A Pretty Face

[Job42]

I was on a website for my job search and there happened to be an Asian girl (underage) with a very pretty face. I kept staring at the picture because of her beauty and actually returned a few times to view it again. I was only staring at her face. Keeping in mind the picture was not an impure picture, and also that I haven’t struggled with impurity for many years (thanks be to God), was this a sin? A serious sin? Does the fact that she was underage make any difference? I will no longer do this if it is a sin. Thanks for any assistance.

 

[Warrenton]

Why would it be a sin? How is it different than looking at a pleasing portrait? There is nothing sinful about admiring a beautiful face. All the pictures of the Blessed Virgin depict her as lovely.

 

[VeritasLuxMea]

Why would it be a sin? How is it different than looking at a pleasing portrait? There is nothing sinful about admiring a beautiful face. All the pictures of the Blessed Virgin depict her as lovely.

Indeed, sounds just fine to me. God has created many beautiful things, none more so than mankind!

I don’t know what kind of thoughts you were thinking, what was in your heart? Simply admiring beauty is not a sin at all!

 

[Job42]

Why would it be a sin? How is it different than looking at a pleasing portrait? There is nothing sinful about admiring a beautiful face. All the pictures of the Blessed Virgin depict her as lovely.

The problem is that I became slightly “interested,” and it is unusual for that to happen when I only look at someone’s face (I apologize if this is offensive to anyone).

 

[anp1215]

The problem is that I became slightly “interested,” and it is unusual for that to happen when I only look at someone’s face (I apologize if this is offensive to anyone).

Do you mean interested as in “Wow, this girl is so beautiful. I wonder what her personality is like, or if we could ever date. I wonder what her story is” or “Wow, this girl is so hot, I want to do ________with her” (trying not to be graphic)

If it’s the former, no, not a sin. If you were lusting, could be a sin.

 

[Job42]

Do you mean interested as in “Wow, this girl is so beautiful. I wonder what her personality is like, or if we could ever date. I wonder what her story is” or “Wow, this girl is so hot, I want to do ________with her” (trying not to be graphic)

If it’s the former, no, not a sin. If you were lusting, could be a sin.

I’m sorry, I’m using a euphemism when I use the word “interested.” I am trying very hard not to be offensive to sensitive people who might read this…Maybe I’m being too sensitive myself

I don’t think I was really thinking anything while looking at her other than “Wow, she’s really beautiful,” and trying to ignore the fact that I was slightly interested.

 

[thistle]

I was on a website for my job search and there happened to be an Asian girl (underage) with a very pretty face. I kept staring at the picture because of her beauty and actually returned a few times to view it again. I was only staring at her face. Keeping in mind the picture was not an impure picture, and also that I haven’t struggled with impurity for many years (thanks be to God), was this a sin? A serious sin? Does the fact that she was underage make any difference? I will no longer do this if it is a sin. Thanks for any assistance.

You were doing a job search?? What kind of websites were you searching for jobs in that have photos of attractive underage Asian girls??

 

[TimothyH]

If you are saying you got physically and involuntarily “excited” while looking at the photo…I guess in Catholic terms, that would be a sin, right? Because that is “lusting”?

But to most other people, that would be considered just the human body and instinct automatically reacting to seeing a pretty girl…and it’s totally natural and not a sin at all. Without that instinct, the population would die out.

There are three types of love…

***Agape **love is love which gives and does not care if it recieves. It is one way love, from the lover to the one whom he loves. Agape love gives and gives and gives and expects nothing in return. This is the love of Christ on the Cross.

**Phileo **is brotherly love. This is love which both gives and recieves. It gets benefit and gives benefit from the other.

**Eros **or erotic love only takes. It does not care if the person loved gets anything out of it. It only wants the other for its own pleasure. This love, like agape love, is one way; the one who loves takes only from the one loved. Erotic love appropriates the “Other” for benefit of “self” and does not care if the other gets hurt in the process. *

Blessed John Paul II the Great taught that the opposite of loving someone is using someone. Hate is not the opposite of love, but use. To use another human being for your own enjoyment, even if it is hidden in the depths of your private thoughts and desires, which God sees, is the opposite of love, it is the very definition of lust, and it is a grave sin.

