a little help please

  • Thread starter Thread starter jesus4ever
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
J

jesus4ever

Guest
father i was saying our fathers and hail marys while i was driving home from work. In one of the hail marys when I said “FULL OF GRACE” I stoped praying at the word GRACE and had a bad thought. it was “Mary full of something” i dont want to write it because its bad. I then continued praying as if nothing happened but could not forget about it because i was trying to work out if it was a uncontroled thought or me.

I dont know what to do.

also today somebody asked me if i read a certain book and i said no. i was thinking on saying i only like reading bioghys. at the same time i was sort of thinking of saying i like bio’s walks on the beach as a joke. but in stead of walks on the beach in thought i said sex on the bench in my mind, after i thought it i was annoyed and fustrated. is this a grave sin do i need to confess these things.

i had a very active brain latly. i felt like i had so much temptaion and so many neggtive thoughts. I could not stop all these impure images in my mind. i was going crazy and it happens when i am working at work.

i also can not look at a female with something being crated in my mind.
 
Taking your second and third points: it sounds like you’re suffering from an over-abundance of hormones. All sorts of thoughts arrive in our minds unwilled. It’s the way our unconscious minds work. Something quite mundane can trigger a sort of chain reaction that ends up with a thought we don’t like. I might randomly think about, say, shooting squirrels for fun. It doesn’t mean I’m going to or that I would actually enjoy it, but I recognise that it’s a random thought and it has no consequence. You just learn to forget them straight away, as though they were a form of momentary waking dream. It’s only by p(name removed by moderator)ointing such fleeting thoughts and worrying about the consequences of them that you start to give them a place in your life.

The key to negating these unwanted thoughts is to not give them any heed. That is a conscious decision. Distraction can be a help too, otherwise have some things you can think about as a fall back. Carry some prayer cards, a book, maybe an iPod. Once you’ve learned that, they there and gone in a flash and you don’t remember them because you’re on to something else immediately. That is the beauty of having self-will. You CAN will yourself to think about other things.

As for thinking a bad word in the midst of praying the Hail Mary, well… sad to say, the world has a bunch of idioms that begin “full of” and not all of them are nice. It’s not surprising that at some point your subconscious mind made the connection with the phrase “full of grace” and tripped you up over it. Don’t worry. You’re not at fault. You really aren’t.

As with the unbidden sexual images, you can build barriers in your mind with practise. You can sort of ‘see’ the unwanted thought coming and sort of ‘mute’ it in your mind. Mental dexterity like this is a skill, yes, but it can be done. I’m no brainiac, by any means, but I manage it, mostly. You will too. It’s just a little bit of self discipline. After a while it becomes second nature.

Above all, stop worrying about it. You’re not any different from anyone else. You’re not somehow more evil. You’re not out of control of your mind. You’re not possessed. You’re just unsure of yourself and you clearly have a tendency towards scruples.

Jesus said “I give you peace. My peace I give you. A peace the world cannot give. Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid”.

He’s waiting to give you that peace. You only need ask for it.

Take care.
 
Satan is always at work trying to snatch souls from God.
The more you try to walk the straight and narrow, the more Satan will focus on you.
So those bad thoughts were from him. So long as you reject them immediately they come to mind, you are o.k. Do not entertain them, just keep rejecting them. A prayer to St. Michael the Archangel might come in handy.
It is real war out here.
Good luck!
 
Remember for a mortal sin …one needs not only grave matter…but full knowledge and complete consent…

this will help:

(from previous posts)

Regarding thoughts

while Jesus makes it clear that one can sin in ones thoughts…just cause some lustful thought happens does not mean that one sinned…

(and one can have a sufficiently good reason to think about sexual matters…for instance studying moral theology…but care must be taken to avoid things that would be a problem…but that is another question)

What should we do with* unwanted* sexual thoughts? Those pesky temptations that can come …even though we are not seeking them etc…

(there are of course some things we should avoid that cause them…and there can be sin if it is something one should reasonably avoid…but often they come uninvited)

First…Relax. Do not worry.

