K
krissy343
Guest
Hello 
Iāve posted bits and pieces on other threads but right now, Iām feeling the need to get my story out there and to get some help from you wonderful people!
I drifted away from The Church years ago, actually, I donāt think I was really and truly ever really involved. Sure, I went to Church with my parents, attended Catholic Schools, participated in all the necessary Sacraments etc. but I think I was just doing all the motions and wasnāt into it with my whole heart. Anywaysā¦ I was made to go to Mass every Sunday until I was appx 16 I think. Thatās when I began drifting. I started being promiscuous, lying, stealing, pretty much, all the bad stuff. I completely drifted from the Church, though deep down inside I still had some faith. I then got kicked out of my parents house (not getting into all the details) moved into my own apartment, began sleeping with just about any man I could get my hands on, even a few women. I had my boyfriend, a total loser, move in with me for a couple months. He left, I moved on to the next guy. Ok, I think you get the picture. In that time I did tons of drugs, was drunk VERY often, couldnāt hold down a jobā¦ Finally, things in my life started looking up. I found a great job caring for mentally disabled individuals, which I still do today. I met my husband who was, at the time, a fallen-away Catholic. We got married in a chapel in Gatlinburg, TN in 2003 and began trying for a baby. Nothing! So I finally went to the Dr. and was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and told that it would be difficult for me to conceive naturally. The Dr. then recommended that my husband get checked out as well. Well, his sperm analysis came back bad as well but they told him that he could probably reverse that on his own with changes in diet and some other stuff Iām not getting into lol. So, I pretty much just freaked out and gave up hope. Our marriage started getting rocky and we separated for about 3 months and within that time I was unfaithful. During that time, I realized that there was no other man on earth that I wanted to be with other than my husband so we got back together, I told him of my infidelity and though he was very hurt, we reconciled and had been doing fairly well.
A couple months back I was flipping through the channels and stumbled across the Jim Bakker show lol yeah, I knowā¦ He was endorsing a Bible on CD series read by women. I thought to myself, Hey that would be great! I can listen to it in the car, while Iām on the computer etc. but I didnāt feel comfortable ordering it from him given his past. So, I got on ebay, ordered it, got it in the mail a few days later and popped it in right away. Mind you, this is before I realized there was a difference between the Catholic versions and the Protestant Versions that I had just purchased. But hey, it was still the Bible! That made me feel sooooo good hearing Godās word again! A few days after that I was flipping through the channels again and came across Mother Angelica! Iād seen her before but never thought a nun would be that interesting. Well, something made me stop and listen and it changed my life!!! I honestly canāt even remember what the show was about but I remember saying to myself āas of this moment, I am changing my lifeā and I did. I went out and purchased a ton of literature, began reading my Bible, got it set up to get our marriage (finally) convalidated in the Church, became addicted to catholicanswers, more as a lurker than a poster but hey, Iāve learned a ton!!! Went to Confession after over 10 years, began going to Church againā¦ My life literally changed in a matter of minutes. I am on cloud nine!
My only fear now is that this feeling will eventually wear off. I donāt ever want to go back to the place I was a couple months back, a life without God was MISERABLE!!
Iāve begun praying the Rosary and the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, attending the occasional weekday Mass in addition to Sunday along with my other daily prayers and almost constant conversation with Christ. Continued below:
Iāve posted bits and pieces on other threads but right now, Iām feeling the need to get my story out there and to get some help from you wonderful people!I drifted away from The Church years ago, actually, I donāt think I was really and truly ever really involved. Sure, I went to Church with my parents, attended Catholic Schools, participated in all the necessary Sacraments etc. but I think I was just doing all the motions and wasnāt into it with my whole heart. Anywaysā¦ I was made to go to Mass every Sunday until I was appx 16 I think. Thatās when I began drifting. I started being promiscuous, lying, stealing, pretty much, all the bad stuff. I completely drifted from the Church, though deep down inside I still had some faith. I then got kicked out of my parents house (not getting into all the details) moved into my own apartment, began sleeping with just about any man I could get my hands on, even a few women. I had my boyfriend, a total loser, move in with me for a couple months. He left, I moved on to the next guy. Ok, I think you get the picture. In that time I did tons of drugs, was drunk VERY often, couldnāt hold down a jobā¦ Finally, things in my life started looking up. I found a great job caring for mentally disabled individuals, which I still do today. I met my husband who was, at the time, a fallen-away Catholic. We got married in a chapel in Gatlinburg, TN in 2003 and began trying for a baby. Nothing! So I finally went to the Dr. and was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and told that it would be difficult for me to conceive naturally. The Dr. then recommended that my husband get checked out as well. Well, his sperm analysis came back bad as well but they told him that he could probably reverse that on his own with changes in diet and some other stuff Iām not getting into lol. So, I pretty much just freaked out and gave up hope. Our marriage started getting rocky and we separated for about 3 months and within that time I was unfaithful. During that time, I realized that there was no other man on earth that I wanted to be with other than my husband so we got back together, I told him of my infidelity and though he was very hurt, we reconciled and had been doing fairly well.
A couple months back I was flipping through the channels and stumbled across the Jim Bakker show lol yeah, I knowā¦ He was endorsing a Bible on CD series read by women. I thought to myself, Hey that would be great! I can listen to it in the car, while Iām on the computer etc. but I didnāt feel comfortable ordering it from him given his past. So, I got on ebay, ordered it, got it in the mail a few days later and popped it in right away. Mind you, this is before I realized there was a difference between the Catholic versions and the Protestant Versions that I had just purchased. But hey, it was still the Bible! That made me feel sooooo good hearing Godās word again! A few days after that I was flipping through the channels again and came across Mother Angelica! Iād seen her before but never thought a nun would be that interesting. Well, something made me stop and listen and it changed my life!!! I honestly canāt even remember what the show was about but I remember saying to myself āas of this moment, I am changing my lifeā and I did. I went out and purchased a ton of literature, began reading my Bible, got it set up to get our marriage (finally) convalidated in the Church, became addicted to catholicanswers, more as a lurker than a poster but hey, Iāve learned a ton!!! Went to Confession after over 10 years, began going to Church againā¦ My life literally changed in a matter of minutes. I am on cloud nine!
My only fear now is that this feeling will eventually wear off. I donāt ever want to go back to the place I was a couple months back, a life without God was MISERABLE!!
Iāve begun praying the Rosary and the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, attending the occasional weekday Mass in addition to Sunday along with my other daily prayers and almost constant conversation with Christ. Continued below:
I liked your Narnia analogy 
) I remember when the 12 yr old (11 at the time) wondered how anybody could love to pray. I know she did not mean any disrespectāit was a real question. I referred to the Narnia Tales in my desparate attempt to expalin, and it was put in my mind to explain that we seek God, even if we donāt realize itāwe search for Him as the kids searched through the house playing hide and seek. When we pray, the door may seem wooden at times, as in the wardrobe door, but if we pray sincerely seeking God, He always invites us in sooner or later to another realm.
You on the other hand are welcome to talk as much as you like. I sometimes need some supportāso youāll likely catch my posts where i need some encouraging words too
:yup: