways, with unmoving confidence that You will direct our paths.

O Lord, let us be happy in You! Let us rejoice in the meaning our lives possess, because You love us. May we never entertain cause to fear or self-loathe, but rather walk with our heads held high, and in everything praise You. For indeed, You said,
*
Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom,
Let not the mighty man glory in his might,
Nor let the rich man glory in his riches;
But let him who glories glory in this,
That he understands and knows Me,
That I am the Lord, exercising loving kindness, judgment, and righteousness in the earth.
For in these I delight,” says the Lord. (Jeremiah 9:23-24)*

So, let it be, dear Jesus, that HardtoHear, and all Your children, find their glory in You.

We ask these things in the wondrous name of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, to whom, together with the Father and Holy Spirit, be all honour, dominion, glory, and praise forever…

Ave Maria…
Pater Noster…
Gloria Patri…

Amen.:gopray:

*What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? Who shall bring a charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Who is he who condemns? It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen, who is even at the right hand of God, who also makes intercession for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written:

“For Your sake we are killed all day long;
We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.”

Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
(Romans 8:31-39)*
 
Prayer to Our Lady of Mental Peace

O Lady of Mental Peace,
Mother of Tranquility
and Mother of Hope,
look upon us in this time
of weakness and unrest.

Teach our searching hearts
to know that God’s Love
for us is unchanging and
unchangeable, and, that
true human love can only
begin and grow by touching
His Love.

Let your gentle Peace -
which this world cannot give
  • be always with us.
    And, help us to bring this
    same Peace into the lives
    of others.
Our Lady of Mental Peace,
  • Pray for us!
    Amen.
:signofcross:
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†
 
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