Now are they mortal sins?

For a mortal sin one needs a grave matter …full knowledge AND deliberate consent!!!

A. If you do not want the thought…it the thought displeases you: it can be a sign actually that you did not give consent or do not give full consent.

B. Even if you felt a temptation for the thought – and were drawn to it —but rejected it and maybe even turned to God : again a sign not full consent.

C. But what if one has a tempting thought --say of a sexual nature and even hesitated for a moment…but then rejected it for one did not want to sin? : it can be partial consent perhaps (and thus a venial sin)-- or it may be no sin at all but rather a strong temptation that drew you but then you saw what was happening and turned away.

D. A temptation can even be very strong or the thoughts very often – but this does NOT mean one has consented! so worry not…even it they go on for a long time…

remember --for it to be mortal there must be that deliberate consent!

What to do? on the spiritual side–relax first of all and remember the above.

Next – know that the more one fears the thoughts the more likely they are to come… or said another way --the more a person seeks to avoid the thoughts the more likely he will have a problem with them. (but do not worry about this either!)

for example: for the next 10 seconds try NOT to think of an apple.

tick tock …

tick tock…

Ok what did you think of? Most likely an apple.

So it is best to ignore them and just not consent and then turn your attention to some other good thing…for instance whatever you are doing. Simply do not consent and move on. and do not worry

another point – thoughts can just happen --they are the stuff with which we think…it is up to us to consent and take them further or not. and just because they are REAL VIVID and almost “think themselves” does not mean per se that one has given ANY consent.

they can be annoying…but need cause no actual harm …

(And remember…when such unwanted thoughts come…just don’t sweat it…for if they are coming like this…out of the blue and unwanted …and your thus not then consenting to em…not even a little sin…is committed…but rather one is perhaps growing in virtue!)
 
1 Corinthians 10:13
No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

Romans 12
1Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual[a] act of worship. 2Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Philippians 4:8-9 (New International Version)

8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

Psalm 119:11
I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.

Romans 8
 
Bookcat said:
Remember for a mortal sin …one needs not only grave matter…but full knowledge and complete consent…

this will help:

(from previous posts)

Regarding thoughts

while Jesus makes it clear that one can sin in ones thoughts…just cause some lustful thought happens does not mean that one sinned…

(and one can have a sufficiently good reason to think about sexual matters…for instance studying moral theology…but care must be taken to avoid things that would be a problem…but that is another question)

What should we do with* unwanted* sexual thoughts? Those pesky temptations that can come …even though we are not seeking them etc…

(there are of course some things we should avoid that cause them…and there can be sin if it is something one should reasonably avoid…but often they come uninvited)

First…Relax. Do not worry.

Now are they mortal sins?

For a mortal sin one needs a grave matter …full knowledge AND deliberate consent!!!

A. If you do not want the thought…it the thought displeases you: it can be a sign actually that you did not give consent or do not give full consent.

B. Even if you felt a temptation for the thought – and were drawn to it —but rejected it and maybe even turned to God : again a sign not full consent.

C. But what if one has a tempting thought --say of a sexual nature and even hesitated for a moment…but then rejected it for one did not want to sin? : it can be partial consent perhaps (and thus a venial sin)-- or it may be no sin at all but rather a strong temptation that drew you but then you saw what was happening and turned away.

D. A temptation can even be very strong or the thoughts very often – but this does NOT mean one has consented! so worry not…even it they go on for a long time…

remember --for it to be mortal there must be that deliberate consent!

What to do? on the spiritual side–relax first of all and remember the above.

Next – know that the more one fears the thoughts the more likely they are to come… or said another way --the more a person seeks to avoid the thoughts the more likely he will have a problem with them. (but do not worry about this either!)

for example: for the next 10 seconds try NOT to think of an apple.

tick tock …

tick tock…

Ok what did you think of? Most likely an apple.

