Absolutely devastated

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chris1971

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I was in the process of reading this morning’s Mass Readings at Mobile Gabriel and was seized for a moment by an impure thought or idea. It related to Jesus producing a child from nowhere in order to make his point that the least are the greatest - I wasn’t thinking in terms of 2000 years ago and that children then were the lowest of the low in social terms…I was instead gripped with the current social image one might have of a group of men sitting around with a child. I can’t even go on…I’m sick with shame and guilt that this would have netered my mind.
I honestly don’t know what to think or do - i suppose on some level this might be normal given today’s moral climate and the things we read about in the news, etc., but this was the Gospel and the Lord and I feel like I’m eternally scarred.
Please help -
 
Thoughts can come from anywhere–your own mind (an intentional thought), a random neural firing in your brain (dreams), the Holy Spirit, your guardian angel, or a passing evil spirit.

Obviously, that thought was not something you would intentionally think on your own. Similar thoughts sometimes occur to me, especially in the wee hours of the morning when I’m making my rounds at the boat factory.

Rather than dwelling on them, I just think (or even say out loud), “That was not my thought,” and get on with my life. It also helps to replace the thought (or thinking about the significance of the thought) with something more edifying, like a Hail Mary, an Our Father, or a Glory Be.

DaveBj
 
I’m somewhat confused as to what happened to you… is it possible to be more clear on it? I don’t want to push you here, I just want to understand so I can help you.

But what I can tell you is that I have had some of the worst thoughts you can imagine enter into my mind. Sometimes it just happens. If you didn’t consent to it and it just showed up, its not your fault. If you are feeling very guilty, go to confession! That way you can be sure that its all in your past and doesn’t matter anymore. Just pray to the Lord. Peter denied Jesus 3 times at the hour of His death! But He forgave him 🙂
 
I’m mortified, but there was literally a moment where I thought that they might have defiled the little boy. I know how terrible that sounds and it really pains me.
I understand that the thought isn’t mine - random, generated by some other stimuli like current affairs or evil spirits - but it’s so unsettling… 😦
 
You are obviously very bothered by this. That’s great! Let me explain: From how much this bothered you, I can tell that you probably haven’t had thoughts like this in the past. If this is the first time that you have ever had a thought like this, then you have been doing very well in your walk with Christ, better than most. 👍
 
If you feel it was a impure thought, ask God for forgiveness, and move on. Everybody sins. It happens.

I don’t mean to sound insensitive, but it seems like you are making a mountain out of a molehill.
 
MikeW -
Not at all…I almost think in times like this I need someone to tell it to me like it is. I’m going through a sort of ‘neurotic’ period right now with things at home and work and I think I’m reacting (or overreacting) to most everything in my life right now. Thanks for the honesty and God bless.
 
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mikew262:
If you feel it was a impure thought, ask God for forgiveness, and move on. Everybody sins. It happens.

I don’t mean to sound insensitive, but it seems like you are making a mountain out of a molehill.
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I agree. Sometimes (as previously pointed out) the devil will will roll a thought across the lanscape of our mind in hopes that we will grab onto it (either in horror, amusement, curioisity, lewdness, …) and then make it our own as an occassion for sin.

Simple response: ignore, replace thought w/ edifying thought, rebuke satan in the name of Jesus/His precious blood (even if not from the devil just to cover the bases) – btw, the devil does flee, maybe not immediately, but at times persistence is required; otherwise practice exercising fortitude of mind, ask the holy Spirit if there is unforgiveness, unconfessed sin, or a source of exposure that is leaving you prone to such thought production.
 
chris1971,

Don’t let this bother you. Obviously such thoughts are not something you cherish, nor are they about things you condone. Ask for the Lord’s mercy, and keep moving on. If anything, the more you dwell on it, the more harm it will do to your peace of mind.
 
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DaveBj:
Thoughts can come from anywhere–your own mind (an intentional thought), a random neural firing in your brain (dreams), the Holy Spirit, your guardian angel, or a passing evil spirit.
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Hi DaveB, where does that come from? How can created beings place thoughts in our minds?

Hi Chris, don’t beat yourself up. In Galations 5, we learn that dumb thoughts like that comes from our sin nature. Simply get in the habbit of putting that nature on the cross on a daily basis Romans 12:1-3, and choose to walk in the Holy Spirit Eph 5:18. Simply write it off to inexperience and ask God for wisdom James 1:5. We all have dumb thoughts from time to time.

👍
 
Hey, I know what you are going through. This happens to me a lot, particularly in times of stress. Many people report things like this happening during prayer or mass. Sometimes it may be the devil or it may be your subconscious, only God knows unless it is obvious. We are bombarded with images and stories from the media, so these strange thoughts are bound to happen to a lot of people. The point is, if you drove the thought out of your head, then don’t worry about it. Ask for Jesus or St. Michael’s help directly if it happens again. Don’t try to drive the thoughts away yourself, just focus on Jesus.

If you dwelled on the thought and entertained it, just go to confession, then you will be forgiven. Don’t worry, the priests have heard it all and remember, it is Jesus you are talking to in the confessional. He already knows our sins anyway, so don’t worry about confessing them. Don’t let excessive guilt ruin your peace. You will get a lot of peace from the sacrament of confession, especially if you are like me and are not always sure if you entertained the thought or if you deliberately came up with the thought.
 
Chris,

dont give it another thought. That’s how the devil will try to get you. Just ignore it and go on. You didn’t will it. You’re absolutely fine. You seem to be scrupulous (I’m speaking from my own experience here). Trust in the mercy of God.
 
Daniel Marsh:
Hi DaveB, where does that come from? How can created beings place thoughts in our minds?
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I’m a created being, and I obviously put into your mind the thought to ask that question 😉

Read your Bible and note the references to an evil spirit putting a thought into someone’s mine, or Satan himself putting something into someone’s mind (specifically, Judas).

DaveBj
 
Judas was possessed

Luke 22:3
Then Satan entered Judas, called Iscariot, one of the Twelve.

John 13:27
As soon as Judas took the bread, Satan entered into him.

before that Judas had a problem from his sin nature.
 
The bottom line Chris, Dave and all, there is internal influence ( our flesh or sin nature ) and external influnces ( the world, entertainment, created beings, etc., ) and these work together to cause us godly people problems. We all need to recoginize this and draw near to God, and forgive ourselves when we have bad thoughts.

👍
 
Daniel Marsh:
The bottom line Chris, Dave and all, there is internal influence ( our flesh or sin nature ) and external influnces ( the world, entertainment, created beings, etc., ) and these work together to cause us godly people problems. We all need to recoginize this and draw near to God, and forgive ourselves when we have bad thoughts.

👍
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Egg-zactly.

And 👍 on you too! 😃

DaveBj
 
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