Therese’s sister Leonie as a witness of Therese’s Spirituality of Imperfection
…Leonie was regarded as the ‘difficult child’ who led her dying mother to grieve, “I just don’t know what to do with her.” …
Leonie knew that she lacked her sisters’ enthusiastic piety and according to her mother, she “will not pray to the Lord unless she has no choice.” Yet when at her own request her mother shared with her the life of Jesus, Leonie wept when listening to her account of the Passion. With this love of Jesus and with meek awareness of her faults, Leonie actually revealed the seeds of the true gospel spirituality and of the humility that was later to lead to holiness.
Leonie shared none of the holy sentiments of her sisters in receiving her First Communion (May 1875, at age twelve). Later she confessed, “that day was not the finest of my life; my childhood and youth were spent in suffering the bitterest trials.” Her severest trial was in recognising that although like her sisters she knew the catechism thoroughly, she remained prone to moodiness and temper outbursts.
Leonie was aware of the anxiety that her behaviour caused. She agonised over her own incorrigibility and self-perceived inferiority. However, to the surprise and some regretful scepticism of family, when her aunt lay dying, Leonie wrote to her requesting that she intercede with God that she be granted conversion and grace “to be a true religious.” Although less favoured than her sisters, Leonie’s aspirations reveal God’s blessing upon this troubled adolescent. Leonie endured several unsuccessful attempts to enter Religious life, and only succeeded in becoming a professed Religious after the death of her saintly youngest sister…
Following two failed attempts at Religious life, Leonie’s limitations were further highlighted when her youngest sister Therese entered Carmel at fifteen. Soon afterwards, Leonie found herself responsible for caring for their father alongside Celine, but with the three sisters in Carmel writing for news of him, addressed their letters to Celine, with only brief postscripts to Leonie. Despite their goodness, the Martin sisters appeared unable to take Leonie seriously, thus reinforcing her poor self-esteem, although she accepted these things humbly as her due.
Three years later, Leonie made a retreat with the Visitation Sisters whom she frequently visited. Subsequently she received permission to enter the convent. At this time, Therese began to write letters that remained to encourage Leonie.
Therese wrote, “Jesus is well pleased with you; I know it; although He still allows you infidelities in your heart. I am sure that the actions of love, which He gathers up, outnumber them by far. Which of us two Therese’s will be more fervent? Whichever is more humble, more united to Jesus, more faithful in performing every action through love. Oh, let us pray for each other that we may be equally faithful…Let us not refuse Him even the smallest sacrifice; everything is so important in religion, that even picking up a pin, if it is done through love, can convert a soul. What a great mystery! It is Jesus alone who can give such value to our actions; let us love Him with all our hearts.”
…Leonie’s position always remained humble, however she was happy with “little sacrifices known only to Jesus”, her “little nothings” that she offered for the salvation of souls “as little as I am myself.” She had special compassion for anyone in sadness or difficulty, having experienced these from infancy. “I have suffered greatly from my inferiority,” she wrote, “I have felt keen isolation of heart—of every kind. I experience the same difficulties again and again; worries, dislikes and weariness of all sorts. But I feel that all these kinds of torments are a purification —that God is at work; and I thank Him for all of it.”
“I know well that Jesus asks nothing of His lowly little one except effort; and so I am far from being discouraged, for I want to remain in my complete helplessness, which is my strength. By this childish ruse I touch the heart of God.” Clearly, Leonie had learned well to put into practice the Little Way of spiritual childhood witnessed by Therese.
Leonie’s Carmelite sisters continued to write encouraging letters, as a sense of inferiority and rebellion in infancy and childhood confers some lasting difficulties, and ill health can cause emotional stress. Her sister Pauline wrote, “How God has loved you, and how surprised you will be in Heaven by the glory and love you enjoy! It’s all the same to God if one has a bumpy forehead and crooked teeth!” Leonie was aware of her lack of soundness, as she endured itchy eczema, scalp dermatitis, loss of her ‘crooked teeth’, migraines, nausea, intestinal inflammation, ingrown toenails, and frequent colds that developed into bronchitis or pneumonia. In 1930, her knees required surgery, and henceforward she was unsteady, her condition exacerbated by painful, crippling rheumatism.
Leonie lived with pain and discomfort, however the Visitation community cared very kindly for “the shrivelled old woman” who was unable to “find any comfortable position” for her aching body. “My ailments are increasing,” she wrote, “No part of me is healthy any longer except my eyes, my heart, and my head, thanks be to God—but He can take everything, for everything belongs to Him! I abandon my intelligence, small and poor as it is.” If God desired it of her, Leonie offered to sacrifice everything, even to suffer the feared loss of mental faculties that her father endured.
In 1941, Leonie suffered a stroke as she rose to receive Communion, losing her ability to speak. She lingered for five days until dying on June 17. During those last days, Leonie clutched both a rosary from Marie and a crucifix, mute testimony of her love. When on her last evening two lay sisters brought her roses sent by her Carmelite sisters, Leonie, Therese-like, lovingly unpetalled them over her crucifix. Hearing of her death, thousands ignored Nazi occupation forces to honour this humble Sister. God also appears to honour this woman of ‘little worth’.
I feel that 'poor Leonie" was an excelent example for us of sanctity of the ordinary and even scarred spirit, of the spirituality of imperfection of St Therese of Lisieux.
Sorry for hogging so much space.
You can be, too, if you want it. Those steps I suggested are one place you can start.
)…perhaps it is simply that I am in real difficulty understanding and sometimes I am indeed, and trying hard to understand.