But I say to you, everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. (Matthew 5:28)

The OP has to ask what his intention was. To honor God through the beauty of one of his creatures? To admire beauty for it’s own sake? Or for purely personal pleasre at the thought of using the woman for his own enjoyment.

-Tim-

 

[bz5]

If you are saying you got physically and involuntarily “excited” while looking at the photo…I guess in Catholic terms, that would be a sin, right? Because that is “lusting”?

The “involuntary” party is important: For something to be a mortal sin, it has to be over grave matter (yes, lust would be) AND you have to participate with full knowledge that it is grave matter, AND you have to participate with full consent of your will.

To the OP - I, a woman, also enjoy looking at beautiful women sometimes, and I’m completely positive it’s not out of lust, but because we all admire beauty. If you did realize at some point you were becoming lustful, of course you should have stopped immediately.

 

[Warrenton]

The problem is that I became slightly “interested,” and it is unusual for that to happen when I only look at someone’s face (I apologize if this is offensive to anyone).

It is still fine. There is nothing sinful in saying to yourself, “That is a face I could fall in love with,” or even seeing a pretty face and then thinking about love generally.

There is nothing wrong with love, so long as it is chaste. In our culture, we are so used to love immediately leading to the bedroom that we are easily confused about this.

In reality, as you surely know, the proper sequence is interest, friendship, courtship, betrothal, followed at last by matrimony. The first two parts should not be physically intimate. The next two parts should only be physically intimate in a manner that is not sinful. It is not sinful to embrace, or to hold hands, or walk arm in arm.

It is helpful to appreciate that the world gives us a pattern that is false to love, false to true religion, and false to psychological balance. The world tells us in song, motion pictures, literature, that the “one-night stand” is the normal method of expressing attraction, and that attraction should be immediately followed by consummation. Rubbish.

There is nothing wrong with a pretty picture bringing forth tender feelings.

 

[underacloud]

If you are saying you got physically and involuntarily “excited” while looking at the photo…I guess in Catholic terms, that would be a sin, right? Because that is “lusting”?

Actually, no. The Catholic Church does not teach that one can involuntarily sin.

Finding someone attractive and even becoming “excited” are not sinful in themselves. They are part of the human condition and are best understood as concupiscence. Concupiscence is basically are human orientation towards sensual desires. Concupiscence leads to sin, but is not sin itself. It then depends on what we do with these thoughts and feelings. If we consent to the “excitement” and indulge in it, then we do begin to sin.

 

[Equites_Christi]

**Eros **or erotic love only takes. It does not care if the person loved gets anything out of it. It only wants the other for its own pleasure. This love, like agape love, is one way; the one who loves takes only from the one loved. Erotic love appropriates the “Other” for benefit of “self” and does not care if the other gets hurt in the process.

[/INDENT]

I’m curious where you got this definition from.

When my girlfriend and I - God willing - marry, on our wedding night I am going to be very very interested in her enjoyment of it. Does this make it not erotic love?

In fact, by your definition, it can hardly be called a species of love at all. It’s just lust.

 

[1ke]

I was on a website for my job search and there happened to be an Asian girl (underage) with a very pretty face. I kept staring at the picture because of her beauty and actually returned a few times to view it again. I was only staring at her face. Keeping in mind the picture was not an impure picture, and also that I haven’t struggled with impurity for many years (thanks be to God), was this a sin? A serious sin? Does the fact that she was underage make any difference? I will no longer do this if it is a sin. Thanks for any assistance.

scrupulosity needs professional guidance through a trained priest or spiritual director. Please go see your priest.

 

[anp1215]

I’m sorry, I’m using a euphemism when I use the word “interested.” I am trying very hard not to be offensive to sensitive people who might read this…Maybe I’m being too sensitive myself

I don’t think I was really thinking anything while looking at her other than “Wow, she’s really beautiful,” and trying to ignore the fact that I was slightly interested.

No need to apologize, just wanted to understand your meaning. If you mean “aroused” or “excited,” just use those words. They aren’t offensive, and would help to clarify. “Interested” is somewhat ambiguous.

After your clarification, no you did not sin.