About a church division

[Templum]

Hi,

I need to have some advice concerning a church division. Now, in my parish, there are many different customs. I organize events in order to create a community spirit. Now, it’s not always easy to gather people for events, but I manage to do it for the events that I organize. I, like others, notice church divisions, that is, people who group themselves and don’t mingle with others. I’ve seen this in my parish often. I’m talking here about a certain group of people who are the same culturally and who all do the same work in general. They do have things in common. However,when they come to Mass, they do the readings and after Mass, they do not socialize with other people outside of their click. They take pictures of each other and they go to activities with each other. Unless I insist, they will not socialize with me or with other people who I know. They don’t come our way at all. Some people have spoken about this with me. In other words, some people have noticed how “clicky” this particular group is. When we go out for coffee and food, this group is never available. They tell me that they are busy. I have nothing bad to say about busy lives. I myself am busy and cannot socialize and entertain people every Sunday. However, I do join others for coffee on a part-time basis, so that I can feel part of the family. My concerns can be summarized like this:

What does it mean when people come to Mass, do their readings and don’t socialize with parish members after Mass? People notice that this group shuts itself from other customs or people. They talk with each other, but ignore others. They create division in the church to a certain degree. What can I or others do to integrate them more in our coffee outings? I have ideas already, but more can be helpful. What can we do to reach out to this group and make the church a unified setting and not a divided one?

Thanks,
Templum

 

[Bailey2]

I’m not sure. I think all parishes have these cliques. But I will tell you that one Sunday, the new in-residence priest gave a sermon on how some are “on the inside” and others “on the outside” and that these divisions were not what Christ would want in His community. He went on to describe the parish groups. He was pretty blatant and there were some complaints to the pastor afterwards. I understand the pastor did nothing about the complaints and gave a similar but gentler sermon on the same topic several times after that. So, perhaps get the padre on board!

 

[prodigalson12]

Good job, it’s about time someone took note of that one going on. I hear so much gabbing at the end of mass, yet you don’t get the time of day from these very same people because you don’t already know them, … sad, really sad…

You may have to be more direct on this one, speak up and make yourself heard, they are seriously losing a great deal of opportunities to meet and fellowship with new quality people. We don’t have it like the days of old, where the parishoners met in their homes so naturally had a big family, everybody knows each other mentality like we do now, so we should reach out more for times together in the manner you are trying. Know that you are not alone at all.

 

[Templum]

Hi,

I want to thank you for your replies. I read them and got inspired from them. I did something about this division. I spoke up and invited everyone to one big coffee shop, so that all small groups can meet there. I explained to some parish members that I wanted to do fellowship and that it was time to get together once in a while to share and eat together. Well guess what? I got more people than I thought. People from different customs showed interest in going to a big coffee shop to eat and to talk. I was surprised. I spoke about this with my priest and he seemed happy about it. Anyhow, you all gave me the inspiration to get up and take action.

I enjoyed your great ideas!

Templum