A question for widows/widowers who are in a new relationship

[seagal]

My wonderful husband passed away 6 years ago. For the first 3-4 years I couldn’t even consider the thought of re-marrying, I couldn’t imagine being married to anyone else. Now 6 years later I’m starting to think that it would be nice to have someone in my life. I’m only in my mid-50’s and even though I still can’t see being married to anyone else I also can’t see myself being alone for the next 20-30 years. I’m just wondering, if anyone out there has remarried after their spouse died, what your experience has been. Is your deceased spouse still foremost in your mind? Do you find yourself comparing the two? If so, is your current spouse aware of it? Is it possible to be happy twice in a lifetime? Thank you for sharing. Send a PM if you’d feel more comfortable doing that.

 

[Falco]

My man is a widower - we met only 18 months after his wife died, and his children have never forgiven me for it. Seven years of cold politeness and snide remarks.

He misses his late wife very much, and still cries at times, especially when we visit her grave. This does not distress me at all - I’d expect him to miss her after 40 years of a very happy marriage. But at the same time we are very, very happy together, and his pain gets less. I don’t mind his stories of their life together - I have stories of my own to share.

You may find it a bit difficult to ‘break in’ a new relationship - you are years out of practice, but if God brings you someone - go for it! Just don’t rush into marriage because it is a state you are used to - you are also very out of practice with adjusting to a new person. It can take time.

 

[BettyBoop416]

My man is a widower - we met only 18 months after his wife died, and his children have never forgiven me for it. Seven years of cold politeness and snide remarks.

Congratulations on your happiness.

Those “children” need to grow up. Missing their mother is no excuse for treating you that way.