So it is best to ignore them and just not consent and then turn your attention to some other good thing…for instance whatever you are doing. Simply do not consent and move on. and do not worry

another point – thoughts can just happen --they are the stuff with which we think…it is up to us to consent and take them further or not. and just because they are REAL VIVID and almost “think themselves” does not mean per se that one has given ANY consent.

they can be annoying…but need cause no actual harm …

(And remember…when such unwanted thoughts come…just don’t sweat it…for if they are coming like this…out of the blue and unwanted …and your thus not then consenting to em…not even a little sin…is committed…but rather one is perhaps growing in virtue!)
Click to expand...
Sometimes I think of these thoughts as “little tests” that the Almighty challenges us with. Sort of like conditioning…if we can resist a lot of the “little” sins, we get in better shape for the “bigger” temptations that we all face.
 
all these things is good info however like today one lady that i work with came into work she smelled nice and i felt attracted to her then a impure image started in my head briefly before i took control and stoped it. people say if one finds a thought in ones head what if one starts the thought due to habbit and weakness then take control is that mortal for starting it because if it is then their is no way i can ever be in a state of grace
 
Now just stop right there…

Mortal sin requires grave matter, understanding AND conscious assent. Habits are hard to break. If you do/think something which you don’t catch in time because you’re habituated towards doing it, then you’re not making a conscious assent to the thing. Therefore you simply CAN’T be in a state of mortal sin.

Thoughts that are dismissed when you realise what they are simply NOT sinful.

The only way in which you can sin in thought is by dwelling on the thought and ASSENTING to it and incorporating it into your beliefs.

If you deliberately decided to take that lustful and erotic thought and then continued to stare at the woman with the purposeful intention of inciting in yourself deliberate and gratuitous lust, then yes you’d be sinning.

If you catch a glimpse of a woman who has a form of body shape which you are attracted to, that is NOT sinful. If it were, everyone would have to walk around with paper bags on their heads.

Your instincts are natural. They are God given. It’s how He ordered the world. Don’t be frightened of them. Be thankful for them - you’re a red blooded male. It’s innate to your nature. Think of it this way: there are many men who suffer same sex attraction who would give everything they have to think the way you do so that they could live a ‘normal’ life.

There is NOTHING wrong in recognising the beauty and attractiveness of a woman.

Let me reiterate this in the simplest possible terms.

YOU DID NOT SIN.
 
jesus4ever said:
all these things is good info however like today one lady that i work with came into work she smelled nice and i felt attracted to her then a impure image started in my head briefly before i took control and stoped it. people say if one finds a thought in ones head what if one starts the thought due to habbit and weakness then take control is that mortal for starting it because if it is then their is no way i can ever be in a state of grace
Click to expand...
People will say anything jesus4ever!
What is important is the relationship you have with God .God sees what is in your heart and you also know what is in your heart, nobody else does, so nobody can judge or tell you that you have sinned.You felt attracted to your work mate because she smelt nice, that is normal animal behavior, remember we are animals, but we are also humans created in God’s image. We are able to control those animal urges with the Graces that God gives us. You did just that. You rejected the thought and the image. You ‘took control’ as you put it ‘and stopped it’, so where is the sin?
You were tempted, that is a fact, but you overcame the temptation. Remember Our Lord too was tempted in the desert, after He had fasted for 40 days and 40 nights and was therefore vulnerable?
God Bless
 
jesus4ever said:
all these things is good info however like today one lady that i work with came into work she smelled nice and i felt attracted to her then a impure image started in my head briefly before i took control and stoped it. people say if one finds a thought in ones head what if one starts the thought due to habbit and weakness then take control is that mortal for starting it because if it is then their is no way i can ever be in a state of grace
Click to expand...
I refer you to my “thoughts” post above…read it a few times…perhaps print it out…it has a lot in it…
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top